My boyfriend says he won't celebrate Valentine's Day or get me anything?

Question

This is my first boyfriend. He says that he doesn't like Valentine's Day at all. He said he won't buy me flowers or a teddy bear or chocolates or anything like that or go do anything romantic together. He says he should be able to get me those things whenever he wants, not on a specific day. At first I was okay with it because he does treat me well and he did buy me a nice diamond pendant for Christmas... but then I was told that guys who don't do on Valentine's Day are selfish men because they can't even go out of their way to do something special for their lover on a very special day. Also, a lot of boyfriends call their girls queen but be said he refused to call me that and instead call me his princess. Honestly, I don't like that because it makes me feel less special? =/

heavensgift2girls · Accepted Answer

I love getting my girl things like flowers, and random gifts for no reason. I still hate valentines day just like nearly every other guy on the planet. I don't even like sex on Valentines day, because it feels like I just hired a prostitute. I bought her stuff, so she feels pressured to hold up her end and have sex with me. There is nothing remotely romantic about forced romance.

Stop worrying about what the other girls are called, and start appreciating your man. He buys you a diamond necklace, calls you princess, and now want to think the worst of him, just because someone else told you he should do more. You are sounding like a very ungrateful girlfriend right now. I can understand your being disappointed, but you should know him enough to appreciate him, and realize that he isn't selfish.

Novacane · Accepted Answer

First of all don't listen to what people say, some people celebrate Valentines and some don't its no big deal. First of all Valentines is not a day where its meant for men to take the initiative. Its a couples thing and thats 2, you and him, so if you want to do something their is nothing wrong with you taking initiative, ignore the social norm. Society has created this idea that we must go over board on a specific day. Also put it this way, if he treats you well on a regular basis this a win, compared to the people were their significant other only treats them well on that day and the others is back to normal. in reality you are winning. so ignore what they say, and about the princess part well thats personal and have to speak to him about that

rsstanford · Accepted Answer

He treats you right but you feel less special because he want call you queen? actions are gold so what he doesn't call you queen if he respects you and value you why does it matter if he doesn't call you queen? And the V day thing like some women think that's the only day a man is suppose to do things for them. It should be every day when he calls you beautiful or open doors for you and listen. No men should make you feel less special. And you seem like you are going off of hear say. What works for one couple won't work for yours. Hell spending the day together should be enough then fucking candy and other crap. He doesn't have to do everything that day just make it about only you and him and that's all that should matter

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

grow up. stop trying to live a superficial life.
but if thats what you want, and can't deal with a great 'diamond pendant giving on christams who calls you princess' isn't something you can deal with then give him to me and move on to someone who can live up to your standards. uugh

Mesonfielde · Answer

You should then take the lead and get a ticket to a cinema on Valentine's day to watch Deadpool.

existing_not_living · Answer

Wow. You really don't deserve a boyfriend like that if all you can about is not feeling special on a single day. Sure, it's V-Day, but there are plenty of single people that have NO ONE to celebrate that day with so therefore, they really don't celebrate it. You have someone who obviously cares a lot about you. He got you a diamond pendant for goodness sake. Isn't that enough? You got lucky seeing as how he's your first boyfriend. How about you appreciate what you do have instead of complaining about what you don't on the internet? Or, if you do complain, complain about something that actually matters.

Cmasterson · Answer

I think you're looking at it too much and comparing others to your relationship, first off I see his point and I don't think you should let a day define how important your partner is to you. Every relationship is different why would you want yours to be the same as others? Others only tell and show what they want to, who know what goes behind closed doors, men and women shouldn't have to feel obligated to buy their partner things on valentines day just because its a day. I told my boyfriend I didn't really celebrate the day, and at first he was shocked but he didn't mind, he treats everyday like i'm special to him so whats that one day going to change?

JuicyBrain · Answer

Are you 12 ? Seriously !
Grow up. Valentine's day is only there to sell flowers and shit. If he treats you well, you shouldn't have a problem with that. Do you really need to be bought shit you don't need to feel loved? What the hell are you going to do with a teddy bear? You are an adult?

