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I dont think that had anything to do with gender roles, violence or hostility against women in society more like someone of their meds. Male mental health is more to do with it.
This sounds like AOC's (paraphrased) narcissism:
"I memorized a bunch of information, which I am too incompetent to understand doesn't translate directly into experience & will now go out, young, inexperienced & preach as if everything I've memorized automatically translates to real-world fact, even though I have little to no experience in real-world economics at all"
Oh, is that so, Chris?
Everything you said in that is false and does not apply.
Memorized
Doesn't understand
Incompetent
Inexperienced
Young
You've got some nerve, don't you.
You don't attack the concepts, because there is 30 years of research behind them, and so instead attack the person. I just love it when men who are complete strangers tell me who I am, what I know, and what I am capable of.
Fuck off. Your comment has no validity.
Nope. While there are plenty of neckbeards, incels and r/niceguys out there. I highly doubt someone sane would be as overt and stupid as write what you're claiming.
If they were, then you should be heading over to the cops, and pressing charges.
That fact alone should tell you it's not any sort of "man's world", out to subjugate women. It's more a case of you have to gather enough evidence to present in court to make a case.
"Nope"? Are you fucking kidding me?
I said, "A message I received today..." It came online, here on GAG. You think I purposely faked all those typos and poor grammar? The internet is the Wild West. Governments and corporations are, as we speak, trying to figure out if and how it should be regulated. Shit like this happens constantly. BY/FROM MEN.
As @G3tAClue also commented, " I’ve received multiple “get raped” messages on here as well by trolling angry men who have nothing better to do."
"You highly doubt"?
People don't get lawsuits filed against them for threats on the internet. Get real. And I wouldn't do that anyway. It's idle, it's a wish, and I know that.
You've got hundreds of thousands of guys online constantly bitching about these theoretical I-heard-about-some-incident falsified claims by women. Some of that is true. And some of this is true. Women are antagonized, accosted, and threatened on a regular basis. Your denial of that fact, of this, is worth nothing.
THERE IS NO FUCKING JUSTIFICATION TO THREATEN OR WISH RAPE ON SOMEONE. And the fact that men like you won't acknowledge that, and claim it's a lie, just deepens the crevasse between the sexes.
As a matter of fact, now I'm glad you wrote this. It's proof of how nasty some men are.
See this is the problem. These threats and horrible interacts happen very regularly on the internet but many guys don’t take what me and @AmandaYVR seriously. Look it up dude, it’s a real problem and is only becoming bigger and more serious. Just because it doesn’t happen to you doesn’t mean anything.
I did an experiment and made a blue account on here to see just how differently guys talk to me, and the difference is ASTOUNDING. Coming from the blue accounts that regularly threaten women, instead, I got instant respect and was taken seriously for everything I said even though it was the same shit I was saying as a pink account.
* jackass alert *
@G3tAClue that is interesting experiment you did. At least this one blue account will never threaten women. 😎
There is nothing masculine about assaulting people, especially those who are physically weaker.
"Gender role adherence"? If you think that only females are raped you have no clue that rape and gender roles are two separate things.
I am a male who was raped. I believe rapists (including female rapists) should be shot on sight.
As to that perso who said that to you, it sounds to me that the guy was using a sick, extreme form of hyperbole to make his point. It doesn't invalidate his point.
Did I say only females are raped? No.
Everyone who has been raped, or attempted rape, or any violence perpetrated upon them has my sympathies. No one should ever have to live through that.
But a defence against males raping is not "well, females rape too."
"As to that perso who said that to you, it sounds to me that the guy was using a sick, extreme form of hyperbole to make his point. It doesn't invalidate his point."
Invalidate? That's not the word. Does it justify or make acceptable such language? No, it does not.
You want to talk about rape? Fine.
90% OF ADULT RAPE VICTIMS ARE FEMALE.
Did you get that? 90%.
1 in every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime (14.8% completed, 2.8% attempted).
As of 1998, an estimated 17.7 million American women had been victims of attempted or completed rape.
Young women are especially at risk.
82% of all juvenile victims are female.
Females ages 16-19 are 4 times more likely than the general population to be victims of rape, attempted rape, or sexual assault.3
Women ages 18-24 who are college students are 3 times more likely than women in general to experience sexual violence. Females of the same age who are not enrolled in college are 4 times more likely.
1 out of every 10 rape victims are male.
But who is committing the rapes? NOT ALL WOMEN. MEN COMMIT RAPES ON MEN TOO.
Men and Boys Are Also Affected by Sexual Violence
Male college students are at a higher risk than non-students of the same age to experience sexual assault or rape. Male students ages 18-24 are five times more likely than non-students of the same age to experience sexual violence.
Millions of men in the United States have been victims of rape.
