I am just one of the 100 billion people who have ever lived on an insignificant planet that has existed for millions of years, in a universe that has been around for 14.5 billion years. I have no exceptional qualities. I am not "the best" at anything. Yet, my needs and desires run deeper and are far more numerous than any of my attributes.
I want to feel important, to feel valuable, to be treated as special.
I long for excitement, adventure, eternity, happiness, meaning, and so much more.
Unfortunately, under the conditions I live in, only a small portion of these desires are met—superficially at best.
Given this situation, why should I keep living?
What am I really continuing to exist for, carrying the pain of countless unmet needs on my back?
Worse still, this is a game I'm doomed to lose—because one day, I will die and cease to exist.
So why should I endure all this pain for such a short distraction?
None of the popular philosophies offer me a satisfying answer.
Existentialism? I can’t manage to create a lasting meaning for myself. Any excitement I feel fades within two days.
Absurdism? I’m told to “imagine Sisyphus happy,” but I simply can’t. It feels absurd indeed.
Acceptance? That doesn’t work either—the pain only grows.
Give up my desires? That doesn't last either—by day two, I’m craving strawberry cake again (and if I don’t have the money, I’m doubly cursed).
I have no hope, but I wrote this just in case an answer comes that might change my thinking.
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Intellect in overdrive and completely out of touch with your primal feeling. Slap yourself in the face really hard to remember what it feels like to feel. No joking, it's a fun sensation.
So is it better to stay in the realm of primal feelings?
You are always in the realm of primal feelings. Your primal feelings right now are saying "Low resources. Low social status. Danger. Conserve energy. Must find solutions. Use intellect. Can't find solutions. Conserve energy." Downward spiral.
You need to create an upward spiral. "My social status grows from here. My resources grow from here. I'm the beast underdog. Wassup homie 💪😤"
We can’t convince you not to kill yourself if that’s what you’re looking for. Meaning is self-assigned, you give your own life meaning even if it’s for as petty a reason as “I don’t want to die.”
Life has no meaning. Life evolved to reproduce