SpeakNoEvil · Answer

Okay so you were fine until someone else said something to you? I mean if he doesn't like Valentine's Day then let him get you stuff whenever he wants to. Who gives a shit what anyone else thinks?
Also, who cares if he doesn't call you queen? If he told you to call him 'king' all the time you'd be like 'no that's stupid'

Cusco_Othriyas · Answer

Look. He skips out a day engineered to milk money out of idiots who don't know better and went on to save the money to get you something better later in the year. I think you should consider yourself lucky. You may also want to take a second look at everything you believe. Don't believe everything you hear. Because I can tell you for certain most of the things and beliefs spread through hearsay by materialistic people are wrong.

Dandeus · Answer

Valentine's day is a fake holiday engineered to guilt trip men into spending money on chocolates, flowers, jewelry and cards. It's the second most profitable holiday for the greeting card industry behind Christmas. Behavior that would be seen as charming and thoughtful on any other day of the year becomes a social obligation to keep up with the rat race and maintain the status quo.

JoshuaGema · Answer

Honestly i need to know about how your boyfriend grew up, depressive syndrome perhaps combined with bad e, periences around holidays and a non traditional upbringing... keep communication open. Is he treating you how he wants to be treated? Everyone is different.

Anonymous · Answer

This is exactly what's wrong with love today. I WANT EVERYONE TO READ.

When you love someone, you are busy thinking of ways to express yourself to them, instead of finding ways to have them get you things.

Respectfully, how "special" have you made him feel?

MissMcK · Answer

Material gifts aren't a necessity, he just doesn't like the concept of the day and that's okay. It doesn't mean you're not special to him. Just being together and showing your appreciation with love is the best gift you can ever give!

Baskervillian26 · Answer

This is what I got from reading this:
"I heard guys that don't do things for girls on V-Day are selfish. I want him to buy me things and give me stuff and call me a different name because no girl wants to be a princess."

Anonymous · Answer

Are you planning to get him something for Valentine's day or are you expecting him to buy you stuff in the relationship?

noniedalestith · Answer

don't count your sheep. I did last year my ex said the same thing but
he said he had to work second shift on the 13th he left 2 hours early no big deal got a call around 8pm telling me he has to work over time I should just go to bed now I trust him but I called his boss to just check and he wasn't lying I go to bed I wake up my room is full of heart balloons a giant teddy roses and he walked in and said I told you I had to work
and gave me my engagement ring

MattATL · Answer

A lot of guys feel like the opportunity to spoil their girlfriend gets wasted on days like this, because its just "expected." Especially if he isn't super rich, it probably bums him out that he has to spend money on Feb 14 for gifts just to keep the status quo, when he could buy those same things on Feb 21, and he would be a super boyfriend.
If he bought you a diamond necklace on Cmas, he is not selfish. He just doesn't tow the line. As long as its only about the holiday, I'd say you're fine.

Indigocloud · Answer

You're wearing a diamond he bought and you call him selfish? You really like to follow the crowd don't you? If a girl gets chocolates you want some too. If she is called queen you want to be called it too.

Anonymous · Answer

I agree with a lot of people here, he treats you any other day you can't expect the world just on one day... yeah sure a lot of people take part in V-Day but its just another day...

Tomsta · Answer

Valentines day is just a way for companies to drum up business and inflate prices, you don't need one specific day to show your love for someone you should be doing that everyday anyway

Anonymous · Answer

If he can't just have fun with it, then I think you're in for a love-less future. Those things are ok to not like but I mean really, what's the big deal?

Sweetart2 · Answer

I think he might want to surprise you. If he doesn't do anything, break up with him because he's a controlling jerk.

takumii · Answer

Maybe he has bad memories of valentines day. Or  Maybe he Is planning a surprise for you.

My boyfriend says he won't celebrate Valentine's Day or get me anything?

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