What do men mean when they call a woman too "masculine" ?

[Anonymous]

You hear guys call girls/women masculine a lot, but not often what specific behaviors they mean. What are "masculine" behaviors guys don't like?

[ConsultantIsBack]

This is a very good question. It's a really critical quality for my type. The problem is it's really hard to explain lol
Working out and being sporty isn't it, many feminine girls are like that. It's basically your stereotypical girly girl I guess is a good point of reference.

Just how she carries herself, how she speaks and reacts, a feminine compassionate nature, wanting a manly guy to protect her, being presentable and stylish is an obvious indication of being feminine (not typically wearing basketball shorts causally to places for example). Being well mannered, well kept, etc. Those are things that set off hardcore "feminists" or whatever. But at the end of the day. A manly man likes a womanly woman, and vice versa. in my opinion

[Asker]

Whats the difference between how a manly man and feminine female speak and react?

[Transigence]

I don't know. I love masculine behaviors in women.

But I think it's mothers that indoctrinate their sons to like certain things in women, which also happen to be the things that require the least amount of discipline and personal growth to develop. ("You don't want a woman who walks like that... she's too manly.")

This is why women are feminine... or rather, why the things we think of today as feminine are so. Women work very hard to influence what men desire through shame and other forms of covert manipulation, so they don't have to work hard to be desirable.

[Asker]

But it sounds like "feminine" behavior also involves working to behave a certain way?

[Transigence]

Yeah, it does. But masculinity and femininity are religious concepts (not in that they belong to a particular faith), which just means that they are undefined and undefinable but people can talk at length about what it means to them.

[Ghosted]

it means either masculine in appearance (as in, resembles men facially or dresses like men or is muscular like a man)
or behavior that is unlady like/ improper such as cursing a lot, burping/farting in public, being loud and obnoxious, sitting with legs apart like men, being one of the boys and hanging out with all guys, things like that.

not that men do all of the above, but there are feminine behaviors and masculine behaviors. women typically are expected to exhibit mostly feminine behaviors and males - masculine. when there's an imbalance, people call 'em out. some things nowadays are just neutral tho like working a job.

[9mfeo]

Damned if I know, man. I have never felt pArticularly feminine or masculine so I have no idea what it's supposed to mean. People who believe in that bullshit make me tired. Like, a man who likes to bake is feminine (?) and a woman who likes to play football with her friends/family is masculine (?). Who cares? People are doing things that they enjoy. There's so little in the world that's actually enjoyable that we should embrace those things instead of be told not to do them because then boys won't like you. Like I want a dude that is so insecure in himself that he can't stand to see me doing things that make me happy and confident.

[becca123]

Looks wise it could mean things like too hard, no softness or curves to face or body. It could mean a short, non-feminine hair cut. In short, she is missing some of the things historically considered "feminine."

Behaviour wise, she acts like a man. She could be loud, or curse like a sailor, drink the guys under the table, acts like "one of the guys" to the extreme with belching, darting etc. Again, she strays from what is considered the norm for femininity. Some guys are ok with this, some consider these traits too masculine.

[DodgersGM]

It can be several things. Like, if the woman bulks up a lot and becomes super muscly, then it can be seen as too "masculine."

Or if she carries herself in a certain way, that can do it too. Basically, if she acts un-lady-like too often, it can be seen as masculine.

[Asker]

What "certain way" do you mean?

[DodgersGM]

It's hard to put yur finger on. You just kinda know it when you see it. LOL. And it's not a universal thing; some guys will interpret those traits as being "too masculiine," but others won't.

For example, having a really coarse laugh, dressing more dude-like, etc.

[DodgersGM]

It's hard to put your finger on. You just kinda know it when you see it. LOL. And it's not a universal thing; some guys will interpret those traits as being "too masculiine," but others won't.

For example, having a really coarse laugh, dressing more dude-like, etc.

[Asker]

I find it intriguing that so many people talk about masculinity/femininity... But few can describe it and fewer agree!

