With everyman, it is the same way. He is completely blind to me today and months from now he is smitten. It makes me feel as if I'm not good enough. Makes me feel as if I am second best. Like what's wrong with me?It makes me feel insecure inside. I hate that I feel this way but I can't let go of this image in my head. I just want a man to say that he knew I was the one when he first saw me.
I have spent years of my life reaching out to men first. Back then I didn't know my worth and I allowed men to disrespect my love. Men who couldn't give two flying f's about me. They came around after I fought my way into their hearts. I don't want to do that anymore. I want to be pursued. No, take that back. I deserve to be pursued. I deserve to be chosen. I deserve to be valued.
I have liked this guy for a while now but he only found out that I existed just a couple months ago. He's been coming around for a year now. He befriended everyone but me. He has even seen me before and we've had a casual conversation but that was it. I was a tad bigger before so maybe that's why he didn't notice me or make advances. He saw me as a person but not in a romantic fashion is what I mean.
Once he really noticed me he began to drop hints about how he feels about me the next day. Now he can't keep his eyes off of me. He's helping me do things and he's following me around. I think he only noticed me because I had on a tight skirt and got a new hairdo the day before.
I just keep asking myself how come he never truly saw me before he began to like me.
If he fancied me be as soon as he saw me I would have been underaged back then. Lol. Maybe it's my fault. Maybe I need to be more friendly with people.
I like him. I really do but I just wonder am I searching for a perfect love story that only exists in the movies. He's perfect otherwise. Should I let him go and wait until a man notices me romanticly and chases me from the beginning? Can attraction/feelings grow?