Is it reasonable for a man to literally refuse to approach women?

[Anonymous]

Or to never ask women out or so forth or try to compete for women.

[Anonymous]

I literally refuse. Granted, every guy is not the same, nor same circumstances, and so forth. However, for me - I have zero time to waste with 'no's' and/or 'drag it out forever to only turn into a no eventually' scenarios. You're interested in me? Fantastic, say something (And fyi, many of us males don't 'get' subtle hints, we are piss poor at interpretation in general). Some have joked (or perhaps not in jest) that I'm arrogant, cocky, or jaded. Confident and having a 'no time for outdated little courting games' are my argument against the 'He's a narcissist' label as well. Honestly, I've simply filled my life with passions far outside of anything related to dating/love/sex/etc. That, plus the statistical reality that you lovely ladies are inundated (in most cases) by guy attention - especially on dating websites and apps. Sorry, but some of us don't want lost in anyone's 'slush pile' and we don't play games and we don't need dates, etc. to survive. Final thought - you want a guy to go on a date with you? Ask him.

[tom-tom-traveler]

It's reasonable to feel frustrated if you're not getting any traction when asking out a woman, but it's not entirely reasonable to refuse to interact with women altogether. Make sure you're not being too choosy when selecting potential candidates. Also, try to make sure that you're not giving off an air of defeat, as if you're already expecting her to say no before even asking the question.

I honestly didn't start getting 'yes' answers from women until I stopped trying so hard to look for a date. That can cause a level of intensity in some people that can make you look desperate to most women.

[Asker]

Well in the case of me, I literally refuse to approach women.

[Jarre12345]

Chasing and approaching women makes you look more desperate

[vishna]

You would be missing out on either a lot of girls who refuse to approach guys, really shy girls, or the woman who wants a guy to come up first.

Competing is reasonable who wants to fight like a starving tiger for a piece of flesh sure not me that is reasonable.

Never asking women out is unreasonable very unreasonable.

[falsonome]

You're assuming that a woman will say yes because I approached her.

[newusername808]

Its perfectly reasonable. If a women wants me to help her move or to help her lift something heavy then she has no reason not to approach me for other things. That's how I see it. I absolutely refuse to give women any extra attention or approach them. Even if I like them. It's on them. You can't be afraid to lose. Moments pass us by all the time.

[whattothink]

i would think it is perfectly reasonable if you are gay or asexual. Otherwise have fun missing out on girls. Some of us do not like approaching guys so you may just miss your soul mate.

[Asker]

See below

[falsonome]

Its reasonable if asking a woman out lead to the "I have boyfriend line: or if they give a number that isn't fake the still cane blow you off by telling you they changed their minds or their caring for a sick friend. I haven't approached a woman in 10 years and it hasn't affected my dating life as it was nonexistent before. Not approaching woman has saved me time, money and aggravation, it is a win. I don't want to be single but my wants haven't mattered thus far.

[Slartybartfast]

Yes, in fact it's completely inappropriate in this age for a man to approach. I have two older sisters , ice spent my life listening to them complain about men's unwanted advances. I went to college and was taught that men are all potential rapists and was give a list of contradictory and one sided rules to follow.

If a women is interested, she'll let you know, otherwise it's harassment and men who still approach deserve the worst Men who approach women need a long stay in a small and cold prison cell. Castration for repeat offenders. It's the 21sy century, male sexuality is a criminal offence, best to avoid women entirely.

[Rachelspiks]

Nothing that you've written here is true, and you know it. You went to a college that taught that all men are potential rapists? I don't think so.

[Slartybartfast]

@Rachelspiks

www.google.com/.../bs-xpm-1993-05-08-1993128032-story,amp.html&ved=2ahUKEwjmqvPcn6TzAhVnmWoFHRYOAjIQFnoECAgQAQ&usg=AOvVaw19uhH03k2gFHVmF8r3sNdT&cf=1

[Slartybartfast]

"Everyone with an identifiably male name, such as Tom or Mohammed or John, ended up on an alphabetized list."

Hi, I'm Tom...

Knowing is half the battle...

[Rachelspiks]

"The school administration considers the display "inappropriate" and an error in judgment, Mr. King said, but the case also raises thorny issues about free speech."
This was not endorsed by the school in any way; it was an "art project" by a bunch of radical nutcases back in 1993, before you would have attended there (you're 31, too young to be a student back then).

