Why do guys on here want to kill themselves because they can't get a girlfriend?

[sweet_18]

Like seriously? Does your life suck that much?

I've been single all my life and believe me, I wish I could have a boyfriend really bad but ya know what? I don't want to kill myself.

[painisgood]

I fell hard for my first girl when I was 18. Her & I tried everything from public sex to bondage and I trained her to squirt...I actually got lots of sex when I was younger...I was on a roll...but I felt empty inside with every girl after my first love. I was missing something. That something was intimacy, trust, warmth and true empathy. I ended up totally getting off the loveless circus sex train at 25 and have been searching for someone amazing to give all my heart, mind and eros. I have had sex occasionally in the last 5 years with a good friend here and a good friend there...but nothing regular. And to be honest...the sex is mediocre at best...so I am indifferent. The sex is free & spontaneous and she never owns me, thus I stay an uncastrated free man.

I also feel that men who never had good sex can be satisfied with boring sex...but for a guy who tasted the best mind blowing sex...He becomes jaded fast...He then falls depressed. Give a 32 year old virgin a boring missionary girl and he'll never know better. For him she will be his best sex and he will be grateful...I wouldn't be satisfied with boring.

I also despise women who see themselves as "giving" sex as a favour they are making to men! Maybe women should simply be "having" sex with the men of their desire without trading for it...? Cause sex is supposed to be fun, right?

[Darkfaith]

I'm not sure if you have really noticed, but social commonplaces state that;

Girls with boyfriends - are loving and caring average girls.

Boys with girlfriends - happy, socially average guy.

Girl without boyfriend - Independant, work-committed.

Boy without girlfriend - Depressed, the reason why he is single is probably cause he is between girls and depressed, or weird and unable to get a girlfriend.

It's a trend that I have seen a lot of in friends, I'd love to have a girlfriend, have someone to share experiences with, talk to about what ever and spend you spare time with knowing that they want to be with you and know that you are wanted in this world. But sometimes life just doesn' pan out the way you had planned/hoped.

And in response, they wanna kill themselves becasue they don't have anything better going on in their lives, no post-school plans, no girlfriend, no job = nothing to live for, for those are the goals that western socitey is based around, and if you don't have one of those, people think you have made a wrong turn somewhere, and if you have none of them ... well, ill let you work it out.

[TheCheshireCat]

Yeah, I've read a couple of questions from different users who wanted to die because they didn't have girlfriends. There used to be a user who was so depressed, & wanted a girlfriend so bad, & there was no way you could open his eyes. He isn't on this site anymore, but I felt pretty bad for him.

I mean, I think it would be nice to have a boyfriend, but I'm not depressed because I don't have one. There is so much to live for, & many people have fulfilling lives while never getting married. Also, people who are depressed can't get better by getting a bf/gf. That is a lie they have convinced themselves of, that if they could just find someone, they could be happy. Depression is the problem, not the lack of significant other. Finding a girlfriend/boyfriend won't make you feel better, and you need to deal with the real problem.

[sweet_18]

EXACTLY!. took the words right outta my mouth. you're getting best answer.

[carlo]

I think it's abit different for a girl in that respect. In the sense that a girl who has not got a boyfriend is not seen as a loser overall, there is the assumption that she may be choosing to stay so. For us guys, if you haven't got a girlfriend, you're just a loser full stop, if you can't get laid or get a girlfirend it is not a guy's choice. There are exceptions of course but statistically is so.

[carlo]

@ sweet why are you single? Is that you the one in the pic?

[TheCheshireCat]

That's actually not true, when I tell people I've never had a boyfriend, they look at me like I'm a freak. It is just as hard for women, maybe harder because women are supposed to be about love & relationships. According to the world, that is not what men are about, so it would make sense if they didn't have a girlfriend.

[TheCheshireCat]

And that's another problem with men, they say they want a girlfiend, but what they really mean, is that they want a hot girlfriend. Men always go after the pretty girls, like you just did. If you really want a girlfriend that bad, stop going after the pretty ones, & go for the single women who don't get any attention because they are not what this world considers "attractive."

[carlo]

If they look at you weird maybe in my opinion is because they are thinking "come on dude, it's 2011, are you still one of the old school waiting for The One?".

The ones who want to get suicide are the ones who can't seem to get any p**** for their lives. I'm not patronizing them, I'm part of the same bunch

[TheEndlessRiver]

I'm going to say this. You're lack of maturity is abysmal, and this thread is filled with "things not to say to suicidal people: 101". I don't know who you think you're helping, but it sound much more to me like a circle jerk for yourself and like minded women.

Depression is crucial to approach without judgement and with actual empathy, not patronization. To simply and glibly invalidate their feelings will only continue to alienate them, and make them feel worse about themselves, which is kind of what leads people to kill themselves.

Also, for men I would suggest that because of different social pressures prolonged singleness (which means complete complete lack of intimacy from the other sex: no relationships, no one night stands, etc) is a contributor to the lack of self worth which accompanies depression.

To all men who are reading this, you are better to seek professional help and outright ignore the views expressed on these kinds of boards. For men being single for prolonged periods of time is treated like a social disease, you need someone who won't shame you for being single or tell you that the alienation you feel is invalid.

[Anonymous]

I've never read a question that anyone would kill themselves because they didn't have a girlfriend. I mean, I can't understand why it would be that big of a deal to have or not to have one. I mean as long as you have your family and friends that's all you need. You don't NEED anyone else to depend on. Suicide is easily pathetic in that type of situation, just saying.

[sweet_18]

I have read multiple questions and have talked to guys on here.

[mormollio]

I've seen at least 5 this past month.

