My boyfriend likes another girl?

[Anonymous]

Okay, long story short, last night I found out that he really likes another girl (a good friend of mine) and that she likes him back. After my friend told me, he confronted me himself and said that he loved me waaay more than the other girl and that he never wanted to lose me, I went along and said that I forgave him, but I'm not sure if that was the right thing to do.

I really don't want to lose him because I really think I love him, but I feel so... inadequate now. I'm really hurt that he would do this but I understand why. Like we fight a lot and communication is hard for us.

So what should I do? should we try to make this work, or just let it go? Am I just making a big deal out of nothing? Lol. Thanks in advance (:

[honestyispainful]

I think you already know the answer but are afraid to admit it to yourself. When a person strays it is not the problem, it is a symptom of the problem. The first problem is that the two of you are not connecting on more than a superficial level. The second is that trust will not be a big issue for the two of you and you already feel that the relationship is not what you want. Third, he and this relationship has made you feel like you have less value to him, your friend and overall. You are worth more than this and deserve a person who you truly love, not one you think you love and one who you feel very likely does not love you. I am sure you are a wonderful person who deserves better. Just politely tell him and your friend that in the future you will not sell yourself short by having people like them in your life. A great life and future is out there for you.

[whitewolf]

if he really loves you and already has you how can he just go and say he loves your friend too, just the fact he's claiming such things shows he's undecided and not sure of things, whatever you guys had is just going downhill now and honestly I don't see how you guys can really recover from it in a more then temporary way I mean seriously if he's talking about how he loves someone else just not as much as you its a sign things aren't going to workout between you two, just let him go, be rid of him before hurts you more then this, its not worth it, he's not worth it

[XRabbitHeartX]

I'm struggling to understand what exactly happened here. Did he tell you that he likes another girl or did the other girl tell you that he likes her? Did something happen between them? Reason I'm asking is because if he says that he doesn't want to lose you but yet openly declares that he likes someone else he's such a ass and then you need to get out while you still can. I understand that you have feelings for him but how can you trust him again? Will you be happy feeling insecure all the time? if not, then get out and move on. Life is too short to sit around stressing. You should be enjoying a relationship, not feeling inadequate and dealing with all this. And no you're not making a big deal out of nothing. It's not normal for a guy to be with someone but then to admit he likes someone else too. That's messy.

[Asker]

Sorry for being unclear. Another friend outside the situation told me, and then he bought it up once he knew that I knew. I'm not really sure what happened between them, but I heard that they almost kissed once :/ thanks though

[cupcake34]

I don't think you should really forgive him. You know that his feelings for that girl can turn into something more. Communication is the most important part to a relationship. If you guys can't establish that, like it's not going to work out. If I were in your shoes, I would tell him you want to take a break so he can figure out his feelings. Because he's only suppose to have feelings for you. Say if you guys were married, you would be extremely pissed if he liked someone else! I know it's different, but it's just a suggestion. It'll be hard for you. But if he really wants things to work out, he'll ditch these feelings.