[newusername808]

@Rachelspiks ummm yeah what was written is very true. Self protection classes say that in so many ways. Some men have proven to be dangerous. It's social programming. And you know it's true.

[assembledtoy]

I believe it's resonible. Sometimes guys can struggle when trying to approach a girl and her being after other guys. But if there's a chance with a girl that you might be attracted too and she seems really flirty then I'd go after it. If you want to remain single and you don't think having a girlfriend is a big deal, that's also fine. But yes, it's reasonable.

[Wester1967]

I don't. The laws in the USA are too dangerous. I don't even like to get near women. Unless it's on camera with a record that can stand up in court. Not that I disagree with the laws, but I'm not gonna put myself in danger. And FYI I am a big feminist, left wing, pro abortion, women's rights advocate. But I'm still not going anywhere near women right now. This is what women wanted and this is what you all got. If you want me, you can call me, but don't come anywhere near me. Thanks.

[Rachelspiks]

What on earth are you going on about?

[Wester1967]

@Rachelspiks You're not getting any date with me so don't even try. Stop trippin

[Rachelspiks]

Don't worry, I wouldn't want someone like you. You live in the U. S., and you people are really weird.

[Wester1967]

@Rachelspiks Don't come near me.

[Wester1967]

@Rachelspiks Go stand in the corner please and keep your hands to yourself

[newusername808]

@Rachelspiks Eating mayo on french fries is weird...

[TylerMMA]

Completely. If you have no interest in meeting someone that is.

[newusername808]

Not true... I would never go out of my way to meet someone. I think the point is not putting women on a pedestal. Make them work and make it fair for both parties. My whole adult life I have refused to give women I don;t know any special attention. If they want to get to know me they have to put in the work. Once we get pass that foolishness we can become friends. Even then I will not treat her any differently. We have to be friends and when that true friendship happens the rest in equal measure falls into place. With both parties expending equal effort to make the friendship work.

[slipslender]

i don't think so... you should at least give it a go once.

[Tahlequah]

So how many times do I ask women out before I get sick and tired of hearing "no" ?

[slipslender]

until you find the right one who says 'yes' :)

[Asker]

And what if you refuse to ask because you don't want high maintenance women?

[Shaun]

It's perfectly reasonable if you're hot. Girls WILL make the first move if they want you.

[Dchrls78104]

Yes, and perfectly understandable (and safe!) these days.

[AltTech]

Sure. He shouldn't expect to die alone though.

[Asker]

I don't. I would only expect to die alone if I were short, fat, ugly, poor or had a poor attitude about women. I just refuse to play the game.

[AltTech]

I don't "play the game either." But I still approach women that I think are worth my time. If I feel like a game is being played, I stop wasting my time.

[Asker]

I don't think women are worth my time unless they come to me on my terms

[Galaxie500]

yes., it's not a crime.

[Anonymous]

It's reasonable if you want to remain single. :)

[Asker]

Why won't women ask men out? This is a double standard. I demand an answer

[Opinion Owner]

You just answered your own question; it's a double standard. One that's still pretty ingrained into our society. Even if we recognize that there is a double standard, it takes time for these things to change.

[Asker]

Yeah so when was the last time you saw an extremely good looking woman ask a man out?

[Opinion Owner]

I don't really pay attention to the behavior of "extremely good looking women". Though, I would imagine that they are less likely to ask men out, since they have more than enough men to choose from out of the guys who are asking them out. There's not much incentive for them to do so.

If you want someone to blame, blame your male counterparts. But that said, you're not going to stop other men from asking out attractive women, so if you're trying to prove a point by not asking out women

[Opinion Owner]

yourself, the only thing you're actually changing is the likelihood of you getting with an attractive woman.

[Asker]

No I think good looking women should ask men out, otherwise they're high maintenance.

[Opinion Owner]

What you think women should do, and what they actually do, aren't the same thing.

[Asker]

Women should ask men out, because otherwise it's hypocritical in a supposedly gender equal society. Writing it off as a man's job is sexist

[Opinion Owner]

I don't disagree.

[Asker]

In any case I will continue to demand women come to me on my terms. Playing petty social games and competing for women is beneath me.

[Opinion Owner]

Best of luck.

[Asker]

Why did you say I will remain single

[Opinion Owner]

Well, as we already talked about, there probably aren't a whole lot of attractive women who ask men out.

[Anonymous]

So. . . when's the last time you had sex?