Is it weird to tell a guy straight forward that you like him?

Question

A lot of friends told me that I shouldn't tell the guy I like that I like him "straight forward", and that I should flirt with him and wait for him to ask me out.

But I don't feel like waiting. He's kind of shy and I know that he probably won't take the first step himself.

What should I do, how should I tell him ?

Answer 1

Anonymous

Well, if you plan to confess that you are attracted him, you shouldn't do it in a flirty fashion. According to Miss Manners (the original one who wrote the humongous book in the early twentieth century), "The advantage of flirting is that neither party is answerable for any statements made. One might say, 'You are very handsome,' but the other party should not reply, 'what are you going to do about that?'"

The ambiguity and wordplay involved in flirting don't create an appropriate atmosphere for admitting love because the very essence of flirting is the doubt it creates about one's true intentions: the object is to entice the other party without committing oneself. If you're really interested in this guy, tell him so flatly, especially if he's shy.

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Milleah

+1 y
Thanks a lot ! I think I will. Should I tell him I like him, and then ask him out right of way ?
Opinion Owner

+1 y
Yes, definitely, but don't just say, "Will you be my boyfriend?" or "Will you go out with me?" If he's shy and low in self-esteem, he's probably afraid of getting into a relationship in which he can't hold up his end. Ask him something more specific, like "Will you go to the movies with me on Friday?" This should make him feel more confident (even the least self-confident person can probably see himself going to the movies once with a girl he likes), which will make him more likely to say yes.

Answer 2

Milleah

Thanks a lot ! I think I will. Should I tell him I like him, and then ask him out right of way ?

Answer 3

Opinion Owner

Yes, definitely, but don't just say, "Will you be my boyfriend?" or "Will you go out with me?" If he's shy and low in self-esteem, he's probably afraid of getting into a relationship in which he can't hold up his end. Ask him something more specific, like "Will you go to the movies with me on Friday?" This should make him feel more confident (even the least self-confident person can probably see himself going to the movies once with a girl he likes), which will make him more likely to say yes.

Answer 4

Icechip

Xper 5

I say ask him out. I doubt that he will ask you out, unless you drop some really big hints that you like him. Then you would wait the time it takes for him to get his courage. If he says no, that doesn't mean he doesn't like you its just he is nervous about talking about it and saying no is easier. Get to know him a little better and ask him in private so he doesn't feel pressure if he hesitates ask him if he wants some time to think about it. Don't feel bad if he says no, prob just cause he is shy especially around you cause you like him. I say go for it and good luck!

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Milleah

+1 y
Thank you ! I probably will but I'm planning on talking to him a few more days to make sure that I'm not missing a proof that he doesn't like me, you know ?

Answer 5

Milleah

Thank you ! I probably will but I'm planning on talking to him a few more days to make sure that I'm not missing a proof that he doesn't like me, you know ?

Answer 6

minnimouse

Xper 5

Please, if you think it's right and you're brave enough to tell him, just do it! You have nothing to lose if he doesn't like you back and everything to gain if he does. I wish I had as much courage to have told the guy I like that I did like him... Be spontaneous. Catch him when he least expects it, and then tell him up front. He'll be flattered at the very least. Good luck! :)

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1 Person

Milleah

+1 y
That's what I was going to do before my friends started making me insecure about it. It's the first time I'm actually going to ask someone out face to face, so I don't know how I should say it, and if he likes me back, should I ask him out right the way or wait a few days ? I feel clueless.
minnimouse

+1 y
Hmm...I know how you feel. If he doesn't really know or have an idea that you like him, try flirting it up a little bit to let him know you're interested and see how he reacts. If he reacts positively, go for it! If he seems a little hesitant, don't let that get you down. Maybe he just wants to get to know you better.
Milleah

+1 y
I will ! Thanks for your advice, I'll let you know how it went...

Answer 7

Milleah

That's what I was going to do before my friends started making me insecure about it. It's the first time I'm actually going to ask someone out face to face, so I don't know how I should say it, and if he likes me back, should I ask him out right the way or wait a few days ? I feel clueless.

Answer 8

minnimouse

Hmm...I know how you feel. If he doesn't really know or have an idea that you like him, try flirting it up a little bit to let him know you're interested and see how he reacts. If he reacts positively, go for it! If he seems a little hesitant, don't let that get you down. Maybe he just wants to get to know you better.

Answer 9

Milleah

I will ! Thanks for your advice, I'll let you know how it went...

Answer 10

thisGUYknows | 214 opinions shared on Girl's Behavior topic.

Yoda

YOU CAN DO IT! sometimes playing games and dropping hints is fun but every guy is different. if he's a shy guy like you mentioned, then he could be thinking of a way to approach you about dating and not sound dumb. it will make it a lot easier for him if you did tell him. screw waiting for him. so many possibilities are wasted when girls "wait" for a guy to ask them out.

as for telling him, just say "hey your cute/handsome" or whatever. it doesn't have to sound so serious. make eye contact and smile. even if it makes you blush. he should get it

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Answer 11

iamwhatsup123

Xper 3

Don't tell him straight forward you like him, instead tell him you want to hang out more often. Or you should be more touchy with him like sitting really close and grabbing his arm. tell him he looks good or smells good. after that he'll start to think you really like him and then ask him if he likes you. if he says yes then you hook up with him, but its sort of a turn off to say directly that you like him

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Answer 12

snackeyg

Xper 3

No it's awesome. Do it. Straight forward is a million times better than hints. Hints and waiting might not even work. Your friends are idiots.

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3 People

Milleah

+1 y
Alright. I probably will then, thank you!
snackeyg

+1 y
Yay! I didn't mean to sound mean on the friend thing, but on this topic they're being dumb. lol
Milleah

+1 y
That's kind of how I felt, I wasn't really getting my friends' point...