Am I just not cool enough?

[Anonymous]

I wish I was cool enough for hot girls. Where I had no shortage of cute girls posting on my Facebook, liking my photos, wanting to hang out with me, telling me that they miss me, etc.

Why are some guys such naturals at getting girls to be attracted to them, some of them are way less attractive than me, some I would say are more attractive too but still, there's nothing wrong with me looks wise or personality wise. I'm a very positive and interesting person, why are more girls not attracted to me? There are literally NO attractive girls in my life. Only girls that I'm not attracted to will try to stay in contact with me, and I'm very indifferent about it. I couldn't care less. I want hot, fun, interesting girls in my life.

How can I be cool enough for them, because I must not be if they're not showing me any interest in who I am.

[XRabbitHeartX]

From what I've learned being social is a must do if you want to gain popularity. Post thoughtful stuff as your status that's funny and unique, comment around, post fun pictures of yourself that shows you're not shy and just "fake it till you make it". It might sound bad but it does work. Or at least, I've seen it working in my own life. Sometimes you just need to think about the person that you'd want to be and just well, be that person! Don't be scared of what others think and take chances. Add some girls, flirt a bit & just remember to keep things balanced. Never too "over the top". Keep things relaxed and cool. In your head picture the guy you want to be and use your brains to pretend like you are that guy. Also learn how to take good flattering pictures. This a must do if you want to up your social game on sites like Facebook because unfortunately your looks are going to play a active role in how girls perceive you especially on pictures.

[Asker]

All I try to be is genuine, both online and in real life. I post about interesting things in my life, always have something good to say, never use profane language, post good music, occasionally a funny video or something. Only a couple of times ever has a cute girl ever posted a response to something, and I'd try to talk to her about it most with a reply back, and she would never actually continue the conversation. It made me so mad when this happened. Like why even post anything then ya know?

[sundrop28]

Act as if you were cool...sooner or later it will come naturally. Also try to get out more, the more people you meet the more likely you will get "hot, fun, interesting girls" in your life.

[Asker]

So go out to clubs and stuff then?

[sundrop28]

anywhere. not just when opportunity arises, just do stuff. Go places you think attractive and interesting girls are at

[Asker]

I work a lot though and go to school when I'm not working. My school isn't a very good place to meet girls though. There aren't any classy girls around campus at all. I wish I were going to a university.

[sundrop28]

hmm...idk. You kind of answered your own question. Its not that your not cool enough, its that your too busy.

[Asker]

I kind of have to be. I have rent and expenses to pay. Not to mention I used to be lame in high school. Ultra conservative, shy around girls, but now that I've changed some, people still don't try to reach out. I also worry about offending friends and family if I were to post things about myself that have changed. My family is pretty conservative like I said.

[sundrop28]

Im conservative also but I didn't have to change to get people to like me. That's the last thing you want to do. It depends what friends your trying to make. Are you looking for more attention from a lot of good looking girls? Or are you looking for one girl who could potentially be your girlfriend?

[Asker]

Just more girls in general. I don't have anyone I'm really interested in at the moment, but if more girls just popped into my life like they seem to with other guys I'd at least have some options to choose from. It's honestly like with some guys, girls literally just appear out of nowhere for them. I don't understand how they do it.

[Anonymous]

My guess is that you need to learn how to tease hot girls more. The hotter the girl, the more teasing and playing around is required. They are so used to having guys on their Facebook page telling them how hot they are, they need a reality check. Give these girls a hard time in a playful manner and you'll get a better response.

[Asker]

But I don't want to offend them. I do agree that most attractive girls need a reality check though it's just that sometimes I feel that teasing is the wrong way to go about it.

[Opinion Owner]

I used to think that way about "offending" them as well. What are they going to do? Cry to mommy? You need not be a complete a**hole, but you need to not be too nice to them either. Hot girls are used to guys being nice to them for no reason.

Something funny I've said to a hot girl recently with all those other guys posting complements on her page:

(in a private message)

You know, you are one of the hottest cross-dressers around. Too bad I usually go for women.

[Opinion Owner]

She loved that snarky message and now we're going out on a date this week. Hot girls tire of guys telling them how hot they are. Be different and look past her beauty and realize that she wants someone who isn't walking on eggshells around her.

[Asker]

I would never say that to a woman. And besides, guys aren't being nice to girls for "no reason" they are either doing it, just to simply be friendly, or because they like them. There's always a reason for doing things.

[Opinion Owner]

There's a chance she could be offended, but seriously, is it going to shatter her in two? She's used to all the complements. You can't usually "nice" a hot girl to like you. It is boring and she's used to it. Teasing and joking (whatever you want to say, don't have to use my lines) is the way to go about it.

[Asker]

Well that's retarded.

[Opinion Owner]

Hey, if you come up with a better system, I'd love to hear it. Honestly, I would! You haven't been having much luck, and you're not ugly, so it seems to me that you aren't exciting really attractive women. I'm just trying to provide an alternative which sounds like you haven't tried yet. I'm open to other ideas, as long as they work.

[Mr_Solo_Dolo]

I feel ya, broski. I think you have to carry a "Don't give a sh*t" type attitude. I mean I've kind of started acting like that at work and I've noticed a lot more girls are open to having conversations with me.

[irykiryk]

Expectations and reality are often not in sync.

[Asker]

But how are things so different for other guys? How can some of these uglier or lowlife guys out there get hot girls talking to them constantly? I don't understand how that works. And if they can do it, I ought to be able to, easily. I have a ton of good qualities and to have no girls ever trying to talk to me, or showing me interest like they do in other guys, it's a little disheartening and confusing.

[irykiryk]

It's the way it is.

[Asker]

What's that supposed to mean?

[irykiryk]

Somethings can never be changed.

[Asker]

So you're saying there's no hope, despite having great qualities?