Why do guys downgrade after leaving a decent girl?

[princess011]

Because this just happened to me. I did everything I could to make my relationship with him work. I tried to be there for him and be kind, despite the fact that he blew me off every weekend, blew off phone calls, practically ignored me at school, never texted or called just to say he was thinking about me, etc. Then he broke up with me because I stuck up for myself and wouldn't stand for his crap. And to top it all off, he's been spending time with a very atrocious-looking underclassmen girl with an annoying voice. I don't get it at all. Has this ever happened to anyone besides me? I just don't understand it.

We broke up about 4 weeks ago. About three weeks ago, he sent me a text message begging to still be able to talk to me, saying how "not hearing from me is killing him" and "he misses me, and thinks we should remain close because this seems too painful." I never responded. Is it a mistake to keep ignoring him? Will he try again? I really miss him, but I just don't know what to do anymore.

[Anonymous]

To you she may be ugly but to him she could be hot. Or, hell, she could just be putting out. Every one has different preferences, you clearly weren't what he wanted and he dropped you because of it. Get over it. You sound desperate and arrogant, neither of which are very attractive.

To you her voice is annoying but to him, it might not matter. I know a guy whose girlfriend's voice sounds exactly like Karen's from Will and Grace and I know I could never spend hours upon hours with her because of it. She's the sweetest girl you'll ever meet just... Her voice... But he doesn't care. He likes it.

We all have different points of view, some of them skewed, some of them not. Yours probably is because you're jealous. You want this guy to see how great you are but instead he's with some body else just wanting you for a wingman. So forget it, he sees something in her, he doesn't see it in you, let it go. That's all you can do 'else you just look like a fool.

As for friends, sure, if you can handle it, be friends, but if you can't, tell him the truth, it's too soon, and that you'll talk to him when you can be friends.

[Anonymous]

He obviously doesn't consider it a downgrade. Move on. "One man's trash is another man's treasure"

[Keats]

I agree with mshaker on this, usually when it comes to the split a lot of people don't give themselves time to be alone and think things over to themselves. Instead they latch on to the nearest thing that gives them attention.

Ignoring you and such is probably because he felt like he was being clung to and no longer had anything to chase, stupid as it sounds the chase is one of the most exciting things about a relationship. If someone is always calling and trying for your attention it feels like there's no work to be put in to earn back on.

Sadly I agree male attention span is a bit like a cat with a piece of string, if it just lays there It's not that interesting; yet if it starts dancing and moving away we'll lunge right after it.

From the text as well it sounds like he's regretting it from knowing what was there, best option is to steel yourself up, leave it and go on with things and see what's round the corner. Not going to lie, it'll hurt but it's worth it

[mshaker]

He downgraded because he hasn't had time to be alone.. When people leave one relationship to jump into another, normally the one after is always a downgrade.

My ex left me for some lump and doesn't drive, or have a steady source of income. But what can I say, If that's what floats her boat then so be it.

[Anonymous]

I think you can definitely win him back but you need to make it known that you still want to work things out with him, not ignore him. This girl can turn things around for you => link

[bhall20]

In all honesty it is probably not a downgrade. You just think it is a downgrade because you are insecure with your emotions and highly jealous of him. He played you, you fell for it, now you sit there and angrily judge his life. Get over yourself he dumped you, you are done. Move on and find another guy. There are plenty of them out there.

[princess011]

It definitely was a downgrade. I guess you would just have to see for yourself.

[Gregs]

you take what you can I guess