Girls, Is there any way to do this that doesn't come across as creepy as fuck?

[Anonymous]

I'm incredibly touch starved to the point it's fucking with my head and making me consider "Damaging" myself. Some nights I cry myself to sleep. I've given up dating, but I just want touch, all I want is a hug that's it.

I just want a platonic hug now and again from a woman so that I can at least be touched a bit, but I don't have any woman in my life or friends let alone female ones, so the only chance would be a stranger. The problem is I can't figure out how to ask for one without being creepy if that's possible at all.

I've considered going to the bar and maybe offering to buy someone a drink or give them some money for a quick hug but how is that not creepy as fuck to ask someone you don't know? I don't have an ulterior motive or have any kind of intent or goal I just want a hug now and again that's it, but I can't figure out any way to ask for one from somebody without looking creepy AF.

Are there any circumstance where you might give a stranger a hug because they asked and really wanted just wanted one and nothing else?

Yes, I'll explain.

No, there's really no way to not be creepy about this.

[Nikki1989]

Surround yourself with more loving, friendly people. I hug people every day of the week.

[Asker]

Being honest and objective this is doable (In theory) but it's a lot harder for guys and my circumstances make it harder than most. I've been trying to figure out how to meet people and make new friends but the only place talking to strangers is acceptable in my town is a bar. People will just think you're weird anywhere else for talking to a stranger. I can't afford to spend time at the bar more than once or twice a month at best but worse the bar is a bad place to meet people who are stable enough to be good friends. I spent time at the bar attempting just that but all that taught me was in spite of all my faults at least I'm not an alcoholic.

[biabyblue9]

the worst place to go to is a bar, you should go somewhere else thats healthier

[Asker]

@biabyblue9 Like I said I don't really have any other options. My town is small and Rural.

[biabyblue9]

are there any parks or something?

[Asker]

@biabyblue9 Not where I could approach strangers and not look like a weirdo. Coffee shops used to be one of those places where you would socialize and meet people but now everyone just texts on their phones in a public setting there.

[biabyblue9]

Then I think you should try, even if you see everyone on their phone

[Abbycado]

You really can’t with a complete stranger. Perhaps an escort? I dunno.

[Asker]

None to speak of here and also prostitution illegal in my state.

[Flower7]

Do you have any family members?

[Asker]

Yes, but it's not the same and I don't see anyone but my father very often. He gives me hugs now and then and it helps but there's just something different about getting a hug from someone who isn't related to you. I think part of it is I feel sociably rejected and I think the reason I want touch from someone I'm not related too so badly is maybe I perceive it as some kind of approval or legitimacy in in the world I don't know. Honestly if I had friends this wouldn't' be as big a problem but I don't all I really have is my father.

Part of why I'd prefer it to be a woman as well is simply put I'm straight but also social norms. It's different asking a guy than a girl for a hug for a few reasons. One of which is most men if I approached and asked for one would either be weirded out even more than a girl, think I'm gay for asking or just make fun of me and say I'm pathetic etc.
There's a stigma against straight men showing other men affection because that's gay apparently. In fact, there's a greater than 0% chance I might even get attacked physically.

I think part of it is I also just want a few brief seconds where I can pretend in my head I'm not alone and do have someone who cares about me. I know it would mean nothing to them, and I don't plan to do anything more than a hug and say anything other than thanks but just a few seconds where I can close my eyes and be in denial about my life would make things a lot easier.

I've been listening to ASMR because if I meditate and pretend hard enough it almost feels like someone is cuddling me. I just want to close my eyes, hug someone for a few seconds and pretend everything is different than it is in my mind. I think the best way to describe it I guess is as me just wanting to daydream for a few seconds in my head and then go home and carry on with my day.

[biabyblue9]

i think there's an app/organization that you can pay to get hugs, but i dont remember the name