She is open I am flat for her but she never says yes, what should I do?

She was my friend. We were studying together and I got attracted to her, when she wanted to try whiskey. We both get little drunk and then I touched her hand and she put her head on my shoulder kissed my neck and I suddenly get aroused. I then tried to kiss her but dint let me I tried touching her and she didn't resist. Her boobs were like made of cotton or clouds, seriously the softest thing I have ever touched and we did it a couple of times. I asked her she didn't say yes to me. It's been years now we are not together as she is now in some other country with someone else but we talk sometimes and I think we both miss that time. I don't want her bad but I don't trust that guy and want to be with her... I don't know what to do. Feeling lonely sometimes without her.
She is open I am flat for her but she never says yes, what should I do?
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