Why Men Don't Like Rom-Com?

[Anonymous]

This guy I start dating he said he doesn't like romantic movie that much. And I kinda notice that a lot of men say that too.
Why?

[Rawrzz]

Good question. To answer this question, you have to understand the difference between men and women. Our biological goals are different.

Both males and females tend to project their own desires on to the other. Guys send dick pics, because they think "I would love it if a chick sent me a pussy pic." So why do guys love seeing naked women, no matter; and, women are turned off by it?

This originates from our separate reproductive methods, and ultimately our differing reproductive resources. Women have eggs; men have sperm. Sperm is effectively infinite. Eggs, however, are finite. A woman can only use one egg per 9 months. This leads to a difference in sexual goals.

A man is being most biologically advantageous when he uses as much sperm as possible, since, of course, it's an infinite resource. A woman, however, is being most biologically advantageous when she considers very, very carefully which male is the best male to get a shot at fertalizing her egg. If she messes up and gets with a subpar male, then she loses 9 months of potential reproductive time. The way she determines which male is sufficient for her egg is based on feelings: love. If she feels good about the guy, that's her subconscious giving her the okay that his value is sufficient to get a shot at her egg.

These are instinctual feelings, not conscious ones. There is also a lot of difference in human behavior, as you see in the comments. Not all women love rom-coms. Not all men hate rom-coms. These differences are more a result of belief or experience, tacked over the instinctual feelings. This is why human behavior is so diverse: belief + experience + social influence + instinct + genetic predispositons/abberations. Some are more instinctual, some are less.

Now, to your question. Rom-com's are essentially women actualizing their sexual desires. Somewhat similar to men while watching porn. Both genders can actively watch both, but they are affected differently.

The default is that women view sex mentally. Stories get them off. Dedication gets them off. Romance gets them off. They think "Oh, I would love to have a man like that who would do so much for me." Sex is physical to men. All we need is to see a nice body, and we're good, the vast majority of us. That is why more women like rom-coms, while a lot of men don't care about them.

In essence, rom-coms are female porn.

[Mimi_8]

Thanks for the bio lesson. Pretty accurate though.

[Rawrzz]

@Mimi_8 I usually go through it, because it's something I think most people--or at least a lot, particularly in the West--misunderstand. Men get confused on why women have to "think about" how they feel about them or "don't know" how they feel about them--they need the time to process, which guys do not; women get confused on why their guy still feels the need to look at other women, etc. Bunch of other stuff.

[Mimi_8]

That's true. I guess women have more to worry about and process.

[belindaskyler]

Oh come on, not all guys want the physical stuff only. Some guys are very emotional when it comes to the girl they like. And many guys care about relationships. I can prove it. Simply go to Quora and check the amount of questions some guys ask to save a relationship!

[Rawrzz]

@belindaskyler
A: Clearly you did not read what I wrote, because I went to the extra cognitive extent to make sure that I included an entire paragraph dedicated to the diversity of human behavior.

B: I also included motivators. Social influence and belief, notably. Why do you think guys are "very emotional" when it comes to a girl they like? What is their motivator?

Men learn what women like and what they don't like over time. You think that if a guy really did only want sex, he would go up to a chick and say "Hey, can I fuck you in your ass?" How would that go over? Guys learn very quickly that that doesn't work, unless they are super top tier males. They are enforced to be emotional, because women like that. Like I said. Dedication.

And of course they want to "save" a relationship. It's their source of sex. It's pretty much the *only* source of sex, because that is what women (and society) expect before putting out.

[Rawrzz]

@belindaskyler And it seems like you misunderstood one of the last sentences.

To women, sex is an expression of love. It is nothing else, to the vast majority. They need it to be an expression of love, because love is how they measure whether or not sex is worth the increased risk to them.

To men, sex can be an expression of love, but it can also be nothing but a purely physical release. Because it is low risk, there is no need for love to measure risk.

This is notable in the significantly reduced orgasms that women get from meaningless sex. They *need* sex to be meaningful. Men do not. I could walk up to any 100 attractive women, fuck them all, and have great, amazing sex without knowing a thing about any of them. The vast majority of women cannot do that. That is the difference I was talking about.

I was not saying "all men care about is sex."

[belindaskyler]

Wow, you sure do know a lot ;D
Well, yes, that is very true on the majority of male human beings. But it doesn't add up to me because I used to have a classmate who had a huge crush on a girl for 6 years, and he was never intending to have sex with her. And how do I know that? Because he was only 13, and the closest thing he could get in terms of physical moves would be a kiss. He was *in love* with her. He said it himself.