[Opinion Owner]

Really? I'm on here like every day almost and I've been a member for over a year now. Wow, I guess I'm just not on at the right time

[darkknight1x]

link

[Opinion Owner]

That's really pathetic ^^ the link is ^^

[sweet_18]

Yeah that was one of the ones that got the most answers.

[SocietysBomb]

we are all a result of what weve thought, and our thought are results of what weve experience... we don't all have the same lives and same feelings so people deal with sh*t way differently.. I think this questions f***ed up (even tho you probably didn't intend it to be, it is)

[Tractorbeam]

Most men place far more importance on love and sex than women ever do, probably by a factor of 10. You can argue and disagree with that as much as like, but you can't dispute the facts.
For example, I can't think of one man I've ever met who walked out on a marriage. I could easily find thousands of women who did. A great number of those women couldn't even find a genuine reason why they divorced their husband.

A lot of men will feel empty, if they have no love life. Everything else in life doesn't seem so much fun any more.
It just gets to some more than it gets to others.

[carlo]

This is one of the most annoying thing, to get asked this question by the girls. You girls always complain you want guys to understand you, but you never seem to put effort into trying to really understand us. Does it bother you when he tries to understand you but he actually really doesn't get it, because in reality he's just not being able to get out of his point of view and reality. Same here, you just don't get it, and it's so f***ing annoying

[cyrus7]

I won't ever kill myself because of that, but it does hurt...

and I think it's a lot easier for a girl to be single because at least they get some compliments here and there, get checked out etc..

as a single (shy/insecure) guy it's like... no attention what so ever

[straightdope]

Some people are just desperate to feel affection. I'm desperate but I don't play the suicide card for attention because I know that won't get genuine love from anybody, just pity. I try not to judge other people that are desperate because I don't know how much worse they may have it than you or I. I have been shown almost no love during my life so I can definitely relate to the frustration.

[ladsin]

i think many guys are overreacting but it is true that single guys and girls are different.

three basic things that is almost instilled in all men is a want for power, money, and wife (hot). so when we don't get a girl, or for that matter have not ever had one we feel like are whole life is a failure because we aren't doing 'the manyly thing' so many people are shamed and feel that they should, now granted I think the people putting that on the enternet are probably just looking for attention

[AnonymousDude]

There's difference in being single with guys and girls

Example:

girls get compliments a lot by other single guys

guys don't get any, ever.

single life sucks more for guys than girls.But it's still not a good reason for suicide.

[vaporwave]

i want to kill myself because i dont know any girls and I've been single 3 years and can't see myself being in a relationship because its so difficult to meet someone and no one approaches me or talks to me so how am i supposed to meet someone, im also scared of rejection, i want someone just like me, i dont want someone with amazing looks that constantly talks to guys so il be scared to loose them or someone so ugly that i feel like shit everytime im with them. if i find someone il be truly happy and not depressed im just worried about the future.

[Still_here420]

Sexual health is an important aspect of health. Being constantly denied sex causes men to think that they are doing something wrong when attempting to impress a female, which they often are.

Go through enough rejection and your feeling of self worth is gone. Why continue living in a world that is just going to make you suffer?

[EddyMetal]

Not everyone who kills themselves does so because they think their life sucks.

link

link

[sadeyedwanderer]

wow. That "dead" swedish dude was pretty crazy. Suprised I never heard of him before.

[EddyMetal]

Yeah he was part of what led black metal to become such an extreme genre. Insane dude.

[johnblogs]

don't worry, you will eventually! you can't go your whole life being single and not eventually loose it. Well not if you are a guy anyway. girls are a bit different maybe. perhaps girls just want money, lol.

I'm 32 and still not had a girlfriend. Generally I do enjoy life but inevitably I get really depressed because of it. I have so far managed to get out of the depression but it always comes back and stronger each time.

It's only a matter of time before I disappear if I can't find a way to get a girlfriend. I am so amazed at how difficult it is for me and yet pretty much everyone else seems to have no problem with meeting people.

I try my best to stay alive but it's not easy. one day you will understand if you don't find anyone too.

[sadeyedwanderer]

I have thought about suicide before. But its because I have terrible self esteem issues. My penis is deformed and I have to sit to pee like a girl and I feel like a freak. I'm still a virgin cause I'm so embaressed and feel like no girl will ever want me or find me attractive. And I feel like what's the point in living if I can't ever be happy.

[shacodraco]

suicide is quite possibly the most selfish act anyone can ever commit. you have to think about what your family and people that love you will go through after you do it. you have to sit on the toilet to piss. so what? there are so many worse conditions than that. it might be hard for you but you need to stop the self pity and start doing things that will boost your confidence. like working out and grooming well.

[sweet_18]

Yes, thank you shacodraco

[Fckitall0099]

@shacodraco you know what i used to think that at one time, until my family and friends gave up on me. Not saying i never been with a women I've been with plenty but im tired of not being seen in a romantic light by most of them, by ones i want. Im sick of rejection. So fuck my family and friends, and all of the worthless bitches that rejected me. I plan to mainline a large quantity of heroin one day, if im gonna die im gonna die fucked up and hope it does hurt others. I hope they feel the pain i felt, i hope it germinates and festers within them. I hope they suffer as i did, i hope my death sends chills up their spines and i hope they off themselves too. They suicide affects everyone else well thats what i want, i want them all to suffer

[Cerigo]

Don't judge. We don't know what their lives are like or how they feel.

[turnpost]

Its because girls are just given affection guys have to earn it.

at least the ugly ones do. For ugly girls there just flat out ignored.

[cookiemonsterstar]

Lol this is sorta true in some respect

[JackieTreehorn]

HAHAHAHAHA. Aww man, poor Snackey.