Context, the first couple weeks were great. Sending lovey sexts, talking frequently, great sex, spending time together. Then a miscommunication happened that made her upset and she’s pulled away significantly since. I kept asking her out past couple weeks and was brushed off. She even was flirting hard sexually, and when I told her I was on my way she said no. Said she’s addicted to our sex but not sure she’s the one for me. I let convo settle. Then she asked me a day I was free and we agreed to meet. After a few weeks of not seeing each other I could tell things were different after she turned cheek at my first kiss. Date started off great as a catch up sorta thing then went sour on our way back to hers. Told me we rushed things, took the start way too fast for her and feels confused with herself and doesn’t wanna be put through past trauma. Agreed and reassured her the past is in the past. Sent me home with homemade cookies as a means to keep contact. No touching or intimacy at her place unlike usually aside from a peck goodbye. Didn’t hear from her till yesterday (5 days) when she asked about her cookies but that’s it. I’d keep the convo going slightly and probably ask her out again but she stopped replying after I told her they were delicious!
She’s been posting quotes on socials like “true intimacy happens when a man makes you feel safe in his presence”, which I know is directed at me, but I don't know how to make her feel safe when she’s closed of. Other than having conversations and actually having her reach out for more than cookies I don't know what to do. I put in the work originally and got rejected, I also hate being rejected when I can feel a pull back to begin with. Should I reach out again and probably get rejected cuz she doesn’t know what she wants (hypothetically), or stay patient and let her come to me more. Even though I don’t think she’s going to when she’s been so standoffish! She’s sexy and stubborn:/
She’s been posting quotes on socials like “true intimacy happens when a man makes you feel safe in his presence”, which I know is directed at me, but I don't know how to make her feel safe when she’s closed of. Other than having conversations and actually having her reach out for more than cookies I don't know what to do. I put in the work originally and got rejected, I also hate being rejected when I can feel a pull back to begin with. Should I reach out again and probably get rejected cuz she doesn’t know what she wants (hypothetically), or stay patient and let her come to me more. Even though I don’t think she’s going to when she’s been so standoffish! She’s sexy and stubborn:/
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
1Opinion
Honestly bro, you need to move on. She sounds like she has a lot of serious issues. Nothing you do or say is going to fix all her problems. It’s not your job to fix her problems. They’re hers. You’re going to end up as her stepping stone. Find a girl who is somewhat stable.
Hmm she sounds very complicated. I’d find someone who’s not so dramatic and indirect.
I’d completely agree, it’s just very strange the signals I get from her. She likes my stories a lot, and one day after ignoring my subtle invitation to see her and ask her about her week, she just told me everything over text, ignoring the “meet up”… but then sent me a date idea a day later. Told her to let me know, but nothing other than a likes. She also posts stories from accounts saying find someone who puts in equal energy into you. She’s the one who didn’t want to put in energy or communicate so I’m sitting here curious how she posts this but her actions don’t show her real perspective 🤷🏻♂️
Maybe she’s not interested, or not interested enough?
Could be the case. We were talking over text about a week ago, very sexually to understand the situation. She was insinuating I come over on my lunch break. Told her I’d be there within half an hour on my break. Texted her I was almost there and she says “No”. After a few confusing texts back and forth she says “she gets attached to sex, I’m not the person for you, but she’s addicted”. Was playful and said “some addictions are healthy” and basically got no response and she changed the subject hours later. There after communication went from talking daily to maybe getting a response if I’m lucky be involved. Last date ended with her telling me she’s sorry for being a bad communicator and I just went along with it and said it’s a party of getting to know someone. Not much communication been done since. Aside from liking stories and whatnot