Be honest, when you were attracted to people, were you more likely to let them know in subtle ways, direct ways, or not let them know at all?

[Extraterrestrial1999]

Subtly, if I didn't know if they felt the same way

Directly

I didn't let them know, because I was afraid, or knew they were in a relationship

Subtly, because I didn't want to be creepy or make them uncomfortable

All three, depending on the people

[DishLady]

Depends on the person. Some guys only need a subtle hint or two while others do need a slightly more direct approach. I've never thrown myself at a guy the way I see some girls do today... and I don't like for guys to throw themselves at me either. I prefer dignified flirting and progress.

[Sonorous]

Depends on what stage of life I was in. It seems to be like a bell curve. Circling back to now where I'm at a point where I won't even tell the person. Not for the same reasons as younger me. I was shy back then. It's because I have no interest in taking things further. I see the responsibilities of dating, relationships, marriage, being a parent as not worth it relative to the rewards. I'm not like most people. I've never really wanted a girlfriend in the normal sense. I just wanted people to like me.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

I am liking you, no, just kidding, for the pun, I don't know you. I do like this peculiar testimony though !

[Sonorous]

@Maybe_Maybe_not - 🤣 Yeah it took me a good little while to figure out what I wanted. Over the years I often found myself surrounding myself with female friends but never truly wanting to be their boyfriend. Basically I discovered that I'm shallow & dodgy of responsibility. 🤣Just knowing that I care about them, I'll treat them with dignity & respect (, etc) as I would any other human. But that I want nothing more than to be a friends with benefits type of relationship which is definitely not sustainable long-term. So now I recognize that my core values are basically a fantasy, so I don't pursue any women & no matter who they are, I reject all women who show interest. For their happiness & mine.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Oh my, that's a true level of honesty with oneself! wow
And... you're saying core values as a fantasy? That seems honest but lalso very endangering, at an existential level, as I think that core values are one's foundation ground one's walking on, sooo, how do you view this?

[Sonorous]

Yeah you're right. I am existentially fucked. 🤣 As a result of this, I don't feel a significant push or urge to socially mingle, progress, etc.

I notice that most guys have an urge to attract & be with women & they know that their chances will increase when they climb certain social ladders. It's a good dynamic. But I do not feel the push since I do not desire enough. I'm happy by myself & that comes with a great deal of complacency or lack of enthusiasm with many aspects of life related to the social aspects.

[Summeroflove]

Maybe subtly at first to see if they catch on and how they react. Maybe a little flirting. But if I want someone bad enough I’ll be direct. It’s not worth it to waste my time. Even if I’m rejected. I can move on.

[DizzyDesii]

I tend to remind someone that I find them hot at least twice a month, sometimes once a week. But i kept dating people who wanted daily compliments. Im not the type whose gonna keep feeding an attention whore

[DizzyDesii]

If you meant someone im not dating then i’d ease it in some random sentence and see how they react to know if i should say it again

[NathanDavis]

I invited myself to the party (neighbors party)

went to inspect the situation way more closely... approached her, made contact

got to know her a bit better over the next days, eventually ended up as a couple... not sure how to call it if subtle or direct, but definitely pro-active

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

if we call tactical surgery subtle, then yes, it was subtle, congrats anyway lol

[NathanDavis]

@Maybe_Maybe_not I could be a great surgeon...

on the pulse and knife skills, though... if someone sneezes, I'm out of there instantly

[Anonymous]

a lot of that depends on them. Nobody likes rejection. And since rejection is inevitably what happens there's typically no reason to put yourself out there. It's funny as I've gotten older I've gotten more direct. But as I've gotten older it's also taken more work on HER part. Because the REALITY is MOST women are just playing around with you. And this is why most women fail in relationships. Because they (probably inadvertently) only entertain the men who do not really want a relationship, just to get his f*** on. Because those men are typically the only ones willing to put up with the games. Because for them none of it is personal. It's all just a means to an end. F*** and move on.

[Ms_Facesitter]

Directly now. But I need to be comfortable enough around him. Else it's directly but 'fake' as in being all confident and telling him straight up that I like him only to turn red as a tomato as soon as he's gone, celebrating that I did it.
With my boyfriend, I was comfortable enough to just ask him to be together. I was a bit nervous, but he expressed his feelings towards me before. Being direct just makes things easier. They know where you're at. No time wasted on guessing.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

adorable confession haha, the pretending to be confident move is always fun !

[Account]

It is none of their business okay? It is my problem to deal with.

Joking aside, If we get very close and I happen to like them in that way, I can sort of show it in some ways (NEVER vocally though) .

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

A nonverbal hardcore fan! But is it still your strategy, currently?

[Account]

Noone can torture such feelings out of me vocally.

But yeah if that happens it is mostly my problem, not theirs 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Torture? Okay, there's a lot of pressure around here, good luck with all that 😅

[Account]

What do you mean?

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

I wish I knew exactly, but I'm merely acting on assumptions from a very thin net lol, let's save this for later

[Account]

I have no clue what you are talking about, but that is alright 🤣

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

I'm glad to hear that, a bit of uncertainty brings some fun lol

[exitseven]

I was afraid to let them know. Even if I knew that they liked me I could not make a move on them.

[sage2021]

I am a straight shooter just like it says in my profile on here. Direct!

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

I would have gladly answered, but as Sonorous said, it has evolved over time so... I can't answer the poll

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

But I'm interested in the question, the answers of people here are excellent !

[Ladsin2]

When I was younger I was significantly more shy. As I got older I became a lot bolder. Now I'm a healthy medium. Direct when I need to be, but not too much that I make anyone uncomfortable. I think.

[Anonymous]

All I have to do is rub my boobs against a guy twice so he knows it wasn't an accident and he knows everything I need him to know.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

hahahahaha

[kellytheman]

I did it subtly so I didn’t seem creepy also it depend on the girl. I guess mostly now I am actually a little more direct though.

[DrPepper12]

Usually depended on which group I was with and how much alcohol had been consumed

[Nikki1989]

If anything, I am too direct.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

I am really not surprised haha

[LiamJHayden]

Directly.