[DodgersGM]

Haha, yeah, social constructs tend to do that to people. LOL

For example, several months ago a woman on here asked a question about what type of dress dudes like on girls. I responded with a picture of a cute little baseball t-shirt (you know, the undershirt type that's mainly white with colored sleeves) and jeans outfit, and the Question Asker concluded that I must like tomboys. LOL

[Anonymous]

in my opinion, don't worry about it. Guys that judge woman like that are no prize so don't waste your energy trying to figure out what drives them.

Anyway I wouldn't worry about what guys want, be more worried about finding what you want then going from there. I think so many relationships and marriages end badly because woman spend so much time trying to be what guys find attractive that they never actually figure out what exactly they want then they get married, pop out 2 kids and wonder why they are so unhappy. Do you, let them worry about them.

[Anonymous]

You know when a guy acts really girly, how it can turn a lot of girls off? When a woman acts too masculine it can have the same effect on guys. Just like what is too girly can vary from culture to culture or from person to person, what is too masculine can also vary.

[Asker]

So you think it's cultural?

[Opinion Owner]

To a large extent yes and for two reasons. That may simply be they easiest way they know of describing the traits the woman has. If they just aren't attracted to women that have the types of traits they grew up hearing was masculine, then she may be "too masculine" for his taste. Just like someone else might be too wild, or too boring for someone else. In this case culture created the word masculine to describe the types of traits he is talking about, even if his reason for not liking those traits is simply personal preference.

It could also be that he was raised to only value women that have certain traits associated with their gender. I remember overhearing girls that hated sports, but wouldn't date a guy that wasn't into sports, simply because they expected that behavior out of a man. The same equivalent exists in men toward women. In this case they may see the other gender as defective for not adapting to certain gender roles.

[BellePepper]

It's not a matter of them liking or disliking a specific set of behaviors. It's about them being so insecure with themselves that they just lash out at anything they can find.
media.giphy.com/media/Lhx5v4MF2r1bG/giphy.gif

[heavensgift2girls]

Women need to stop claiming everything is a male insecurity anytime she has a trait men aren't attracted to.

[BellePepper]

@heavensgift2girls LOL! so if a woman isn't attractive to YOU she's masculine. Okay XD

[WhatAreYouReading]

Oh BellePepper, how I adore you!

[heavensgift2girls]

I didn't say that. You are implying that if a man finds a woman too masculine that it means that he is insecure, and just trying to lash out at anything they can find. Calling a guy insecure anytime he isn't interested is an overused excuse. Sometimes guys just aren't going to be interested in a woman, and yes sometimes it will be because he prefers a woman with more traditional female traits. It doesn't have anything to do with him being insecure. Just like a woman liking a guy with more traditional masculine traits doesn't make her insecure.

[BellePepper]

@heavensgift2girls Bro. That's *exactly* what you said. "anytime she has a trait men aren't attracted to."

I find it amusing that you think that guys only call women "masculine"in situations where women want men to find them attractive. But I'm also guessing that you don't think there are situations women don't care if you think they're attractive or not XD

[ConsultantIsBack]

I disagree with your insecurity statement. Its just simply a matter of attraction. I prefer working with unemotional, somewhat bitchy girls at work as it gets shit done faster. I'd never in a 100 years date them tho.

It's not insecurity, just attraction. A manly man needs a womanly woman. 👍✌

[heavensgift2girls]

No, that is not exactly what I said. You took that out of context. I said that women need to stop saying that. If a guy thinks a woman is masculine, it doesn't mean she isn't attracted to him, and I never implied that it was. Her claiming he is insecure, anytime he isn't interested in whatever trait she thinks he should like is what I was talking about.

Of course the only time guys are going to call women masculine are when it comes to attraction. If we aren't talking about attraction the entire point of feminine, or masculine doesn't really have any meaning. Sexual attraction is the entire point of there being two different sexes, and that is the reason why those words were invented to attempt to describe them.

We know there are times where women don't care if we see them as masculine. The difference is that during those times women aren't running around calling guys insecure. It is only when she cares, that she starts proclaiming all guys that aren't attracted are insecure.

