Never had a girlfriend. I guess I will die alone?

[HypnoticGuerilla]

Well... I'm sure there are tons of guys who have the same problem with me... As you guessed so : I'm so shy , not self-confident, loser about girls... As far as I figured out, the reasons of that are my anti-social life and can't know what to talk with people ( not only girls ) plus I feel as if I was so ugly and looking weird.

Therefore, I've never had a girlfriend in my life and had only a few good friendships. So, I can say that my heart is virgin as my d*ck ( OK , I know. It was a bad joke. Sorry :))

Well... I've not pushed my limits to solve the problem but I need some advice and helps from you. Especially the advice of girls... Because, they know guys better than they know themselves.

Thanks all...

[sewn2gether]

i would suggest getting involved in things where you can meet people.. like the previous answer, volunteering could be a good idea. I would highly suggest getting involved in things that you're really interested in - you will be most confident around other people when doing things that you enjoy. Even if you don't meet someone that you're interested in or that is interested in you, you'll still learn more about girls and people in general.

confidence is key, I'm working on it myself. It's a matter of being confident even if sometimes you feel as though you don't have reason to be. Ultimately, you do. Sure, guys with great looks have the advantage here, but I've seen plenty of guys that a girl wouldn't call "hot" get tons of girls because of their confidence.

first of all, don't try too hard. and for heaven's sake, don't ever apologize to girls because you think you're being to pushy or bothering her. I've had guys do that to me when they're trying to chat me up at the bar and it just makes them look more pathetic. the reality is, in many cases, girls will be more attracted to you if you don't show overwhelming interest in them. that's not to say you don't talk to them, or show mild interest - just don't over do it.

it's sort of a delicate balance but the main thing to remember is to approach girls with a positive attitude, don't be afraid. You're going to get shut down sometimes, accept it, make a joke out of it, whatever you want to do to make yourself feel better, but don't get discouraged. and please don't drown a girl with attention, if she isn't interested, give her space. If you're particulary interested in her, make small advances here and there, test out her responses, pull back when necessary, act like a friend if you need to.

I personally am more attracted to guys who don't give off the impression that they are pursuing me. Let relationships develop naturally. but at the same time you have to be willing to take risks to get what you want. risk-reward. that's life.

ultimately, if you're looking for someone to be really serious about, don't try to play games or be cool, just be yourself. I hate when people say it, but its true - if someone doesn't like you for who you are then don't waste your time on them.

finally, although looks are NOT the main factor in relationships (trust me, I've dated some not-so-good-looking guys, and I liked them the same as the hot ones), it won't hurt to clean yourself up a bit if you're unsatisfied with the way you look. Find a style you like, trim those eyebrows, whiten them teeth. But don't beat yourself up over it.

hope this helps!

[Anonymous]

You're right in saying a lot of guys (and a lot of girls, I'm a girl and have had confidence issues in the past) have issues with confidence expecially around the opposite sex. It seems like you really want to get close to girls and usually the best way is through friendship. This may not be easy if you are not aorund girls much but you need to do whatever it takes to make more female friendships.ie. take up a sport volunteer in something...You may meet girls who you like as friends but don't want to date but you should be as friendly to them anyway who knows who you could meet through them?

If you have severe problems in talking to everyone in everyday life again like many young people you should consider counseeling/assertiveness training. It sounds like you are very hard on yourself and you may feel that you are ugly but it is up to you to be your own friend and make the best of yourself, I'm sure there are some great things about you that you haven't menioned because you see your flaws first. Calling yourself ugly won't help you feel better, focus on your good qualities, everyone has lots of hidden potential inside.

What you said about your heart being virgin is interesting the physical side of relationships is not half as intimidating as the emotional side so remember when you do meet someone you like to take care of yourself still. Don't be afraid to take a chance on someone and don't be hard on yourself if it doesn't work out. Every little step you take in making friends, developing yourslef etc is key, I really hopr things work out good for you and taht you don't feel patronised by my advice. Remember lots of girls are very shy and sensitive and would love someone like you! Lots of girls have met mr wrong and are longing for someone different!

