Because women killed it. See originally women where ladylike and men where gentlmen but then women watned more, they wanted men to be chivalrous and to provide for them and do things for them BUT they watned to the respect and honors men had for all the chivalrous behavior. Basically men got respect by treating women well, by providing for his family and by fighting for his country. That was what they got for that, women wanted that but they also wanted men to continue doing these things for them so they created the modern system. Basically women can (and frequently do) do what they want be what they want and be treated as mens equals and not adhere to their traditional gender role. However men still very much have to adhere to their gender role, still treat women as special but then also treat them as equals (see the problem with that? They are mutually exclusive either you get special treatment or you get treated like everyone else.). This basically put a massive strain on men because now they where no longer getting the respect they once did for performing these tasks, they no longer had the admiration or love of their wifes, mothers, daughters instead they had even more obligations and no real reason to follow through with them. Without any postive reinforment, when women get the praise and the man gets the work he no longer has any reason to do said work. I hold the door for a woman and thats just something a man is supposte to do because women are special and I as a man I am nothing more then a servant, its no longer me being chivalrous. She is my equal but I still have to cater to her, so how is she my equal? Meanwhile being taken for granted is bad enough but then other women started complaining about the behavior, that he was being sexist for catering to her needs and wants, he was a bad person for doing what women wanted him to do. So of course men are going to stop if women hate them for being chivalrous. Then even worse are the women who tell men their sexist pigs for being chivalrous but they better not stop because women are special and also mens equals so men should do as their told. This essentially makes men decide that its not worth it. Its a catch 22 they no matter what they do cannot win so screw it. Thats why men are no longer chivalrous because women take it for granted and even punish men for doing so. In short women killed chivalry then ironically enough complain about how its dead as if its some kind of mystery why.
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It's a result of third-wave feminism and progression of a leftist society. Men are not acting chivalrous as a response to how society is progressing in the west. Men are constantly shamed for doing chivalrous things because it comes across as 'creepy' or overbearing. Women in general these days go after someone who is much more crude and selfish. Women might say they want chivalrous men but I see them all the time making fun of them. I think @puppylove94 made a take on this.
What women really want is a man who is respectful to her. However, in the past I'll admit I've dated guys who are just plain jerks to me because I think they are hot. For some reason all the "chivalrous" guys were just weird and unattractive. Like one prom date opened all doors for me, paid for dinner, etc, but sneezed and then ate his expelled mucas.
As I got older, I just got tired of this. I'll note, however, I went on a date with a guy who was really hot and super chivalrous in paying and opening doors, but also showed no interest or enthusiasm when I talked about my life passions ( poverty, homelessness, working in international law).
Then I met my current boyfriend. He never let's me pay at restaurants, and holds doors open for me, opens the car door for me when I'm getting in, buys me gifts, took care of me like a child when I was hospitalized from sickness, and even makes me dinner sometimes, on top of countless other things. He also listens to my dreams, my social issue rants, and supports them. In return I'm the person he talks to about emotional stuff that makes him cry, although " guys are so unemotional and only care about sex". I buy him genuine gifts and do my best to make him feel loved and appreciated.
My point is, I don't think there are less chivalrous men. I've noticed that, whether we like it or not, when a man really loves a woman he wants to take care of her and appreciate her. And the woman wants to make her man feel loved. I think chivalry is just changing a little with modern times and feminism. Men and women are just trying to find a balance with each other.
I challenge you that men are still chivalrous at least when it comes to opening doors.
So for the next few months, notice what happens when you come to a door that needs to be opened. Do you or someone near you rush faster than others to get the door or hold the door open longer? If so, thank them.
I bet you will be surprised to realize that chivalry still lives. It does. It is called common courtesy by another name.
But as for why you fear it may be absent, it may be like others have said that women no longer appreciate it or even condemn it but I do not think that is true. I think it is still around but I do not think it is getting less and less but I think it has more to do with the fact that men are being raised without fathers and only mothers. So the things like opening a door, walking on the outside of traffic, pulling out chairs, etc. these things just aren't being taught to young men. So if there is a fall off, I would think it has more to do with that than a women being offended by it. I just don't know enough men that would be stopped from doing these things if a women was offended. (Thank God!)