Do you fail to believe that all he wanted was a hookup after admiring her for 6 years? Or do you think he really wanted a relationship? And he wasn't even desperate. I liked him, yet he didn't do anything about it. He liked that girl that much... It can't be only physical attraction.

No offence intended by the way. Just trying to rationalize :)

[Rawrzz]

@belindaskyler Teenage puppy love. Happens to pretty much everyone. Neurochemicals get released which make you high on a person. Literally drugged up. That isn't love. It's your brain trying to convince you to have sex and reproduce. Particularly in puberty. Trust me. 99% of 13 year old boys want sex, very very badly, so would that boy.

But. Even if he didn't want sex, one instance doesn't prove the general rule. Like I said. There are a lot of exceptions, because experience covers up instinct. Some women can sleep around and love doing so; men can become priests and suppress their sex drive, forever celibate. There are humans who refuse to have children. These things aren't natural, aren't instinctual, but they still happen because of other factors like I said: belief, experience, social ideas, etc.

There's a difference between what a person wants instinctually and what they want rationally. But instinct is generally a lot more powerful.

[belindaskyler]

Alright I get you.. so we've come to the conclusion that love is unrequited, deluded and something that is never reciprocated by the male gender.

... and, does that mean a man can never love his wife? I fail to believe that he can't.

[Rawrzz]

@belindaskyler I don't think you do get me. -.-;; Of course a man can love his wife. We both love. We simply love *in a different way*, initially. Love plays different roles for males and females at the start.

If it wasn't true that males could love, then tens of/hundreds of thousands of males wouldn't die protecting their wives and gfs.

If anything, males express their love more than females do, in that way: they sacrifice everything just for her safety.

Although sure, love is delusional. And then, it really depends on what type of love you're talking about. People perceive it in a bunch of ways. So it really just depends on what you're talking about when you say "love".

[belindaskyler]

Yeah I get you. And its nice to know, I was about to lose my shit about guys and their ways lol...

Guys are just so disconnected with their emotions that it just seems impossible for them to care about girls. And it's freakin hard to differentiate the 'hook up guys' from the 'relationship material' guys. But hey, thanks for your two cents :)

[squatch]

To me a rom-com is like an overcooked frozen cheese pizza. Boring, slightly stale, overplayed, cheesy in a bad way, lacking substance, and overall unappealing.

Simply said, they are boring and trite. The cheese factor is cringe worthy and it has all of the cliche cards in spades. I prefer movies that make me think, or surprise me at the end. That, and anything that was like Deadpool. Because Deadpool was hilarious.

[chintita]

why (most) men don't like pop music? why (most) men don't like the color pink?
answer: because they are boring and don't like anything they consider "feminine"

[Iron_Man]

I always have liked Pop music

[chintita]

@Iron_Man you are probably secure in your masculinity unlike a lot of guys :)

[Iron_Man]

I am and also I growed up on pop music along with many other styles of music

[Maxemeister]

I don't like pop music? I'm pretty sure I'm secure in my masculinity, last I checked!

*checks again*

YUP! STILL THERE!

[chintita]

@Maxemeister mhm, do you say no homo whenever you compliment a guy?

[Maxemeister]

Nope! If I compliment a guy then that's that!

I prefer rock, m'self!

[chintita]

@Maxemeister alright then... you win this one
politickles.com/.../eyes-on-you.jpg

[Maxemeister]

Affirmative!

https://i.imgur.com/TMV1KKM.gif

[Rawrzz]

The color pink is the best color, actually. The ideal color. I wonder how you feel about things you consider "masculine"?

[Maxemeister]

@Rawrzz Actually pink has nothing to do with feminity, but u gotta admit, it's eyekill. LOOK AT IT! IT HURTS on this website!

[chintita]

@Rawrzz like what? i like a lot of supposedly "masculine" things.

[Maxemeister]

chintita! Don't u hate the pink?

[Rawrzz]

@Maxemeister Just think about what is pink, and you'll get it.

@chintita I'm wondering if you're trying to demonize males for not wanting to be women.