[flower1000]

thats why your not getting a girl becouse your feeling like that it ahows on the face and body so start thinking better of yourself a lot of people think like you you must think better of yourself were no all super models love but we try make the best of our selfs smile at girls catch the eye slight smile shave nice perfume on hirls love that no 1 is ugly there is always some 1 for some 1 your only 21 don't worrie if your really want to have sex untill you get a girlfriend go to a massage parlor get it over with

[thisGUYknows]

hey I was I shy, confidence lackin dude at one time. friends and even movies helped me realize that obviously what I was doin with girls wasn't working. you gotta take chances. I'm sure you've seen guys who are decent looking at best or even worse lookin than you are yet they have plenty of girlfriends. confidence goes a long way my friend so you gotta slap that "die alone" sh*tty attitude out yourself. what chick wants to be with a guy with a loser attitude? no one is born a ladies man, ya being good lookin helps but even players have to start somewhere. you gotta get out of your shell somehow and take chances. it might start off slow but even the longest journeys start with a single step. sounds corny but its true. in a year or so from now do you wanna have at least made more friends and know a girl or two or do you wanna be at square one still? get mad at yourself damnit and do somethin about it! if your friends have that lame ass attitude too then they ain't gonna help. broaden your horizons and at least make more guy friends. that alone with give you more opportunities to meet their friends who are girls. and remember, girls are people too not a different species. talk to them like you would any other person. and if they're a bitch, f*** em. don't talk to them anymore. defeat can't and shouldn't stop you from trying again with someone else.

[GIntrovert]

All girls will tell you, is to pretend to not be you.. (from experience)

If you want to find someone, go to a dating website...

[Anonymous]

Um...have you looked at this site?Im a girl and I can truly say that most girls don't seem to know much about how guys work.If they did,this site would be plastered with..."Does he like me?"and "How can I get him back?" and "Why didn't he call me?" questions! Haha...Just had to get that out of the way. You will find someone wen it's time. All you can do now,is work on improving yourself and your social life. Your confidence,the full nine.Im 26 and I haven't had a real relationship yet.Yeah it doesn't feel all too great,but I know it's because I have high standards.And I refuse to settle for less.My standards aren't too high,but they are reasonable definitely. Be socialable,kick any negative energy if you have that going on,and try and stay optimistic about it.You will ,meet some amazing person...its just a matter of time.

[emilyzenella]

You're not going to die alone! your still young! The only thing I KNOW is that no girl will love you unless you can love yourself first. SO work on that- get a haircut/dye, get as clean looking as possible, get a new wardrobe that looks good, smile every once and a while, just be nice to people and you'll start to make friends who can introduce you to girls. Also, try getting a hobby that will make you feel great about yourself. Guitar is a good one. girls like that. I know ;)

[emzy-89]

you're in the 18-24 age bracket...how could you possibly think that it's all over for you? lol. your life is just beginning. I'm 21 and never had a boyfriend. most people who have had 'boyfriends' 'girlfriends' but our age have only been child 'relationships' so you could hardly call them significant.

[loveforthelights]

sweetie don't change for anyone

be yourself if a girl don't like it then she's not the one for you

youll find the one your still young its going to take time =] just wait it out ;]

[TheCheshireCat]

Dude, seriously, you 21, I think you still have time. Don't become a monk yet...

[JoseeBaby]

Just give it sometime and be patient :) Work on your social skills and the girls will be all over you! :)

[lily85462155]

awww you will find someone! you are still very young =] Try just being more positive and putting yourself out there. Remember the ladies loveee confidence! (:

[Anonymous]

i'm 22 and never had a boyfriend, so I know how you feel

[Dylan1989]

I love you. I'm 22 and I've never had a girlfriend. But I'm not self-conscious about it. I love my life. Never knew there were girls out there that had been single for so long.

[gummybear888]

you just haven't meant the right one yet.

[socalgamehater2006]

i'm glad I'm not alone

[Anonymous]

" EVERYTHING IS FATED ! "