As of 1998, 2.78 million men in the U. S. had been victims of attempted or completed rape.5
About 3% of American men—or 1 in 33—have experienced an attempted or completed rape in their lifetime.5
Why so angry? I hope you are not a victim.
I stand by what I posted.
Raped by a female or male?
I stand by what I said as well.
Hey Amanda. I see you are as empathetic as the guy who triggered you. You are a sexist turd. I am a victim of rape. Maybe you should suffer the same fate as I did. Go fuck yourself bitch. That's right! I said it.
Ty. go fuck yourself. Now do you know how it felt when you said that to her? Dont say to people what you dont want them to say to you.
Yes i understand that its really unfortunate that you have been a victim of rape. For that, i am sympathetic. However this doesn't mean you get to question the validity of the writer's point. Because this is about violence against women, perpetrated by men. Nowhere does the say that men aren't victims (of violence by women) as well. It just isn't the main focus of the article.
With that said, Gender role adherence does have a distant relation to male-on-female sexual violence, which i have addressed in my own reply to this mytake.
However, @AmandaYVR it doesn't help ro rub rape stats into someone from a minority category, because it seems like (although it isn't that way) you are using the fact that most rapes on women (majority) and (especially) men are perpetrated by men to invalidate the point that a small fraction of offenders are women. Which is very personal to him as he is a victim. So although not intended, it comes across as diminishing his legitimacy as a male victim of female-on-male rape (im assuming here, we dont know really), which we know you didn't intend to do. Im guessing thats why this conversation ground to a sour halt.
let me correct myself. " the fact that the most rapists are men, even for rapes committed against men, to invalidate (although not intended) the point that a small fraction of offenders are women".
Now this is totally unrelated, but all that aside, open reporting has never been a thing, and many rape cases (especially for male victims) go unreported. So the figures may not be very accurate. But that aside, thats all i have for now.
"blah blah blah testosterone is evil men are the devil blah blah blah"
Imagine if I made similar observations of how women have a tendency to treat men as disposable tools, i'd probably be called every name available to human kind and 3 new ones would be invented for me specifically.
She did not said all men are bad calmed down.
Also make good points about how women treat us as disposable and you will be listen to. I doubt that you can but go ahead and try.
I never used the word testosterone, not once.
What you are doing is deflecting, and not acknowledging that some men do shit things.
Which would be the same as me not acknowledging that some women do shit things. Which I never have. I have also written criticizing certain aspects of females. Because no one is perfect. Are they? But your, and some men's denial, is the real problem.
You are completely ignoring female violence against men.
I do not deny its existence. I am not writing about violence in general. This article is about some of the roots of male hostility.
Hostility and aggression are circular in that they potentiate each other. Hostility and aggression rarely occur for no reason.
Your first comment has nothing to do with your second, so I'm sure you have many thoughts on this. This mytake is about one narrow aspect, rigid male gender role adherence.
Most violent crime in the world is perpetrated by men, not women. That is not to say that women don't physically hit or shove their men sometimes, but it is rarely life-threatening like it is for women. Particularly when you account for violent acts by strangers. Men are also attacked sometimes (by other men), not by women who are strangers, out in the street, back alleys and parking lots. Even online, most pinks do not verbally attack most men, as is common in reverse.
I never implied that hostility occurs for no reasons. If anyone wants to tackle that, be my guest. But it's far too complex to be written about by gaggers, in a fair and balanced manner, and that would encompass all influences. Most people just want to bitch and not truly analyze or research anything. They based it on their own limited dating experience.
Suggest you have a look at this:
Desmarais, S. L., Reeves, K. A., Nicholls, T. L., Telford, R. P., &
Fiebert, M. S. (2012). Prevalence of physical violence
In intimate relationships, Part 2: Rates of male and
Female perpetration. Partner Abuse, 3(2) 170-198.
This?
"Consistent with prior reviews, pooled prevalence was slightly greater for female- compared to male- perpetrated physical IPV: more than 1 in 4 women (28.3%) and 1 in 5 men (21.6%) reported perpetrating physical violence in an intimate relationship."
https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2012-19696-003
That, among other things. You might want to read the entire study. There is more.
Like "Findings underscore the need for interventions that acknowledge the use of violence by women in intimate relationships."
So if you wanted to write about a problem, it seems reasonable to expect that you might write about the most prevalent problem, or if the problem is bimodal, as this one is, about both aspects of the problem, rather than just one, since writing about just one part of it distorts the inherent synchronicity between both aspects. Just a suggestion.
Great take, thank you Amanda
Apart of me is feeling that the best thing to do is to merely shoot the offending cause of this essay. Another part is wondering why most of the references come from more than 15 years ago?
If they feel weak and inferior then you should be able to vanquish them
Thanks for this! This was well written.
