If you have a preferred type of man or woman you want to date would you let that all go to date someone the total opposite?

[Anonymous]

So my boss hired a new guy to work at our warehouse, he didn't really talk to anyone except for the other men in the warehouse but for some reason we hit off fast. We literally became friends, we always hangout, have lunch, I even slept at his house once ( we didn't do anything ). So one day I was teasing him about how all the girls thinks he's cute and he told me he wasn't interested in any of them, it felt like he was really stern about his preference in woman. So here I am thinking okay so he's not into me, that's when I started feeling safe around him. So last night he was acting jealous when he saw me smiling, laughing and hugging one my old co workers that came to visit after leaving for 2 years. So I thought maybe I assumed he was, he actually admitted that he was jealous telling me how, he doesn't know why I like him because he looks ugly I'm better looking than him, etc... so I told him why do you care. Because you love women with a nice toned body ( I'm overweight) so he then told me he didn't mean like that when it came to me, he thinks I'm really cute and sweet but he just have a preference. So I just don't understand why get upset and jealous if you're not attracted to me.

[Anonymous]

What if his preference is just not “coworker”? Unless you’ve ever dealt with someone you work with then you probably can’t imagine the drama, gossip and otherwise that can come with it, even if you try to keep it secret. On top of that, let’s say you two tried to date and it didn’t work out, then he’s stuck trying to navigate around you and trying not to have awkward encounters. So while yes he may be honest about you not being his type, it could be the bigger picture and he just wants you to feel very friend-zoned.

[Asker]

Yes I understand that and I was totally okay with it, but the way he gets jealous at times, it's just odd. He even wanted to fight a guy at a bar because the guy was flirting with me.

[Opinion Owner]

Have you ever tried being direct and asking him about this behavior? Since you are friends I think it’s fair.

[Asker]

When he admitted that he got jealous I was asked him why and it felt like he really didn't have a answer, he just said, " that's how I am, I'm a jealous type of person "

[Opinion Owner]

I kinda figured something along those lines but was curious if he’d have a more respectable explanation. I don't know how old this dude is but his actions are not only young minded, but possessive in nature. He lacks the confidence (and maybe the true desire since you work together) to make a move with you, and may have a hard time seeing you potentially be interested in another guy because as long as you’re single (to his knowledge) there’s still a shot for him. Even though you’re “not his type”, even though he’s still exploring his options and all that. I know in some ways this could feel flattering or cute, but it’s not, simply because his actions are selfish and pretty immature. If I were you I’d start making sure there’s a clear line between friend and romantic interest. Don’t talk to him about anything relatively suggestive, like other women finding him attractive, being his type and things that friends don’t really discuss. Like if wouldn’t ask a female friend those questions, don’t do it with him. It’s just setting boundaries so there’s no more of this confusion.

[TheSpaceGnome]

I prefer a woman who is like me mentally. I would never date a mental opposite.