If you had a friend that you found attractive, but you didn't think he/she was feeling you, do you just tell them, or do you just keep it to yourself?

Question

megzs16 · Accepted Answer

You have to decide whether you can stay in the friendship hiding that from the other person. Can you handle being their friend? Or does it make you sad being their friend because you secretly wish you were dating instead? As far as telling them, only if you would be ok with the possibility of them flat out telling you they aren't interested. Who knows maybe they would tell you they were interested. You'll never know unless you have the conversation, but you must be ok with that fact that it could go either way if you want to have a direct conversation like that. I'd say maybe a better, safer way to go about things would be to be more causal about it just to test their reactions. Casually flirt here and there to see how they react. If they seem to like it maybe you can take it further but if they don't seem to like it then you can take it as a sign that maybe they don't see you that way. If that's the case that they don't then you'd HAVE to move forward in the friendship by respecting that.

DishLady · Accepted Answer

So I’ve had guy friends tell me that they’re into me, but it’s usually presented with humor and we ultimately just laugh it off and move on bc we know we’re not compatible. Then there are a few guys who genuinely did feel something for me but don’t say anything bc their circumstances apparently don’t allow them to think they’re “worthy” of a relationship… so instead they hop from short term thing to short term thing and “keep an eye on me” to see who ends up with me. 🤷🏻‍♀️

(Very silly in my opinion. On the rare occasions that I’ve liked someone I just told them. Whether it works out or not at least the truth is out.)

hahahmm · Accepted Answer

Back in the day I wouldn't tell a woman I found her attractive. More like I would show her or say what I wanted (in a polite way because that was my style). BUT let's say I had 20 friends and all of them were hot to me: I didn't tell all of them. That's like going in a cake shop and saying you want everything. I was always looking for more than just looks and it takes time to even get to know someone. But I was never a simp either. I never got in a situation where I was acting like a woman's boyfriend while really being treated like a sucker/nobody.

Mostly tho.. either it started from almost day or first few months of showing I wanted more or just never going there.

Zack-Bann · Accepted Answer

I would tell her for the sake of telling her

End of the day calling someone attractive is a compliment not an insult

The reason some people struggle with it is because they say “you’re attractive therefore give me your love”
That’s needless pressure and a hard situation

But a compliment or statement of observation is harmless on its own

SteveSmith1985 · Answer

If you like them back, then say something. If you don't like them back, definitely do not say anything. I am sure about this.

MrChinaski · Answer

Every friendship is different. But as a broad statement humans are too shy and more often than not should tell people they like that they like them.

Seriously. Google ''Í wish I had told him I love him'" vs ""I wish I hadn't told him I love him"". Count the hits. The jury is in.

DrPepper12 · Answer

Shoot your shot UNLESS you don't wanna risk losing a friend. Life's short. Led Zeppelin said it best:

"Sixteen, I fell in love with a girl as sweet as could be

It only took a couple of days 'til she was rid of me

She swore that she would be all mine and love me 'til the end

But when I whispered in her ear, I lost another friend, oh"

I fucked up with Tracy. We ruined a childhood friendship that never recovered. Just know what's on the line.

Kaneki05 · Answer

I flirt with them and if the flirt back it usually leads to her asking if I like her. Which I wouldn't lie to such a question so I answer honestly.

If she never asks then I assume she does not want to know as she's not into me.

NicholasRedone · Answer

Lol I must've voted last option and sounds like me in this life lol 😆 😂 and happily so : if a woman tried to hit on me or came right up to me to small talk so, I'd feel like 😯😛 and unwelcomed 😯

ZainabAli123 · Answer

I been in this situation with a guy friend for 11 years well since the age of 17 and 18 I liked him for a good 11 to 12 years it never ends well

alice55 · Answer

if I"m sure the feelings isn't mutual I say nothing if I feel like maybe it's possible and he's mature enough to not break our bonds over it then I tell him

David318578 · Answer

Can't go through life piling up regrets.. shoot your shot is the only option. If she rejects you then fuck all her friends! Lol

OneViewpoint · Answer

Keep it to yourself. Why bring it up if you're relatively sure there's no mutual interest? Just chill.

Shiprex · Answer

The way I end up dealing with women I meet and get to know is I find the negative traits they have and use them as excuses to hide the positives.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Why does he or she have to be feeling me, whatever that means?   I pass on compliments regardless.

Leonardo_Di_Vinci · Answer

Throw hints and tell them at least once to get over with the regret that you will face if you didn't tell.

EmmaMary · Answer

Personally I would tell them... Nothing Ventured Nothing Gained.

PeachyPie93 · Answer

Id keep it to myself, no need to make things awkward between us..

bralesswonder · Answer

I could also see it being overwhelming. My sister said If you are a good-looking woman sooner or later, all (most) of your male friends will try and hit on you.

KostasKouvalis · Answer

I would only tell her if we're really close and I feel comfortable with her

Eempriyanka · Answer

I always compliment and admire beauty whoever or wherever it is, if not given the chance I do it my mind! I love beauty and attractiveness.

rebelkid · Answer

I would honestly not force it. I strongly believe the Universe will hook us up if it is truly meant to be.

Anonymous · Answer

C) I would probably give her some hints, but I wouldn't tell her because I'm really too shy.

WhitneySnow · Answer

I picked the third option

blackeagle007 · Answer

I never flirt. No woman is interested in me

If you had a friend that you found attractive, but you didn't think he/she was feeling you, do you just tell them, or do you just keep it to yourself?

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Guys, how do you feel when a girl eventually confesses that she has feelings for you, and said she didn't tell him previously cause she was too shy?

If you had a friend that you found attractive, but you didn't think he/she was feeling you, do you just tell them, or do you just keep it to yourself?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Guys, how do you feel when a girl eventually confesses that she has feelings for you, and said she didn't tell him previously cause she was too shy?

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