I'll put it this way - he was an asshole, no doubt, but he does have a point. Police are needed.
Unfortunately some of you are zoning in on that part, but I am not against police in general, or defunding, or think all cops are bad so that aspect is all moot. Just because one person says something in an offhand way doesn't mean it is fact or truth or an accurate interpretation.
Well yeah but it also could be
Amen sister!!! Great my take. I loved this!! 😎👍
Anyone who gets this mad over a hate message likely needs a re evaluation for how they spend their time and who they give their energy to
You need to consider the cumulative effect of messages like these over a lifetime, and the ripple effect anger and hate has on society. On women, men, children, you name it. This is not an isolated event.
Your girlfriend committed suicide. You should care about what's happening in society. We are all connected.
Don't you dare bring that up, that won't happen again, got it? I get far worse hate mail all the time, people sending me videos of people being tortured and murdered barbarically, posting my address and pictures of me, mocking me for the death of my fiancee in May, and it gets even worse. Yet you don't see me writing a several page long angry response to them which is exactly the kind of reaction they want out of you. Yes, it's not an isolated event, so then why are you making it only about women? Getting pissed off at hate mail only ensures that you'll get more becaude their goal was to piss you off. I'll have you know that I was there for her all the way and always stood up for her and the fact that you casually brought it up is disgusting and says a lot about the type of person you are and makes it even more difficult to make me feel bad about the hate mail you're getting.
I know you're pissed off and don't want another message, but I'm going to set a few things straight here:
* I did not say that to offend or in any way blame you. It is not a criticism. On the contrary, I meant that with all seriousness and sincerity. You took it another way because you are lumping me into your 'hate mail.' I am not that type of person. I am an activist against hate and violence. I'm sorry it upset you. Though I stand by my intention, which was not meant to be seen as callous.
* This mytake is not actually to the guy who said I should be raped. It's to bring awareness to others, for the kind of stuff that goes on online. You should not have experienced what you did, and I should not have, and neither should anyone else. I hate dismissiveness. Ignoring people and ignoring the world's problems is something I am vehemently against. I am also very against your ideas about gun ownership and violence, but I choose long ago to unblock you, and many others, as a matter of principle, and to try and bridge people together, not be divisive.
* I was attacked for expressing concern and defence of someone. Essentially it is a political hot button issue. I feel very strongly about it, and about justice, but I did not attack any user. I merely expressed my opinion in defence of someone. There is no justification for hostility towards me. I'm making people think, and analyze themselves and the world and their beliefs. I know that. Beyond that, the personal attacks are unjust.
As soon as you said "Mansplain" you lost any and all sympathy we'd have had for you
If you don't want me to use 'mansplain' then you stop using words like 'snowflake' and 'incel.'
I don't like any of these words, but they're in the vernacular.
Snowflake is a term used to describe an emotionally fragile person, typically immature in behaviour.
Incel literally mean involuntary celibate
Mansplain is just sexist at it's core.
If you want something to change then don't feed the flames with the same mindset as those you oppose posses.
Ok, I will agree that mansplain is... stupid. I hadn't ever really thought about it much, tbh. Maybe I won't use it anymore. I'll think about that. But to be fair, invalidating an entire article because of one word is also very closed-minded. Overly sensitive, many would say.
And snowflake is at least just as offensive, maybe more. Why? Because, it's a diversion, a deflection from the other person taking any ownership or responsibility for what they have said/done. It allows for ANYTHING to be said. For example, say I say to you, "Nachowedgie, you're an idiot. You don't know what you're talking about [about whatever, fill in the blank], you're just an incel [or whatever.] Then you get offended, and retort back something rude/whatever. Then I call you "Snowflake!" What has that accomplished? Nothing.
I find it odd, actually, that in the GAG rules and guidelines, "you're an idiot" is an example of violating their rules because it's 'offensive.' That seems very mild to me. That sets the bar pretty low for tolerance, right? But that clearly tells us how they want the site users to conduct themselves, with respect for one another. But many, many things well beyond that are said, and still up on the site. (probably because they don't have the manpower to police everyone to that degree.)
And because we have so much push back from [mostly males] about censorship, free speech, etc.
To be more clear, if I call you a "typical toxic male asshole" it probably will, and should in my opinion, be removed. But whatever direction these insults are flung, why does the word "snowflake" have to be brought into the exchange at all? Why is an antagonist act online considered more ok than one irl, which would never happen?
Incel is a complicated one, because some guys are voluntarily calling themselves incels now. But it's also used as a slur against, a dismissal of a guy's opinion that he writes.
I don't like any of these terms being used. But I'm not ruler of the internet.
Why didn't you tell him this?
Because he is not worth it.
So you made a whole post?
I want the majority good and decent men of the world to be reminded what we females go through.
