What do you think of career driven independent women?

[ElissaDido]

[Phoenix98]

If I'm being completely honest I'm kind of weary of the whole career driven independent woman thing. Don't get me wrong I support women have the opportunity and the choice to work if they want to or not and being independent is fine I guess I mean your a person an individual.

But I don't want to be with someone who puts their work and career above our relationship and our family. And I've noticed that a lot of these kinds of women don't tend to have friends but often neglect family life for a later date or just quiet a bit in general. Among other things.

But I grew up in traditional household, I mean my mother had a degree, went to college and all that but she choose to be a stay at home mother she liked it better then working. And my father worked so I am used to enjoy that close family unit and that kind of relationship with my mother that I wouldn't have with her now. If she was gone all the time and I was put in daycare or put with a stranger at home.

And I am a very, very big family oriented guy and family man so it's important to me to have a spouse that puts family first and doesn't neglect them or leave them behind to further her career, I won't have none of that. But if she can balance those two worlds then power to her.

I've also been burned by this kind of woman before and the relationship when this was happening and the end was not an enjoyable experience I wish to reenact for the rest of my life.

So I have no issues with a woman working or being independent I suppose but if she wants to be with me she's going to have to be able to balance that new age career driven independent woman thing or the traditional household role I was raised with. If she can do that even a little bit then we'll be fine, but I will not be with someone that does the above mentioned to her husband or children, I don't want that for myself and I don't want it for them.

[FakeName123]

Am with you on that one. Being "independent and career-driven" is a huge red flag for where her priorities are. There is definitely a fine line between being capable of handling yourself and having aims in life to being obsessive with achievements.

[Phoenix98]

@FakeName123 I wasn't necessarily talking about the OP I mean I know she cares deeply for family and being traditional so she is kind of an exception to the rule. but I was just talking about career driven independent women in general.

[FakeName123]

"her" was used as a general statement and not directed to anyone

[Phoenix98]

@FakeName123 O ok gotcha, wasn't sure exactly what you had meant thought you were talking about the OP.

[FakeName123]

No biggie. Sometimes when writing fast in English I accidentally slip 1:1 translations in it that make sense in german but aren't exactly clear in English.

[Ydude]

This should be MHO , is , good answer

[Phoenix98]

@FakeName123 No worries.

@Ydude thanks man.

[Anonymous]

that they really aren't that independent and career driven seeing most of them get into high professional careers to get very close to rich/financially well off men so they can get pregnant and then take a back seat on their career to raise the kid.

#UNDERCOVER GOLD DIGGING.

[ElissaDido]

So no matter what we do we are gold diggers?

[Opinion Owner]

Not saying all of you are gold diggers but a lot of women who call themselves independent ultimately are still looking to get knocked up by a well off man and not have to work.

Example:

know a girl exactly like this too. Went to a good university, went into investment banking and two years later got pregnant twice to a managing director, and is now a stay at home mom. She was pretty, and she knew what she was doing. Can't fault it really

A lot of women tend to use their job like status symbols and accessories. They don't take it that seriously and position themselves so they can get knocked up by a guy who is rich and then become stay at home moms.

[redeyemindtricks]

Dude, young investment bankers work 100+ hours a week, and have literally NO LIFE outside of work. Hell, they even try to live as close as possible to the bank, just so they can get a little extra sleep.

I mean... OK sure, *maybe* it was all an insidious plot to marry a "higher-up" guy.
But, I wouldn't just assume that, when there's a simpler explanation: Where *else* would this woman reasonably have met a husband, if she didn't already have one?

[Opinion Owner]

@redeyemindtricks 1) How about checking out the entire world population of men who aren't investment bankers that live in her geographical location? 2) Gym 3) Hobbies/Clubs

[Opinion Owner]

@redeyemindtricks Also young investment bankers work between 70-100 hrs depending. 100 is upper limit.

Investment bankers usually start quite late (because they finish late), at around 9.30am or even 10am.

[Opinion Owner]

They finish around 12:30 am on average and this is only for weekday. There free during weekend mostly. Plenty of time to go out and meet people.

[redeyemindtricks]

... but what point are you trying to make?
She's around the other people at the bank for A HUNDRED HOURS A WEEK!
So... if she's going to meet someone by pure random chance, then, overwhelmingly, that person is going to be someone from the bank.

I mean... Are you actually trying to say that she should have purposely cultivated a relationship outside the bank -- with what very little "free" time she had to do so -- just for the sake of verifying to random outside strangers that she isn't a "gold digger"?

If that's what you are implying, then... well... that's weird.

If you AREN'T trying to imply that, then, if you spend more than 80 percent of yr waking hours somewhere... just think about the overwhelming probability of encountering yr future spouse there.

__

by the way
70-100 hrs is if they're working at a "lifestyle" bank. If they're at Goldman or Morgan Stanley, at least back in the last decade (when I knew more NY'ers than I do now)... definitely triple-digit hours, week in week out.

[Opinion Owner]

@redeyemindtricks 1) She does not have very little free time. She has plenty of free time

2) She should. Settling and limiting your mate choice to your work enviroment is true and true settling and not actively picking the person you want to be with.

3) Seeing the time for investment bankers is so high having 2 partners with long working hours is not a viable options.

4) You are wrong again. Those are the wroking hours for GOldman.

news.efinancialcareers.com/.../working-hours-investment-banks

[cheeseysouffle]

Most people find the idea of them admirable but don't actually like them. Most guys don't want to butt heads with someone who is independent. They want a woman who needs them. An independent woman doesn't need anyone. She just wants to be with them. She loves their company and loves them as a person. Most guys want a woman to have some sort of dependency on them. It's not a bad thing. It just is.

