During this day and age, femininity has so many contradicting meanings. Some equate it to just a certain sense of style, others, more recently, equate it with the “strong, independent woman” stereotype. Because this is something that I have been thinking about a lot lately, I thought I would share my own conclusions and opinions on “True Femininity.”
First and foremost, I would like to say that I do not think that the way you dress is integral to being feminine. However, it can enhance the appearance of being feminine. I’ve known some of the most enchanting and truly feminine women who did not dress in beautiful and “girly” clothing all the time. Their femininity simply radiated from their every word and act.
I believe that true femininity is within reach for every woman, no matter how brash, strong, and/ or independent they are. Being feminine has become something of a taboo among many young women my age due to the negative implications that they incorrectly presume that it has. In reality, being feminine does not mean that you are weak or a doormat. Quite the opposite, in fact. It requires an inner strength, compassion, and durability that is often forgotten about.
For me, being truly feminine has to do with the manner in which you conduct yourself both outwardly and inwardly. There is a type of courtesy and inner strength of will that is necessary to be truly “feminine.”
Here is a list of some of the attributes that I personally associate with true femininity:
Kindness- choosing to be kind or do the kind thing even when it would be easier or more popular to be mean, cruel, or simply ignore other’s suffering.
Gentleness- conducting yourself and speaking in a manner that is not overly harsh and is instead soft in order to make others feel more at ease.
Selflessness- doing the work that must be done without fanfare and even at the expense of more pleasurable opportunities. Also, putting the wants of your family ahead of your own in order to maintain the peace. (This does not mean putting the wants of others ahead of your NEEDS)
Gracefulness- this one is twofold. Being graceful and merciful to those who have made a mistake (not to be done to the excess.) Also, the manner in which you move, think, and speak. Think fluid, airy movements, kind and adaptable to every situation and person thoughts, and soft spoken and supportive words.
Optimism- Seeing the good in everyone, everything, and every situation. Filled with hope for a better tomorrow, and strengthening your loved ones with this hope.
Consideration- taking into account other information you know about something or someone in order to make a conversation or even that person’s life better, even if just temporarily.
Strength- this can be physical strength, but I’m speaking more on the mental strength and perseverance. Despite all that goes wrong and all that is lacking, the ability to stay strong in who you are, what you believe in, and hold onto the important things.
Benevolence- having the genuine desire to help those who are suffering or who are worse off than you are. Wanting to be a helping hand.
Empathy- feeling the pain of others as if it was your own.
Comforting- using the right words and actions to help put another at ease and help mitigate the hurt that they are feeling.
There is so many other attributes I could list, but I thought I would stop there lest the list become too long.
In the end, I think femininity is a bright light in the darkness. It is where others find peace and freedom from pain, and is a rallying point after anguish has been felt. The inner essence of femininity is a force unlike any other. Embrace your femininity, you might be surprised by the joy you feel, and the courtesy others show you.