He always invites other people. Guys would you do this?

[Anonymous]

so whenever I ask my best friend to hang out or do something or go somewhere he always invites other people. I don't mind doing stuff with them they are cool guys but sometimes I just want it to be the two of us and I just don't understand why he does that like I will say just the two of us are going to _______, and he's yeah cool sounds good but then we get there and there are his friends. I don't know what I can do with out making him mad to make him realize that sometimes I want it to just be the two of us and not all of them.

[NightNinja]

It can be weird for a guy and a girl to do things together if they're not romantically involved. A guy can feel pressure to make things romantic and even though hanging out with a girl can be just like hanging out with a guy who has boobs there's something ingrained in us that makes us feel like it's strange. So we invite our friends to diffuse the awkwardness of going out with a girl, just the two of us.

With that said you guys are best friends so I find it strange that he can't hang out with just you. It's possible that he's trying to cover up some affection for you that might show itself when the two of you are alone. Or it could be the opposite and he thinks that because you want to spend time with just him there's something more going on, and he's bringing his crew to make sure nothing weird happens. Either way I would just say be honest with him, tell him you guys never get to hang out together, just the two of you and maybe tease him for always needing a group of friends in order to hang out with you. Maybe he will come around and realize that it's okay for a guy and a girl to hang out as a pair.

[Asker]

i know we are both very flirty with each other because that's just both of our personalities but he's talking to a girl currently and I'm talking to another guys so its not so much I think the romantic thing but I do like the idea of kinda joking with him because that might get it across better than just coming out and saying it because I know if I do that he will get mad at me and turn it around on me somehow about how I don't like his friends or something.

[NightNinja]

Yeah give it a shot, it's not about snubbing his friends and just hanging out with him, and I can tell you feel this way too. It's just harder to have a long conversation with someone when you're in a group than when you're one-on-one.

[Asker]

thats exactly it, like I am actually pretty close with him friends and I like hanging out with them but yeah I do like being able to have long conversations with him and I feel more comfortable around him and sometimes I do just want to talk and he's who I always go to but yeah its hard with his friends around because I'm not going to say what I really want to say to him when they are there

[Anonymous]

I would if I suspected you were trying to get me alone to have some talk about feelings you were having, and I didn't share them and I wanted to avoid an awkward conversation.

I also would, if I didn't think I could spend time alone with you and enjoy myself. Like, if you weren't actually my "best" friend, but if you thought we were "best" friends, then okay, cool. I wasn't going to dissuade you.

[Anonymous]

i think he invites other people because he doesn't have feelings for you and doesn't wanna give the wrong impression by being alone w. you

make it obvious that you don't like him like that and you just think of him as a friend

[AllDay]

Maybe he likes you and he doesn't want to do anything alone so to avoid making a move on you he has A LOT of guests but if you just want to hang out with him I would say you should ask him and tell him what's up

[Anonymous]

he thinks you like him and if he doesn't like you back, that can create an awkwardness, trust me. lol. if you do like him, and he doesn't like you back, don't push him, this will only irritate him

[Asker]

i don't have any feelings for him like that we are friends and only friends and I don't mind hanging out with his friends but every once in a while I want to just hang out with my best friend

[Opinion Owner]

like I said, if you like him. maybe he doesn't know you dont. its the fact that he thinks you do that would make it awkward. two best guy and girl "friends" can't hang out alone, its considered a "date"

[Asker]

i never said that he thought I liked him you just assumed that and what's wrong with my best friend being a guy?

[Opinion Owner]

i assumed he thought you liked him. which is usually the case with guys. and because lots of times girls will wind up liking their best guy "friend". and then one of you gets hurt, its not worth the pain, trust me..even if you don't like him, he might like you

[Asker]

well I know he is currently talking to someone else and he has had many girl friends before and I just don't get the impression that he likes me just from the way he is around me in comparison to the girls he does like, if that makes any sense...and he really is my best friend not my "friend"

[Opinion Owner]

hes a "friend" there's no such thing as a best guy or girl friend. that's why you have to put quotes on it and I've used that tactic of telling the girl I like about another girl I'm talking to, its a jealousy thing, just as a girl might talk to another guy and tell the guy she likes that she is as a jealousy tactic. sorry, sad truth

[Asker]

alright well the girl he is talking to is my friend so I know they are actually talking and why do you say there is no such thing and a best guy and girl friend

[Opinion Owner]

they might be "talking" but are they actually "talking"? you don't know that. lol, I "talk" to girls all the time, yet I have a girlfriend. I just happen to be naturally flirty :P

because as I said, one of them starts to like each other, why cause that kind of pain?

[Asker]

well we have been best friends for quite a few years now and never had a problem but whatever you can think what you want but I know our relationship and how things work

[Opinion Owner]

eh, itll come back and haunt you, trust me

[Asker]

well maybe you have been unlucky in the past and for all I know something might happen down the road but I'm not going to ruin a friend ship over something some guy said over the internet who doesn't even know me...

