What four years on GAG has taught me about Girls on GAG



1. This is humorously written and posted. No serious stuff here.

2. Written in the mind set of 'GirlsAskGuys', but anything that applies to women may also apply to men.

The Archetypes of Girls on GAG (part 1):

What four years on GAG has taught me about Girls on GAG.

Every Girl

While she may not be *every* girl, she could be every other question in GirlsAskGuys. Her question is always the same. "Is he interested in me?"

She fits in VERY well.

Hello, Every Girl! Welcome to GirlsAskGuys!!

Shy Girl

She's so shy. She has a crush. "How can I get him to ask me?" she says. The thought of making a move is fearful and daunting. Where to even begin? What will happen to me if he says no?

Hello, Shy Girl! Heh, wait, come back!!!

Needy Girl

Always asks some question like, "He hasn't texted me in over 3 minutes! Help! Is he still interested?! How long must I wait? Is 10 minutes too long?"

Hello Needy Girl, please take a deep breath and relax.

Digital Girl

No, its not Hatsune Miku - but Digital Girl is queen of the facebook stalkers and a text messaging
fiend. She occassionally does Skype calls. Whether it is behind her computer or behind her phone, her space is cyberspace. She always writes awkward questions about men that do not seem to line up well, until you figure out she didn't actually meet with them yet. She sometimes thinks she is in a relationship with an e-male, especially if she has never experienced a real relationship before.

A case of Digital Girl NEVER results in Old Maid Girl (this is a phenomena worth a nobel prize to whoever figures it out). Also, Digital Girl eventually goes outside. She is also not Needy Girl. She seems to be Shy Girl as often as any other girl; Digital Girl does not preclude Shy Girl. There is typically hope for her.

Hello Digital Girl, thanks for posting! Now it is time go outside.

What four years on GAG has taught me about Girls on GAG

Old Maid Girl

If the question is "Why am I still single?" you can stop reading the details now and move to another question. Alas, you have had the misfortune of encountering an Old Maid Girl. I have answered this with dozens of different approaches: agreement, disagreement, luke warm, challenging, passive,
analytical, caring, heartless, friendly, unfriendly, and even random - it all matters not. It does not matter the girl, or her situation details, or her personal details, or anything at all it seems. All these girls are different, but one thing remains the same:

She'll award MH to the first person who says "Its not you, keep looking!" or, "You're so beautiful all
men are intimidated, despite thousands of years of male breeding potential!"

A few times I gave her friend requests (now 'follow' with new site) to message her, talk with her a little, and then based on the experience maybe provide her some positive feedback what she is doing wrong.

Nope! She won't accept, even though every other girl has. I think we're onto something with that one.

Hello Old Maid Girl, I'd say something but my voice is drowned out by the sound of how awesome you are!

Fate Girl

This girl will ask how she can find the "one." Who?? I don't know of anybody named One. Exactly why is the universe somehow obligated to churn out all souls in loving diametrically fitting pairs? Even if there was proof for that, who is to say your soul mate wasn't already born 1,000 years ago?

In my guestimation, you got about 1 in every 100,000* people who are an 'optimal match' or as optimal as its going to be related to your ability to sustain a relationship. Heck, Fate Girl, if it truly pleases you then you may call this 1 in 100k match 'the one.' The problem is Fate isn't batting for you; you are batting for you. Keep your eye on the ball!

Otherwise, Fate Girl, you will be a lonely one. It really is in your hands.

The good news is Fate Girl can never double as Old Maid Girl or Needy Girl. Sometimes she can be Digital Girl.

Hello Fate Girl, I found Mr. Right but he told me he was with someone else. Better luck next time!

* = For some temperaments, this number is even lower.

No Faith in Marriage Girl

She thinks marriage is awful. She thinks marriage will never last. She wonders why people even get married. She won't get married. She won't get split up like mommy and daddy because she's not doing it to begin with. She knows she is cynical but she doesn't care.

But there is one thing we all have in common with her! We would all prefer not to see her get married.

Hello No Faith in Marriage Girl, you must find your own path!

Ranting Girl

Also very common is her twin, Ranting Boy. Except gender stereotypes make him look lame(r) when he does it.

Ranting Girl asks a question, like, "Why the f*** would someone do that?" - except she's not really that curious, about as curious as there is a situation-changing answer as to why they would.

As it turns out, she is just ranting. Sometimes her rants are interesting to read, like piecing together a story with telltale clues, which take the form of generalizations (i.e., "Why do all men cheat?" --> Did someone just cheat on you?). They are obviously applying to a highly specific set of circumstances that she is no doubt currently going through.

Hello Ranting Girl, you tell'em!

What four years on GAG has taught me about Girls on GAG

Idealist Feminist Girl

She is very educated on the topic. She had lots of teachers. She read lots of books and websites. She
did a lot of learnin'. She is also probably 18-24 and she definitely knows better than you. She thinks she will impress the world with her 'infallible' logic. She is always right. She also knows what your argument is, even if you never stated one or were just asking. All of course in the context of her own fiction.

Hello Idealist Feminist Girl, GAG does not stand for Girls Against Guys.

Twice Pretty Girl

Someone told her she was beautiful, or sexy, or what have you. She will then ask a question saying,
"Someone said I was beautiful and/or sexy. What does it mean?" The obvious answer is, of course, that someone thought she was beautiful and/or sexy. Or just leading her on, heh heh. Except in the answer box it will read, "It means you are pretty/sexy", so she gets to see the compliment TWICE. Also to let everyone on G@G know she is in the hotness club.