Career driven women tend to have friends, but they put their family life off for a later date. Most people don't tend to think that is acceptable in society.

[alor1an]

that's all fine and dandy as long as you aren't bashing people that choose to stay at home. it's nobody's business what other people do, but too many feminists want to act like staying home is a problem.

[ElissaDido]

Agreed

[YaBaba]

Some are too extreme about it that they don't care for their family.
As in prioritizes career over family and I don't like that.

[Cosytoasty]

Femin... nvmd no :P

I like the career part, i tolerate the independent part. I think men and women complement each other. We don't rely on each other but neither can we do without each other.

[Miezko]

I think of it as interdependence.

[FakeName123]

Definitely a turn-off. Many women who say they are career-driven and independent just have their priorities in a way that it doesn't align with what I want in a woman.

Having a drive and wanting to do something with your life is all good and nice, but the majority of career-driven women are just obsessed with their career and forget whats really important. And most importantly they forget to actually live life.

[Bandit74]

It seems like most girls identify as "strong independent career women" so honestly it's just normal.

[Djaaaaaay]

I think there great in many ways. Being independent both male and female , gets rid of the needs of society. Rather they both express a want to be together instead. The attributes of this manner are incomparable to societies stupid ass traditional ways.

[Yumix]

Good... At least one of us not fucking up their career

[Centerino]

They're my type of woman because they don't require my constant attention and don't need to rely on me for anything.

[Anonymous]

Very bitchy, unattractive, feminist, slutty and hypergamous. Usually marriages with independent women end up in divorce. To me and my friends we want women to be feminine like house wife where the woman is submissive which is attractive and very womanly.

[Maik567]

I don't mind girls who are career driven, but when it comes to dating I wouldn't want to date someone who always put her career before our relationship or family.

[MrAtticusLebowski]

Career driven people usually put they're career first and everything else second.

What comes to mind is a women that has no time for a committed relationship.

[Anonymous]

Once they get there they go Fuck now what. I'm never going to be able to do anything fun now. I wasted my youth getting here and rejected every guy so I could focus on getting here. I can't be young and stupid any more.
Thus cugers are born.

[ElissaDido]

Career driven doesn't mean no life

[Opinion Owner]

Well all of the women that I know that are career driven independent women don't want a life. It distracts them from their goals. Now a career driven women usually has a life. The very independent people usually don't. That just seems like the way it is in college.

But seriously out of the 5 women and 3 men that I know who have made it. Don't know what to do with themselves next. They are on top and they can't see what to do next.

[hotstuffSRD]

I don't know
I mean it depends like if i have a girlfriend who's career driven then I'd be happy for her but she should manage time between me and her career though to most career driven women career is more important than lovers

[LittleMissCuriousity]

I think they're judged harshly, in my society. I think they're amazing!

[Oram52]

Ambitious independent woman is definitely somebody I'll settle down with.. BUT which comes first her career or relationship.

[anonman32]

i like independent women. and about the career part, thats means that they mean business which is good as long as the relationship does not suffer under it.

[Svengodofman]

I don't mind people being career driven, but I'm a family man myself so I really want a woman who also puts family first. I don't want to end up like the father in "Cats in the Cradle"

[Omar5881]

Some of them don't care about anything except themselves only and fuck anything else ( some of them )
But it's always nice if the woman can balance between her career and other aspets of thier lives

[Miezko]

I think of cold gray dismal days. Like a never ending rainy November.

[TheOneLol]

If they are married to their work then I think of the same what I think of guys like that. A waste of human life :(

[NajemEddine]

ambition is good
but where is my place in your world
if you can t find time to be with me dont waste my time

[DeadBattery]

She will think "oh, why don't I have a child" in her late thirties and it will be somewhat late.

[ElissaDido]

Why late? Many women have kids in their late 30's

[DeadBattery]

There becomes a huge time gap between the kid and the mom. I am speaking from own experience. When the kid hits the legal age, the mom gets to be at the age of a grandmother.

[Tanisha69]

Everyone is different. If you don't like those kind of women don't date them!

[lifeisbeautifulxoxo]

I'm a career driven independent woman I love my life and I encourage women to follow their dreams.

[Ydude]

It depends on ones definition of a career driven independent woman

[Sabretooth]

it shows proper raising... so long as her like doesn't revolve around her work.

[JamesDylan1990]

I'd love it if my girlfriend was rich and determined but alas lol

[Anonymous]

its normal.. women *should* be like that..

they dont need to be patted on the back for doing something normal to move forward in life

[Anonymous]

If by "career driven" you mean "career-obsessed" then I would think she wouldn't have time or necessity to spend time with me, otherwise if you just mean ambitious that's good.

[Mustachekitteh]

Someone who really wants to go for their career.

[Laura_Marx]

ugh.

wages for housework!

[Hidden_P]

What do I think?
"Carry on"

[thewho1975]

thats cool nothing wrong with ambition!

[Zzzzzz111]

They rock plus they're sexy af

[Alex88F]

i'd clap my hands to them

[Anonymous]

They're smart and successful

[SarahsSummer]

Happy for them.

[Princeofanons]

That's great

[Dingsbums]

I like them

[gobsmacked3]

Fully supportive

[TonyRyanAgain]

Luv em!

[Anonymous]

Good for them...