[Opinion Owner]

like I said. take my advice. learn from it and as you said "maybe something will happen on down the road" that means you do like him, I know you better than you think

[Asker]

when is said maybe something will happen down the road I was referring to your comment about how it was going to come back to bit me in the butt. I mean I'm so lucky to have a friend like him and I wouldn't change it for the world, he truly is just my best friend no matter what you think. people who know us know the truth and they understand others who don't may not get it just because they aren't in the situation that we are but I love that my best friend is a guy and I wouldn't want it any other way

[Opinion Owner]

lol you're defending him to a guy you don't even know, you must reallllly like him

[Asker]

whatever think what you want I know my feelings towards him...

[Opinion Owner]

and that's that you like him you just said "feelings" if you didn't like him uda said something like. I know he's my friend. too late now, you can't go back on your word

[Asker]

you sound just like one of my other friends he is convinced that I like my best friend

[Opinion Owner]

hes a smart guy, your friend. haha. you should listen to him, if your not gonna listen to me

[Asker]

you are a very persistent person aren't you

[Opinion Owner]

i know what I want, and I go for it. hence, why I'm trying to get you to see this

[Asker]

why do you want me to see this so badly, I don't understand

[Opinion Owner]

because I don't want to see you get hurt

[Asker]

but you don't even know me?

[Opinion Owner]

ur a human being on the other side of this computer. why would I want you hurt?

[Asker]

you seem like an extremely nice guy and seem to genuinely care about a complete stranger...and I do agree I don't want to see anyone hurt either

[Opinion Owner]

i shouldn't hate a complete stranger, I have no reason to. you should listen to a song called "wasting my hate" by metallica. I think it applies to me. I'm glad you agree, and are you gonna start to listen to both of us?

[Asker]

i don't know because I kinda understand why you guys would be saying that but at the same time I don't see my best friend as anything more than a friend...so to be completely honest its hard to say oh yeah you guys are right I like him when I don't really feel like that

[Opinion Owner]

u don't have to do anything about it. but just admit you like him, just so we can end this already

[Asker]

ok fine if it will make you happy I do kinda like him no I would never ever ever act on it though because I would never want to jeopardize our friendship

[Opinion Owner]

which is why I didn't want you hanging out with him by yourself. it makes it too awkward, id rather lose a friend than do that

[Asker]

but he doesn't know that I like him and right now you are the only one who knows, or who ever reads this...and its not like I act any differently that I typically do around him when we are alone or with people or the way I have for years

[Opinion Owner]

he may pick up on the fact you like him if you hang out or if you come off as flirty even when you hang out with friends. that's why he'd rather it be with friends than alone IF he doesn't like you and that's what it sounds like. it sounds like he doesn't want to make it awkward by not hanging out..alone

[Asker]

i guess I don't know really, I just about everything about him but I can't read his mind...

[Opinion Owner]

if girls could read our minds, thered be no "fun". haha. wheres the fun in "no fun"? ull be OK, just take what he gives u. would you rather not be friends with him and all or be friends and just go with the flow?

[Asker]

oh I have no problem at all with being just friends like as I said before I don't know what I would do without him so yeah I would be more than happy just being friends also I currently like someone else and have kinda been talking/hangin out with this guy, I don't know where its going but I really like him

[Opinion Owner]

cant like two guys at once. makes you a player, decide what you really want before liking someone, otherwise ull wind up breaking guys hearts and that's not a good thing

[Asker]

i know...

[Opinion Owner]

of course asking a girl what she wants is like shooting a blank gun. it just doesn't come out right

[Asker]

what do you mean?

[Opinion Owner]

if you ask a girl what she wants, she either lies or..ignores the subject. girls simply don't know what they want, they need to be shown

[Asker]

thats not necessarily true, I know what I want and I go for it but in this one situation I'm slightly torn

[Opinion Owner]

no. you can't say you know what you want and then say I'm torn between what I want. that's hypocritical. just say you don't know what you want in general. so we can end this already. lol

[Asker]

ok fine if it will make you happy I don't know what I want...

[Opinion Owner]

in which case, neither one of these guys know what theyre doing, otherwise theyda mad a move already. girls need to be shown what they want, and when a guy takes action, she loves it. hard to explain but you get my point

[Asker]

yeah...do you mind if I ask how old are u?

[Opinion Owner]

22

[Asker]

i figured you were pretty young I'm 18

[Opinion Owner]

well you certainly know how to flatter a guy. thanks for the compliment

[Asker]

what can I say its my specialty ha ha ;)

[Opinion Owner]

hey, add me. my username is www.girlsaskguys.com/samoht_D319

[Asker]

not going to lie I don't even know how to do that, I don't add anyone or do anything like that, I actually typically do everything anonymously...if you could tell me I might consider it :)

[Opinion Owner]

copy this into the url bar www.girlsaskguys.com/user/samoht_D319. if uve gotten to my profile after doing that, go to the left side of my profile and hit "add friend" then wait

[Asker]

i think I did it

[hALLDAY]

He's nervous about being alone with you. He might feel awkward in a one on one situation and may not know what to talk about.

[sikoo31]

never have, never would.

that's just weird.

you should just tell him straight up.

or stop inviting him to do things with you.

[foolycooly1001]

Tell him. If it makes him mad, stop wasting your time with him.

[Anonymous]

No, I wouldn't