Too bad media showers us guys with so many attractive girls that it is utterly drab to know some girl on GirlsAskGuys is pretty. Yeah, go take a number behind all the other millions of supermodels.

Poor thing, how will she get her ego fed? Well, I suppose I can help out:

Hello Twice Pretty Girl, you're so pretty!

Drifting Girl

She will ask if it is ok if she does something. Is it right or wrong if I say this or that? Is it ok if
someone does this thing, or that other thing? Her values are adrift. She hasn't defined her moral compass yet.

And she needs YOU to tell her what is right. Or wrong. Let's hope she doesn't fall for anything.

Hello Drifting girl, stand for something!

Whelp, hope you all had a good laugh, and like I said, whatever applies to girls here also applies to men! No specific time planned for the next installment, but it might happen someday.

I guess I'll go back to answering all your questions now, hahaha.

What four years on GAG has taught me about Girls on GAG
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24Girl Opinion
12Guy Opinion

Most Helpful Guy

  • Unit1

    Outstanding take :D :)
    So funny and kind of true.

    That was worth experiencing. Really hilarious!
    Thanks for the laughs bro!
    Again: AWESOME TAKE !!!

    Like 1 Person
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Most Helpful Girl

  • Stacyzee

    Reading this made me realize that when I log in I'm signing in to a mental institution.
    Damn gag has problems ! :-0

    Like 34 People
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What Girls & Guys Said

  • musicbrain5

    LOL! I haven't figured out which one I am yet. I don't think I'm any of them, haha.

    Like 1 Person
    • Pedantic

      You're not don't worry :) It's just like the million + 1 questions on the feed

  • Possible_Mate

    lol very funny, and very true! i enjoyed it a lot! i think im a combo of internet/ ranting / ideal feminist :P but you also forgot one category: trolllllll

    Disagree 3 People
    • Pedantic

      You know, the term troll has experienced some drift so it is hard to do. In the early days of the 'net, it generally meant someone who deliberately said something stupid (intentional logical fallacies), in hopes of someone trying to 'correct' you. Then, they refuse to be 'corrected', inviting further effort to 'correct' you (and ultimately frustration) from another poster. Others take it to mean anyone who is deragatory or just enjoys being so. Beyond the sarcasm that gets taken seriously from time to time, I really haven't seen many trolls under the classical definition.

  • emmabee11

    Want to know what i've learned? that all 99% of people care about is getting those XPER points for certificates and they make posts designed to get people to comments mainly based on touchy subjects because they know most people can't control themselves... lol just like this one... you know that any girl reading this would get offended... i'm sorry but earn XPER points the honest way... give some actual honest advice to people... there is your XPER points...

    Like 1 Person
    • Queenq01

      So I'm guessing you're a ranting girl...

    • emmabee11

      It's a stupid post just like most on here... Stereotypes don't mean a thing... a person is a person with a brain not a thing... and THIS what i said would be the reason why people would respond because they think "That makes me angry someone would base someone off a stereotype, how date they, i will respond to this and give them my pennes worth" lol... that's exactly the reaction they want and most people fall for it... thus they get lots of XPER points.

    • @emmabee11 i dont get the big deal with xper points anyway, who cares. you shouldn't get so worked up over this, its not a big deal.

    • Show All
  • Psi_Unknown

    Humorous with truth to it!

    3 minutes is funny! One time I sat down and zoned out for 6 hours, not knowing what speed I was at, or where I was in time or space.

    There are some intriguing points in there, such as fate girl and 100k optimal matches.

    The archetypes thing is fun, and tough to get right without memorizing.

  • TheLittleBuggy

    this is good :o I've never seen anyone make up GAG archetypes before xD

    I don't know which I am though D":
    @blondfrog Pick for me buddy xDD

    Like 1 Person
    • GirlScout

      Some newbie girl did it before, much better than this.

    • ^^ I must have missed it >_< but how could a "newbie" girl get it?

    • blondfrog

      Okay :P even though I don't know for what summons you :P

    • Show All
  • OnceUponADream143

    Lol. I've seen some of these before and honsetly, been some of them before. Funny take. I enjoyed it. X3

    Like 1 Person
  • idkwtftoputhere

    Oh man, I didn't think I'd find myself on this list but I legit fit into the exact definition of "No faith in marriage girl"
    Well done.

    Like 1 Person
  • annie_annie

    What about the tomboy? Because I am one.😂😂😂

    Anyway, was fun to read, thumbs uo.👍

    Like 2 People
  • Betwyn

    One of those fits me perfectly..

    A few others, on occasion.

    Like 1 Person
  • springocelot

    Hilarious :p

    i look forward to the next installment... whenever that is :)

    Like 1 Person
  • HookingSwan

    I had a fun time reading this

    Great take. Not to be taken too seriously ;)

  • Prettygurl12


    Pretty sure which broad category I fall into.

  • zell0is0my0name

    Lol I guess I'm the no faith in marriage+ the ideal Feminist girl 😂

    Like 2 People
  • Bandit74

    LOL the 18-24 year old, know it all feminist describe so many girls on here.

    LikeDisagree 2 People
  • Nik1hil

    Idealist feminist girl, GAG is for girlsaskguys, not Girls against Guys, lol LMFAO it made my day

  • Homicidal_Queen

    lmao I fall into some of those categories and more.

  • Accipiter

    What label does the "What does it mean?" girl fall under?

  • RainbowFanGirl

    This was funny lol

    Like 6 People
  • zombiebabe

    great funny take!

    Like 2 People
  • Polswedgirl

    Hahahah so true.

  • Show More (14)