How to get over my uni crush?

[crazygal24]

Hey,

so about 3 weeks ago I had this seminar from my university and I kinda got a crush on one of the guys I met there (see my last question). We were assigned in a group of 4 with two other students and my crush and I were getting along really well. The seminar was 4 days long, but the first two sessions were online, so we only saw eachother twice in person. During the 2 in person sessions I felt like my crush was lowkey teasing me/flirting with me but I'm not sure if it was really flirting or if he just has a flirty personality lol.

On the first day of the in person class (which was also the first day we saw eachother in real life) he came a little bit late to class and sat down next to me because that was the only available seat. After he saw me, he smiled to me and said "What's up". Then during class, he'd show me proudly how he scored 100% in a quiz from the course or ask me if I already presented my solo-project (since he was a little late and missed the beginning of the class). Or when I decided to do the partner exercise we got assigned to with the girl next to me instead of him, he acted mad and jokingly said "I didn't want to do with you anyway" while grinning. And when we were working on our group presentation, he said "If I mess up anything during presenting, you got me".

After the seminar I found his Instagram through a little stalking but it was private. I sent him a request with a fake account but he didn't accept the request lol. Also found his friends IG's and I tried to figure out if he had a girlfriend (I was wondering because on the last day of the seminar, I noticed him wearing a love necklace but it looked kinda cheap).

Even after 3 weeks I still think about him. I was hoping to bump on him somewhere on campus but it didn't happen. I literally see his friends every other day in the main library but I never saw him after the seminar. After 3 weeks we all will have a 2 month summer break but I want to get over him by now lol. What should I do?

Updates

1 y

By the way, I don't want to send him a request on my real account because we don't even have any mutual followers so he'll know I found him through stalking him... and if he wanted to have my IG, he could've casually asked me in the seminar but he didn't. I just want to get over him tbh. I'm not in love with him or anything but been thinking about him ever since the seminar...

[genericname85]

you just continue living your life. "getting over someone" isn't so much an activity. it just comes automatically with time. just don't allow you to spend excessive time thinking about him. it's ok to be depressed and sad for some time. but don't let it take over your life.

[crazygal24]

You‘re right, thank you… I‘m trying not too think about him too much but I always find myself hoping to bump on him when I‘m on campus…. or when I see his friends somewhere I get excited because I hope he‘s there too….

[genericname85]

Yeah. At some point you'll naturally realize that you're planning a future with someone who isn't eben involved in that plan and that point you'll automatically lose interest. Especially when your life goes in a direction you wanna go and that is away from him.

[crazygal24]

Thank you, I‘m gonna screenshot your reply and save it in my gallery. " At some point you'll naturally realize that you're planning a future with someone who isn't even involved in that plan“ even though this should be common sense, this is some deep stuff!! I guess I just like having a crush too much…

[genericname85]

Yeah that's what having a crush is mostly. It's indulging in a fantasy about a person. It's not actually rooted in reality. Also from my experience, it's the best to try and not have any contact with them ever. That only refreshes that delusion of for crush

[crazygal24]

Yeah you’re right…. But it doesn’t always have to be pure delusion. Sometimes the crush can be mutual and it could lead to a date or even relationship. I think the real problem is having a one sided crush or just one person interested in general

[genericname85]

sure it can be mutual. but in order to not "crush" yourself, you gott find that out asap so you can have closure. if it's mutual, that's not a problem. you can just get together then xD

[crazygal24]

Well if it was mutual he would’ve already find a way to contact me ask for my socials or number in the first place. I think he liked me more as a friend

[genericname85]

so am i hearing you right? you'd rather just assume he doesn't like you and try to get over him than get clarity and find out exactly how he feels for a fact?

[CrazyGirl2]

I saw your update, and you are correct, if he wanted your IG he would have asked for it…. But, if he wanted your phone number he would have asked for that too, and if he wanted a date, he would have asked you out! This seems like a really friendly guy, who is like that with everyone. I suggest you stop the stalking, leave him alone and understand that he could have found your IG the same way you found his. He’s not into you. Just live your life, and move on. Getting over someone, especially someone you never dated, is easy… Stop thinking about him!

[Anonymous]

Act your age. Crushes are for the immature.

[crazygal24]

Lol, how exactly do I act my age? So you’re telling me having a crush on a guy at uni is immature? People in uni literally have crushes on people they only see on the hallway

[bobby_bush_eater]

Girl, follow him on IG. That's not a big deal in the slightest.