[Maxemeister]

@Rawrzz I don't hate pink, but I hate hot pink

[chintita]

@Rawrzz i'm not trying to demonize anything :/ i just like feminine things and get sad when people bash em. are u trying to start a conspiracy against me :P

[chintita]

@Maxemeister i love the color pink, boo :P

[Rawrzz]

Okay. Good. No, I'm not. I'm just conditioned into gender war mode on gag. >.>;

[chintita]

@Rawrzz lmao, it's alright i love masculine men so i wouldn't want them to be feminine either.

[Rawrzz]

media.giphy.com/media/ZtB2l3jHiJsFa/giphy.gif

[belindaskyler]

Come on, do we girls like Star wars and Batman? Not as much as they do, right?

Its just a biological thing, nothing personal.

[RJGraveyTrain]

Unrealistic-poorly-written cheese fests aren't my bag either.

[GymBumGuy]

i.kinja-img.com/.../abdeqocgqj2tqk5abukz.jpg
i think 50 first dates was a great movie if that counts want peanut butter cups in your eggs! lol

[00Lelouchxx]

It's female humor.

Male humor is funny universal. Everybody likes and everyone can relate becuaee nine times out of ten it just random thing normal people go through. Then its just guy humor like my balls and tea bagging another guy.

Female humor like brides maid is geeky and talking about my boobs and vagina. and guy can't relate to that.

That why a lot people say female aren't funny its not that they are funny its just there unrelatable

[HeWhoPonders]

The same reason you don't like us watching porn.

Just like porn gives us men an unrealistic expectation of your bodies, Romantic Comedies or any romantic movies at that, give you unrealistic expectations of our everything.

[FakeName123]

For the same reason that women often don't like big action movies. Because men and women are very different and Rom-Coms appeal to female interest-cues while Action movies do the same for male interest-cues.

[DarkHumorRUs]

I started liking them when I ran out of good comedy/horror movies to watch.

[performerwannabe]

I suggest 'How to lose a guy in 10 days'

[DarkHumorRUs]

@performerwannabe cool I'll watch it.

[performerwannabe]

Great! I think that this movie needs more credit.

[DarkHumorRUs]

@performerwannabe I'll watch it when I'm thirty. I forgot to add that I usually only watch them if they have younger people or else I don't really care about the characters.

[performerwannabe]

Hahahaha omg😂😂
You would laugh your ass off but never mind. You could watch "10 things I hate about you" then. These are my top 2 favorite movies.😊

[DarkHumorRUs]

@performerwannabe yeah I've seen that one.

[performerwannabe]

Oi, what did ya think then?

[DarkHumorRUs]

@performerwannabe that one was great.

[yololoyo]

'Cuz we don't actually listen to the movie, our focus is on you jeez

[Casstiel]

Because we don't wanna be romantic we just wanna be sexy. Were just acting like a romantic person for sex. Sorry bros I just explained our plans 😆

[Nathan4204]

No, you just explained to her your own plan.

[ConsultantIsBack]

If it's well made, good acting I like a good rom-com. Bonus points for sex scenes.

[Anpu23]

Just doesn't hold our interest often. I liked a few, but it's certainly not my first pick.

[dudeman]

because they end up with the slut getting the good guy. no thanks i dont do fantasy.

[Peachhhfuzz]

WOW what the hell lol. What movies did you watch? Trainwreck?

[dudeman]

@Peachhhfuzz i did watch trainwreck why does that matter.

[Maxemeister]

1. Badly-written
2. Unrealistic
3. Poorly casted

GIMME SOME TARANTINO, please

[Peachhhfuzz]

He did True Romance.. that's a Rom com

[Maxemeister]

@Peachhhfuzz 1. He WROTE True Romance
2. That was an incredible movie, but it was not all romance. That was like 3/4 action. Actually it has just about as much romance as most movies
3. Where's the com?
4. Christopher Walken doesn't DO RomComs!

[Peachhhfuzz]

What do you mean where's the com? All Tarantino films are filled with comedy!

[Maxemeister]

@Peachhhfuzz Tru, tru, but it's not the same TYPE of comedy that Rom Coms have!

Lol Tarantino doesn't do Rom Coms

[blondfrog]

Most guys don't and I don't either it just doesn't appeal to me.

[performerwannabe]

They don't like romantic stuff in general.

[musicbrain5]

Why? Because he has good taste in movies.

[Iron_Man]

If i am with a girl I like them

[Decentguy]

i do like romantic movies.

[Nerdvana]

I like them. Great date movies

[7André7]

i find those movie boring

[Polocrew]

I like brom com OP, 21-22 jumpstreet