Why would a girl I rejected, spread a rumor to everyone at work that I rejected her?

[Anonymous]

At work, i know this girl at the reception for the last 2 years and a month ago she approached me and asked me out on a date. I rejected in a polite manner away from everyone and told her that i am not willing to be in a relationship because i am committed to my work and post graduate studies. I told her that i appreciate her coming up to me. Everything was going fine until people started acting weird to me at work... especially the other women and know they feel like i hurt her... i don't understand what i did wrong?

[ManOnFire]

This ALSO is something I've talked about. She didn't like that you weren't interested, and that bothered her. When women have a problem with someone, especially someone they work with, it's not at all uncommon for them to try to poison other people against you, especially other women. I've been in the same boat before. Women like that try to make themselves feel better about the situation by trying to get as many people - mostly other women - on their side as possible. They have to diffuse their insecurity somehow, and really end up demonstrating immaturity and an inability to deal with others.

[Asker]

That is really sad. Like i tried my best to be as polite and humble to her as possible, now the other women at work think I like "raped" her... they look at me like i have a disease. I have actually taken this week off from work. What should i do?

[ManOnFire]

You need to bounce back and get back to work. Don't show fear or anxiety. That's usually what women like that enjoy seeing. They get satisfaction out of knowing that they got to you. Whatever she told the other women, is probably exaggerations. Women will take a story and alter it so badly far from what really happened that people can really be deceived by it. Like I said, they have to do this to try to appear as victimized as possible so they can have support. Don't let her win by lying down.

[Asker]

Thanks man. I will go back, but i can't believe how all the other women just assumed that what they heard was true. Its so sad that they work like this in a professional environment. I appreciate the advice, thanks :)

[ManOnFire]

No problem. It's easy to believe because women will stand by and support other women even when they're wrong. They like this sisterhood thing of banding together against a guy, yet will prefer to have male friends cuz they say we're less drama! Lol.

And when you go back, act normal, like nothing ever happened. Like you're your regular cheerful self. You don't have to talk to her or the other women anymore - in fact I wouldn't - let that be a message to them that you know what's going on. But continue to be professional and friendly with the other people you work with.

[Asker]

I know, its so strange. I thought having women in the work force will be pleasant, but man can they be catty and sly (not all tho). That is good advice, i will be my usual professional self... why should i let them make me feel guilty for something i never did.

[ManOnFire]

Exactly. Don't let it disrupt your life. I personally don't like working with too many women, and almost every man I know has said the same thing, but it is gonna happen sometimes. You just have to be prepared and be in the know on how to deal with them. Good luck, man. Give 'em hell.

[Asker]

I guess so. I just don't understand why they behave like this in a professional environment. Yea, thank you so much man. I'm feeling much more confidant after talking to you. I sure will give 'em hell ;)

[Anonymous]

You got involved with a co-worker. That's what you did wrong. Right or wrong, gossip goes on.

[Asker]

i never got involved with her, she came out of the blue and approached me? Please explain how i was wrong

[Opinion Owner]

ew... Sorry... misunderstood. She was a vicious scorned bitch then.

[Anonymous]

Well, it's not a rumour if you've done it. She probably just is relatively close with people at work. The way you described it, you must have been very polite. I think there shouldn't be a reason to worry about. Everyone gets rejected once in a while.

They'll eventually get over it.

[Asker]

Sorry, i used the wrong word there. Yes, i did reject her in the best possible way i could. She went and told all the other women in my department and now almost the whole company knows that i rejected her and for some reason, they seem to look at me like i'm a bad person.

Thanks :)

[Opinion Owner]

No no, don't worry! :) Do you have a lot of women in your department though?
Maybe she just had a crush on you and was disappointed. I guess everything will work itself out...

[Asker]

Thanks. Yea, i felt bad, but i tried my best to reject her without hurting her feelings. Yea, most of my department is made up of women. I don't understand why they would not understand my side. Anyway, i guess i just got to be professional and stay quiet for a while. Thanks

[Smmyskittles]

Woman's ego couldn't' take a hit!

From what I've read, it sounds like she spread a bad rumor about how you rejected her? Saying you probably weren't the nicest?

If so, better off without that crazy.

[EllieLexis513]

I don't understand how it's a rumor if you actually did what she said.

[Asker]

i used the wrong word, sorry. I meant why would she go tell everyone i rejected her

[FashionQueen86]

Women like to talk, talk, talk about everything. That's why it got out.

[Anonymous]

Maybe she had a crush on you for a long time and they supported you. You most likely didn't do anything wrong but this is how life works.

[Anonymous]

It's not a rumor if it's true lol

[Asker]

i used the wrong word, sorry. I meant why would she go tell everyone i rejected her

[John_Doesnt]

Because she's a girl and girls are petty.

[AriadneSky]

guys do the same thing. if you resect them they tell their friends they rejected you and you took ti badly.

some people are ridiculous but you can not seriously think the is limited to a sex. that would be ridiculous. dont be one of those ridiculous people.

[John_Doesnt]

@AriadneSky no we don't.

[scooogy]

Had that as well, those girls are insane.

[TonyRyanAgain]

She's just salty, lol. Ignore and move on.

[Anonymous]

She can't handle rejection