Women DO ask men out.

[Hannah591]

If you typed in the title of myTake into a search engine, you will see pages upon pages of websites stating women never ask men out, asking if women should ask men out and even stating why women should never ask a man out! No wonder so many men believe women never ask men out and no wonder women choose not to do the asking.

A worrying amount of websites, saying why women don't/shouldn't ask men out, stated that it makes women look aggressive and makes out they're always the one to call the shots in the relationship, purely because she made the first move. So does that mean men are suddenly aggressive if they make the first move and only they can call the shots in a relationship? I'd like to think not.

Make the First Move

I encourage any woman I can to make the first move with a guy they like instead of waiting around for something to happen. Push away the ideal (likely unrealistic) romantic moment he asks you out because you may be thinking about that fantasy forever, unless you do something about it and who's to say it won't be romantic (or even more so) when you make the first move? Men like it when women make the first move because they're not great at picking up on signals that we're interested so where's the harm in helping them out, ladies? If rejection is something that's holding you back, men also fear rejection but rejection is a part of life. Being rejected for a job you want is harder to overcome than being rejected for a dinner date. There's nothing to lose.

Women do ask men out, it's not a fairytale, I promise. It may feel uncomfortable for us because of social stigma, but it does happen and more so nowadays. We're living during a time in which women want equality and making the first move with a guy is one of the steps towards equality that a lot of women are happy to take.

Let's End the Stigma

We all need to take a role in ending the social stigma of women making the first move, for a variety of reasons.

• Encourage women who want to ask a man out, without saying, "oh don't do that, that's un-ladylike". Asking a man out doesn't make you any less of a woman, just like asking a woman out doesn't make you any less of a man. If anything, you'll look confident and appear to be someone who goes for what they want in life; an endearing quality.


• Don't Take Rejection Personally, you're just not their type and at least you know where you stand with them.
• Don't be Intimidated by a woman who asks you out, she most likely isn't aggressive or controlling, like men aren't when they ask a woman out.


• Don't Read Articles saying why women shouldn't ask men out or how it makes women appear by doing so. This reinforces the social stigma and should be avoided at all costs.

[Sigma88]

Three out of the four committed relationships, including my current relationship, have been girls/women pursuing me. Half of the past sexual partners I've had have been them approaching me as well. So yes, it does happen.

I feel I should express something I believe to be true, regarding the difference between men & women in dating: Women have a very prominent advantage when it comes to dating. Statistical, women don't suffer rejection as often, or in many cases, as brutally as men. It may be wiser to allow women to make the first move, more frequently, as women appear to have better success than men (judging by the popular consensus on this site alone, I'd find that difficult to argue with).

As for rejection, yes it happens. But it's difficult not to take it personal. What I don't agree with is the "aftermath." I find it disturbing that a lot of women give off a sense of "entitlement" to a friendship after you reject said friend. Of course, no woman should ever feel forced to do something they don't want to, but to "expect" a man (whom you just told "wasn't good enough for you") to want to still be around you after that? Ladies, respectfully, you're asking for too much, sometimes. You're within your right to reject whomever, no question. But a rejected friend is within his right to walk away & end contact.

Another good take.

[Anonymous]

This. I like it.

[Hannah591]

Have you asked a guy out before? If not, do you think you will in future?

[Opinion Owner]

The guy I dated, has problem socialising; I asked him out.

[dartmaul15]

Yes, this. Personally it've been a case of mutuall interrest (though, in the later case it was her making the final move), but i belive it's healthy for a relationship if they both make moves. It won't work if one of them is to do all the work.

And if you want someone, ask the person. Worst case scenario? You're rejected. Tough luck, but at least you know there's no point drolling over the person any longer.

[TheWiseOwl]

The day a woman asks me out is the day hell freezes over.

[fiego]

@Hannah591 If you had to make an unscientific guess, what percentage of women do you think have asked a man out?

[Hannah591]

I know it's less than men, though there is a large amount of men who refuse to make the first move. I would say 25% of women do, the rest follow society's expectations that the man should do it or they're too shy. It is changing though, there are more women who make the first move, I encourage my female friends to do so and some have, resulting in relationships. This is why I wrote this, I hope more women will make the first move and those around her will encourage it, not stop her.