Is being busy an attractive quality in a partner?

[lmw123]

Is being busy an attractive quality in a partner?

[Canadaman99]

Not really. If you are busy and thus unavailable why should I waste my time? On the flip side of that, if you are never busy because you have nothing to do ever (rather than our schedules lining up so you are always available when I am or some other freak coincidence) that would be a red flag

[lmw123]

See my example below:

I told the guy I’m talking to. I’ve been studying non-stop for my licensing exam and I’m busy right now with that. He also likes his alone time.

What about this?

[Canadaman99]

What kind of lisence is it and I love my alone time, I'm a huge introvert. But I do want to spend time with other people and if I'm interested in someone they will be practically the only person I'll want to spend time with outside of my alone time

[lmw123]

Mental health counseling. I texted him he didn’t say anything so I guess he is fine with it

[Canadaman99]

He ignored you or didn't complain? And that's reasonable. If you said your driver's license I'd have said you are just making an excuse not to see him lol

[lmw123]

He didn’t write back. But he does that sometimes.

[Canadaman99]

Did he see the text?

[Canadaman99]

Or are you legit texting so can't know

[lmw123]

It got delivered he saw it. His phone was dead when I sent it. I don’t need a response.

[Bmick57]

I think it depends. It's one thing to stay active and to always be working on or towards something. It's something entirely different when someone doesn't know how to manage their time and they end up not giving enough attention to anything.

[lmw123]

No I’m studying for my licensing exam. I sent him a text saying I would be busy studying. I didn’t get a response. I assume he just read it and was like ok I’ll let her be.

[Bmick57]

This is something I get in trouble with in the women in my life. From someone I'm dating to my mother or sister. I generally tend to only respond to questions or open statements. If you sent me that text, I would interpreted it as a statement on your part that didn't require any further input from me. There have been times when women have asked me why I didn't respond and my answer is usually, "I didn't think it needed a response."

[lmw123]

Got it. Makes sense. Now I won’t panic 😭

[bellybuttonlint]

Not TOO busy... but as long as you are legit busy and not trying to be busy so that "absence makes the heart grow fonder" and all that jazz I think it's attractive.

I don't want my girl clubbing and going to spas everyday.

[Miristheiss]

No, not really. I guess you'd have to elaborate more as to what that means, give me a scenario to follow your train of thought?

[lmw123]

I told the guy I’m talking to. I’ve been studying non-stop for my licensing exam and I’m busy right now with that. He also likes his alone time.

[Miristheiss]

I don't know if I'd label it as attractive but I would admire how hard you are working and your dedication to succeeding. I'd respect it.

[lmw123]

Yea he didn’t say anything to the text. Do you think that just means he saw it and is letting me study?

[Miristheiss]

It doesn't really have to mean anything. I don't know the context of the conversation. Was he asking you to get together and you said no, I have to study? I don't necessarily think you need to try and read anything into him not responding back. He may have just read it as you giving him and FYI or updating him as to what you were up to. Sometimes I text right back, sometimes I may take a few hours if I'm busy or not checking my phone very often.

[lmw123]

No we hadn’t spoken in a few days. Just wanted to let him know why.

[random56286]

Yes as long as it is productive and not hectic or frantic

[ggg___]

Yes, it shows that you are productive and making an impact.

[lmw123]

I sent him a text saying I was busy studying for a while. I didn’t hear back. Do you think he read it and was like ok I’ll let her be?

[ggg___]

It's okay but unless you also showed some form of interest in your message he now thinks that you want to be left alone.

[cancan73]

Yeah 👍

[Spacepope]

no. not really.