Why is my manager treating me unfairly in the workplace?

[LL2933]

I have been working for a new company for four months. From the get go, I’ve had a strained relationship with my manager. When I first joined she seemed to be ok with me and showing me the ropes of the job. There was no indication that there were performance issues with my work. In our one to one online meetings early on I noticed she would sometimes say that it was concerning that I was struggling with particular aspects of the job and I’m not where I need to be at this point and she would have a smirk on her face when she said this. I didn’t think much of it at the time but then in my 3 month probation review meeting she dropped a bomb on me and told me that I was not where I needed to be and there were issues with my performance at work related to accuracy and not communicating with colleagues appropriately regarding tasks and set deadlines. She told me that if I continued she would extend my probation or dismiss me.

I reached out to a staff member from another team for support with my disability. He deals with disability in the workplace and reasonable adjustments. My manager said what I did was wrong asking for support for my disability outside of the team and that she would now have to fill in all this complex paperwork to support me.

In group discussions she ignores my existence whilst speaking to other colleagues and gives me dirty looks. I’ve noticed she will look me up and down sometimes and give me judgmental looks for no reason. In all our meetings now she’s constantly picking apart my work and giving me corrections. There has never been any praise of my work. I get the feeling she just wants me to quit. During events she also micromanages me. If I go up to a guest at the event to help him out and start speaking to him she will glare at me and then come up to us and take over so I don’t get a chance to speak to him. She also ignores me the entire event but speaks to everyone else but acts like I don’t exist.

What is her issue with me?

[Oliverlogan263]

This is definitely a tough situation. It seems pretty clear your manager doesn't like you for some reason and is being really unfair. A few thoughts on what could be going on:

- There could be some bias or prejudice on her part against you for things like gender, appearance, disability, etc. Unfortunately some people let those kind of biases affect how they treat others.

- She may feel threatened by you in some way - like she's insecure about her leadership if someone new and talented comes along. So she tries to put you down to make herself look better.

- Possibly a simple personality clash. Maybe your styles just don't mesh well even though you haven't really done anything wrong. Some people are just territorial or dislike certain types.

Regardless of the reason, it's wrong of her to treat you that way at work. A few things you could try:

- Talk to HR formally about your concerns and document specific examples of unfair treatment. Get it on record in case it continues or escalates.

- See if you can request a different manager or transfer to another team if possible. A change of leadership could help.

- Keep your head up and don't let her bad attitude get you down. Stay focused on doing good work despite her biased "reviews." Kill her with kindness when dealing with her directly.

- Look for another job maybe if it's too toxic of an environment. No job is worth that kind of stress.

I'd be happy to help brainstorm more ideas too. You definitely don't deserve to be treated that way - I hope you can get it resolved! Let me know if anything else happens.

[EmmaMary]

REPORTED...DUPLICATE.

[boggboss]

U cause her extra work due to your disability so she dislikes u