Am I the only one who thinks it’s cute and sweet when guys slide into a girl’s DMs to try to get to know her?

[Anonymous]

I’m a big supporter of giving any man who wants to date you a chance, especially at my age. I personally believe women should be married and if a woman makes it to my age without being married, she can still find a husband HOWEVER I don’t think women should be turning down or rejecting men since we don’t have the same leverage as we do in our twenties. My friend is a very rare type of woman who is still turning heads and attracting men at 40. Her problem is she rejects every man she attracts or that I try to fix her up with (yes I invite myself into my middle aged single women friends and fix them up with men). I think she’s an odd woman who hates romance or sweetness from a man.

Recently she showed me a picture of a man who contacted her on facebook and asked if I knew him. He apparently lives in our small New England town and went to our high school, graduated a few years after us. She answered “sorry do I know you?” and he replied “no but I saw you on a mutual friend’s page and thought you seemed cool so I added” (translation: he saw her and added her because he thought she was pretty). I thought he sounded so sweet. He was asking her to be his friend, saying he wanted them to get to know each other, wished her happy Valentine’s Day, etc. When she showed me the messages I just thought “okay, there’s no way her heart isn’t melting at this man’s sweet attempt to approach her”. Wrong! I asked if she was going to agree to it and of course she said “no way! I don’t know this guy.” I said “oh come on! He went to high school with us and he knows a lot of people from our class. Get to know him and give him a chance. He could be your Mr Perfect!”

I don’t understand why she (and many women) get creeped out by men sliding into DMs. They do that because they think you’re pretty and want to show interest, which is sweet considering men get slammed for even looking at a woman these days. And we age out at 40, so if he seems sweet give him a chance.

Updates

1 y

She outright rejected him and I saw the response from him. It was “gee, you’re just like every other girl”. Granted she was nice about it but I could tell he was still hurt. He must get rejected a lot!

[ChicoFromThe305]

I stopped sliding into DMs when I realized that women's first impression of me will be that I'm some pervert or creep, all because that is what normally slides into their DMs, so I chose to be different, I dont hit them up unless they want me too or they do it first

[bowenw]

I always appreciate it when someone I don't know messages me out of genuine interest and not looking to scam me or get me to subscribe to their Onlyfans page.

[Asker]

Right? That’s what I was trying to tell her, but she rejected him and when I saw the response I actually felt bad for the poor guy. He was clearly trying to find his person and clearly gets rejected a lot. Such a shame he seemed so nice.

[bowenw]

That is too bad. Slide into my DMs anytime.

[bowenw]

Thank you for the MHO. 😊

[lanabug]

Yeah. I barely have any luck on dating sites so it's nice to know someone thinks im attractive and wants to get to know me.

[Anonymous]

On mine if they slide in they slide right out again.

[White_Widow]

But there in lies the problem. He slides into her dm because he thinks she's pretty not because she looks like a nice person.

[Anonymous]

You sound like a man trying to convince us we're obligated to go on a date with anyone who asks because they asked and we "owe" them.