This isn't hs and your not 12 you're allowed to make moves and just following him on IG or messaging him first would be a great way to see if he's reciprocating your interest.

It sounded like you had some playful banter/rapport and if you're not "over him" why not make a subtle move like following him or messaging him? What do you have to lose?

[crazygal24]

Thank you.
To be honest, I just think it‘s weird to follow him if we don‘t have any mutual followers. If I followed him and if he asked me how I found his IG it‘s gonna be awkward. If we had at least one mutual follower on the other hand it‘d be something else…. And I know it‘s still not that big of a deal but I‘m not the type of girl who makes the first move, I actually never really did it & I prefer the guy making the first move. I‘m just a little bit shy. Even if I followed him, I‘d never DM him first lol. That‘s like 2 first moves for me…

[bobby_bush_eater]

@crazygal24

Still though, just following him is not a huge deal and I don't even consider it a move but that's besides the point. If you follow him and he asks you about that (he probably won't and if he did I almost guarantee it'd be in a playful way) you can still just play it off like it's nothing or come up with a playful or "mysterious" thing to say.

I get what you're saying though, he hasn't in any pursued you. Even if you follow him maybe he won't do anything or you won't see him, but who knows what could happen so why not do something as tiny as press follow.

Either way time is the only way to get over a big crush, we all know how you feel. Time or someone new...

[crazygal24]

Thank you, you’re actually right. It‘s really not that big of a deal. I‘m just overthinking it a little bit too much lol…. Because I sent him several request with some fake accounts and he never accepted it so if I send him a request from my real account I‘m afraid he‘ll figure out it‘s me somehow. I‘m actually thinking about following someone randomly who I think he follows and vice versa so that we’ll have one mutual follower at least before I follow him. On the other hand, I just realize he never actually pursued me so I‘m asking myself if it’s really worth it even if it‘s just a follow request on Instagram…

[bobby_bush_eater]

@crazygal24

Lol it's cute how much you're overthinking this. I have like 200 followers and 6 posts on IG and I get fake account requests all the time, nobody thinks anything of it and assumes it's a scammer or bot.

Yeah he never pursued you like I said but right now it's you who likes him. I'd say a follow request on IG would be perfect. That way he would hypothetically still have to message to make a move after. If he doesn't, you lost nothing and time will ease away the feeling.

I'd generally say it's better to go for it, even something as small as this. Why not?

[crazygal24]

Lol I’m actually overthinking this because from a girl perspective it can feel like a big step. And about you being requested from fake accounts on IG, I’m sure there’s at least one girl behind these accounts who’s secretly crushing on you. Girls usually get crazy when they have a crush on someone and will stalk him a lot on social media. But you’re right it’s actually better to go for it…well at least I don’t have anything to lose. But maybe before I send him a request I’ll bump into him on campus…?🙈

[spartan55]

You already posted this once... it was boring the first time too...

[QuietRunner]

find another crush

or
ask his friends to pass a message

[crazygal24]

What kind of message? 😅 if I wanted to send him any message I could just DM him on IG lol...

[QuietRunner]

@crazygal24
do in person or face to face with the friends
it will be understood better

[crazygal24]

I didn't see him after the seminar... and I only noticed his friends because I found their IG profiles while I was stalking him... only one of his friends was also from the seminar but I never talked to him in the class so it'd be really weird "to pass a message" through since we don't even greet eachother when we bump to each other on campus...

[QuietRunner]

@crazygal24
I guess IG is the best way

[crazygal24]

Thank you for your geniune opinion but I'm not trying to text him but get over him...

[QuietRunner]

@crazygal24
oh in that case focus on studies and fitness

[crazygal24]

Yeah I guess I should do that, thank you... genuine question by what I wrote do you think he liked me/was flirting with me or do you think he was just playing around/is just a guy with a flirty personality with everybody... I just would like to know from a guy perspective

[QuietRunner]

@crazygal24
guys flirt with girls they desire

[crazygal24]

But do you think his actions (the things I described above) can really be considered flirting?

[RedInnocent69]

Get under someone else.

[crazygal24]

This must be the worst advice ever….

[RedInnocent69]

Not if it works. 🤔😉😂

[crazygal24]

Well I‘m celibate so it‘s definitely not an option for me.

[In_Trance]

Stop posting this

[Kingofkings1992]

Get over it

[crazygal24]

Easier said than done

[Alicoooooo777]

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