I don't waste my time engaging with idiots, but it is worth my time and energy to speak with good people. I am not here only to be entertained. I also spend a lot of time thinking about why the world is the way it is.
I see and agree with your comment but there's one thing about your post that seems a little off if you dont mind? Yes insecurities and such can equal a violent nature but the real problem or issue behind it is finding the trigger and how many times its been repeatedly pulled. For example lets say Tom treats girls with respect, help them and offers to go above and beyond whether or not it is for romantical gain or not. Tom finds Tina someone who he has know fo rdd a while has helped out as a friend and eventually grew feelings. Tina a not so good female among the many in the world decides to play with Tom's feelings and ultimately use him for her gain until she is done whether it is attention or money or etc. Tom move on right? Maybe a little hurt but then runs into a relationship with a girl named Carol. Carol cheats on Tom. A new negative experience and a quite painful one. By now Tom has been through a lot mentally. Now Tom has changed from what he first used to be because of his sole environment and experiences. Tom can no longer know if he can trust anyone which a lack of trust can lead to a lot of things like you said could be a multitude of things ranging from insecure to violence. Lets say life gets a little worse for Tom and he ends up being abusive not only from past experiences but criticism from the fellow male community. Dont you agree its not so much what they are now but what cause them to become violent or send hate messages such as the one you have received?
Yes, it is ALSO about what caused them to become violent, hateful, hostile. I do agree. And I am interested in this as well.
I wrote about this in my Joker movie review.
"This is not so much the story of an evil genius or an arch nemesis or a psychopathic killer. It's a social commentary, completely apt for today's world, about a sad and disenfranchised man, who despite all efforts and optimism and desire for a normal life and to be a good person and be recognized for that, it just doesn't come to fruition. He is not the everyman, but he is not an uncommon man either. There are many men today who suffer from some of these same disadvantages. This movie is not a cautionary tale. There is likely little this character could have done to reverse his fortune or fate. More akin to a documentary or a biopic, a 'what if', if at every turn the road diverged, a man is struck unlucky? What leads to his ultimate downfall (or triumph, depending on your angle) was not one thing, but many. A series of unfortunate events. This film is impressive in its concept and execution. It is a movie mostly appealing to men, about men, and what struggles they face. But I believe everyone over a certain age should watch it. You could screen this movie in university classes, supporting various important topical subjects, and have potentially hours of discussion about many social and economic issues facing people today."
Required Viewing: Joker (2019) ↗
I ran into a g@g member yesterday who claimed to dislike men becasue i guess she was hurt by a few bad apple and I told her that was just her experience and she hates men only because of her experience. Yet she argued me to annoyance when she kept stating men were bad and we are just animals and only intend to destroy and cause pain. Yet, the thing about pain, hate, betrayal and negative mindsets it is not just to one gender but to anyine and everyone can aquired this. Just as (i am aware this is focused on men) this mytake can be said the same about women. There actually statistically is shown that women tend to do more domestic violence to men and lash out but it is not reported. Reasons being societal judgement, people won't always believe a female can abuse men physically or sexually, and if some retaliate it could put them in a worse situation such as jail or public ridicule as a wife/woman beater. But women report more domestic violence against them and the community is right behind them. If i told people for example my wife hit me it would not be as seriously taken as my imaginary wife getting hit by me. Both men and women can share feelings of insecurity and turn it into violence and etc. Have you ever watch the Netflix documentary about the child Gabriel Fernandez? His mother went through some negative experiences and because she was insecure and held negative feelings ahe ended up abusing her child till he died. And then did not care that her child died. Its a dark story but it shows how the ugly can come out of either gender and turn people evil. I recommend you watch the first 2 episodes and if you can handle it watch the rest.
thanks for reminding me that she is due for a good ass beating soon not LOL JK by the way
Uh... what?
My girlfriend i haven't slapped her ass in some time
Hey you Feminist Bitxh ranting about Toxic Masculinity Again 🤦🤦
Did I use the phrase "toxic masculinity"? Nope.
Again? Where? Tell me where.
Thanks for your contribution (not.) What will we do without wise men like you adding such brilliant insight to the world.
Go back to your cave. The adults are talking.
Asshole.
right hon
Women are more violent than men.
Let's see, 1 day on GAG and you're already starting with these lies.
Checked your account. Lots of great stuff in there already.
Why don't you take your militant attitude and go take a nap with your shark. See if you can figure out the word play there.
Oh, and congratulations, you made the list. I blocked ya. I'm not in the mood.
@SetFree You're either lying or delusional, both of which are dangerous and have no place in society. Here are some tips for you. Stop listening to Alex Jones (and Info Wars in general), don't listen to Dennis Prager, and just read actually balanced research and reporting. It will make your life and your outlook on it better