[BellePepper]

@ConsultantIsBack I have some news for you that may be difficult for you to hear. Women are not always worried whether or not YOU find them attractive.

[ConsultantIsBack]

Well no fucking duh lol
Just pointing out your insecurity comment is inaccurate, that's all

[BellePepper]

@heavensgift2girls You and @ConsultantIsBack just told me that you think of women as masculine when YOU aren't attracted to them. That's like the definition of insecure XD

"I can't screw her so I'll think of her with a mustache! Now I feel better!"

You guys are proving my point for me and I'm sitting here cracking up XD

[BellePepper]

@WhatAreYouReading Thank you so much for saying so! <3

[ConsultantIsBack]

Lol strong inferences

No offense, you seriously have the logical reasoning skills of a nine year old lol

[BellePepper]

@ConsultantIsBack I'm just saying what you guys have already said. "Its just simply a matter of attraction." and "It's not insecurity, just attraction"

If you don't like the way it sounds, maybe you should not say it ;)

[ConsultantIsBack]

Are you a Trump supporter by chance lol

[BellePepper]

@ConsultantIsBack So mean!

[BertMacklinFBI]

if they're referencing her behavior then yeah, if they're referencing the way she looks, then its that.

[Asker]

Behavior. What are some specific examples?

[BertMacklinFBI]

i guess things you normally see more acceptable from a guy, like clobbing down a triple cheese like the world is ending tomorrow. belching really loud after a beer. scratching your ass. etc.

[Mesonfielde]

I only say that if their face is too pointy and too oval.

[Asker]

Huh?

[Mesonfielde]

I mean this
static.tvfanatic.com/.../...-sliwinska-picture.jpg

[Applefan1]

Some men don't like it when women play video games, like cars, have jobs that normally men do and all those sorts of things. Some men even take it as far as to when a woman farts and say women should not fart because that is a masculine thing to do.

[Applefan1]

I personally would rather a woman did whatever job she loves and if she needs to fart around me she is most welcome to as farting is only natural for women to so I don't judge women for doing it even if it stinks bad. :)

[Bluefish]

A woman who shaves her face, drinks beer on the couch with her hand in her crotch, burps out loud without saying sorry, doesn't mind playing a rough sport with the boys... basically a female homer simpson.

[Anonymous]

If they are referring to her behavior, as you state, then it could be she likes fast cars; watches Formula 1 etc... doing what society seems to have deemed as "guy" things.

However, I've not heard guys call women masculine; however if I were to do that then it would only be in regards to her looks... that she looked like a man and thus extremely unattractive

[SarahsSummer]

Muscular comes usually to mind.
But if you're talking about behaviors maybe being loud, aggressive or boisterous.

[Anonymous]

Would it be weird to have sex with a masculine woman? I mean she probably would have lots of stamina and strong legs perfect for reverse cowgirl

[Asker]

Well, you can have sex with anyone who is legal and willing.

[Byakuyarko]

When men call women "too masculine"... it can mean 1 of 2 things:
1. the bitch has a penis
2. they are too much of a pussy to appreciate women with a little steel in their spines

[CoolSky01]

if she acts like a guy.

[Asker]

What are specific examples of "acting like a guy" though?

[CoolSky01]

being too pushy, acting tough, being bossy, getting physical and wanting to be the leader of whatever group she's in, always tries to stand out in a group and attempts to come on top, talking about guys and commentng on guys passing by as if she's so cool and thirsty... thats so uncool, aggressive girls who have a "strong character" are waht most guys find a turn off, iam not saying be weak and submissive but acting like i said doesn't improve your chances at all...

[Anonymous]

:( did someone said you were masculine?

[Asker]

No, I got the idea from a different question I saw on here today.

[ThatBritishLad]

When they have hair on their face.

[TheOldMan59]

lesbian

[Asker]

What if she's a "femme" lesbian?

[TheOldMan59]

Then she's unlikely to be called masculine :)