So, I saw my ex yesterday and I feel great.
We broke up 2 years ago. And haven't seen each other since. I'm 29 and she's 36.
We had a fight in February, before the pandemic started and then by May '20 it was official.
She said that we shouldn't be in contact and I said it was ok. Months later our birthdays came. I ignored her on her B Day but she didn't on mine she wrote on my Fbook wall. Last year I did congratulate her and so did she. But that's it. We haven't talked or anything.
Now, yesterday I had to go pick up a document at the very same government office where we first met years ago. Now, there's a lot going on in my life, my mom got diagnosed with lung cancer, I can't find a job, have some family stuff to solve, it feels like the world is agains't me and this was a bittersweet but also an interesting surprise.
As I was getting in line to get this document, there she was, right infront of me, after 2 years of breaking up. She was wearing the very same pants she wore on our first date, a hoodie and a cap. My bag fell off my hand when I saw her and I made a funny noise, one she knows, when I picked it up she seemed "tense". She got her document and passed beside me turning her head awakwardly. I went to other line and I saw her walking away, but stopping, walking away and then stopping, until she left the building.
The thing is, the way she turned to "avoid me" was funny. It made me laugh. A normal person would just walk beside you and that's it. But how she turned her head and walked like a robot made me laugh after she left. Was she expecting me to talk to her? Did she even saw me?
I feel fine, I don't regret not talking to her, even though I wanted to say "Hey! what's up?", but after how things ended, I don't know. I'm open to talking to her again though.
Anyway, what do you girls think? I know this shouldn't matter. But, I wanted a girl's POV on this. We're still friends on Facebook, I have her whatsapp and we're still sub'd to each other on YouTube.
We broke up 2 years ago. And haven't seen each other since. I'm 29 and she's 36.
We had a fight in February, before the pandemic started and then by May '20 it was official.
She said that we shouldn't be in contact and I said it was ok. Months later our birthdays came. I ignored her on her B Day but she didn't on mine she wrote on my Fbook wall. Last year I did congratulate her and so did she. But that's it. We haven't talked or anything.
Now, yesterday I had to go pick up a document at the very same government office where we first met years ago. Now, there's a lot going on in my life, my mom got diagnosed with lung cancer, I can't find a job, have some family stuff to solve, it feels like the world is agains't me and this was a bittersweet but also an interesting surprise.
As I was getting in line to get this document, there she was, right infront of me, after 2 years of breaking up. She was wearing the very same pants she wore on our first date, a hoodie and a cap. My bag fell off my hand when I saw her and I made a funny noise, one she knows, when I picked it up she seemed "tense". She got her document and passed beside me turning her head awakwardly. I went to other line and I saw her walking away, but stopping, walking away and then stopping, until she left the building.
The thing is, the way she turned to "avoid me" was funny. It made me laugh. A normal person would just walk beside you and that's it. But how she turned her head and walked like a robot made me laugh after she left. Was she expecting me to talk to her? Did she even saw me?
I feel fine, I don't regret not talking to her, even though I wanted to say "Hey! what's up?", but after how things ended, I don't know. I'm open to talking to her again though.
Anyway, what do you girls think? I know this shouldn't matter. But, I wanted a girl's POV on this. We're still friends on Facebook, I have her whatsapp and we're still sub'd to each other on YouTube.
What Girls Said
Yeah, she’s probably still pissed at you!
Really? After 2 years? Is that even possible?
Yeah. I mean that, she’s not just mad at you dude, she is one pissed off lady!
I’ve avoided eye contact with an ex once, but that was just because I didn’t want him to come over and talk to me, plus this guy was a hugger, and I did not want to hug that asshole after what he did. The point is we hate confrontation, as women it’s like we are the pacifist. I know YOU think that we love confrontation, but that’s just with you (our current boyfriend) with everyone else, we are total pacifists. If she went to THAT much trouble to not just avoid eye contact, but to SHOW YOU that she was avoiding eye contact, then yeah she is fuckin’ furious! Hey after she wished you that happy birthday did you just happen talk to anyone about it, maybe some random convo with a friend where they said “hey I see xxxx wrote you a happy birthday on Facebook, and you maybe answered “yeah who knows why that crazy bitch does anything, she’s Fucking nuts? Well, if you did, that absolutely got back to her and she is furious and hell hath no fury like a woman, of especially like a crazy bitch scorned.
I didn't know that. Thank you for being honest. Two things:
1. I'm not angry or resentful at her after the breakup. I wanted to marry her and I let go of the bad feelings. I wasn't gonna say anything bad or to mention the breakup if I had the chance to talk her. I would love to apologise for anything and everything. I miss talking to her. I would've loved to talk to her, grab a coffe and hear from her. You don't have any idea how fucking fast my heart beated when I saw her there. She still has effect on me.
2. I didn't write her anything that time because I was respecting her wishes of No Contact, but I really wanted to call her and sing her Happy Birthday as I used to do. But, I didn't. And no, I didn't write anything about her on Fbook, I did talked about it over the phone with friends, not openly. Thank you, this replies mean a lot. I've been dreaming of her the whole weekned. Thank you. (:
Well, I did ask if you had a random conversation to anyone about her. You said that you had not openly discussed her. But that means you privately discussed her, and don’t forget, when you tell your friends, they likely tell THEIR girlfriends/wives, who if they know your ex will be happy to tell her what she heard. Seriously, I don’t believe that she would have just acted in THAT obviously aggressive way if she didn’t at least THINK that you somehow disrespected her! My BEST advice is do a LONG contemplation of anything you might have said about her and who too. Then perhaps if you DO discover something unkind you said about her, or something you said about her that COULD have been mistaken for being negative. If you figure that out, simply call her and apologize! You would be amazed at what a genuine and sincere apology can do for any relationship. I’m not saying that one apology and you’ll be back together, but it is definitely the ONLY place to start. If you genuinely cannot think of anything that you may have said about her that might be taken as negative by her, then just give her a call anyway, and apologize for that thing you did really hurt her (every relationship over 6mos old has one) just apologize tell her how bad you feel for taking her for granted, or if the opposite is true, apologize for rushing things and smothering her. Whatever it was, call her apologize, ask for nothing more (unless she specifically hints at it) and leave it there. At the very least you will earn some great karma! Good luck sweetie.