We would all be in trouble if men stopped doing things because a woman got her feelings hurt. lol!
Besides porn and the feminist movement. A lot of it has to due with how they were raised and taught. A lot of them don't have father figures to teach them, some do have them around, but their fathers aren't traditional and also was macking around women too. Its really is sad. That just also adds to my list of never dating. These guys are not men, but males and cowards most of the time because of how society have drastically changed and done to the male psyche. The same is with women. Sadly the women are equally as responsible for what they are doing to men. So you will have to be ready to wait a while until you encounter somebody who knows how to treat a lady the way she needs to be treated. Also its how you carry yourself as a woman. Even some of the most trashes men I've encountered opened doors for me, I tell them thank you and they even compliment me when I don't even look for it. I also say it has to do if they sense if your a good woman or a woman who likes to just sleep around to.
Because feminazis. Putting an entire gender on a pedestal just because? I wouldn't want to do that for males, so why would I want others to feel obligated to do that for me.
I want to feel like I earned those niceities. It's like when someone says I should "respect my elders". No. I was raised to respect what has earned respect. You do NOT earn respect because you happened to have been born before me. You had no power, no contribution on that occurrence. Just like females did not put work into being born a female.
Everyone seriously needs to take a prolonged step down from their high horse and stop thinking they "deserve" everything.
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Because chivalry is benevolent sexism, and women now are closer to equal treatment than ever before.
Because times have changed
Man wants to be head of the family?
Then: Men get respect from peers and are considered to be a real man
Now: PATRIARCHY !!
Man compliments woman
Then: They might talk privately later or something along those lines
Now: Sexual harassment !
Man holds door open for woman
Then: Woman says thanks
Now. Sexist rapist men everywhere ! Holding open doors, who do they think they are ! ?
Woman hits man
Then: Almost unheard of
Now: She didn't like your ring tone (watch below)
https://www.liveleak.com/view?i=887_1478313192
etc. the list goes on. . . Times have really changed, and you gotta move with the times.
i3.kym-cdn.com/.../3e9.png
if you don't you'll get left behind and your shit will get fucked up
media.giphy.com/media/QDK1pCI43lGhO/giphy.gifi will list some reasons :
1- if you give women you will rarely get them, i mean sure giving them once in a while will make them like you but if you keep giving like its a chore you lose that woman who takes you for granted, fks the other guy and makes you her friend.
2- iam usually nice to everyone especially girls , i have no problem helping a girl, but some girls just act weird, dont say anything, dont thank you or give any kind of reaction which tbh is an insult.
3- Some women simply are bitches and dont really deserve that kind of treatment from men.
4- some men only treat women they want to date like that mainly because its too much work sometimes to keep being a gentleman to every girl you meet.
Keep in midn most guys have no problem being chivalrous , i know i dont, but when you get nothing in return and you find that not caring a lot about the girl or her well being brings the same results if not better sometimes you start to wonder why you should go out of your way to be chivalrous.I still am. But I'm very careful about how open I am with women. Because I get tired of acting like Raoul Vicomte de Chagny; only to be treated like Jeffery Dahmer in return.
Women say they want whatever the hell that guy is that Favio was always playing on the cover of all those trash novels. I've got the smoothness and treatment, but I don't tolerate BS or abuse and I have been told I look like a chinchilla. So instead of being treated like him, I get treated like America's Most Wanted.
All I can think to say to all that:
"Evil will never leave the house of one who pays back evil for good." - Proverbs 17:13.
Needless to say, I know a lot of women who wonder why their lives are so full of disaster; and why they always feel like there's some sort of cosmic conspiracy against them. And all of them at some point, repaid my treating them right with them throwing me under the bus.
And you may or may not be religious; but it sure isn't me visiting all that revenge on them. Kinda makes you wonder, doesn't it?Men and women got fucked up now. So much media and stuff messed up everyone. First the bad boy was just a character nobody did. Now everybody is doing that character. If a boy is not he's considered gay or doormat.
Now so like women. Now people tell them (feminists tell them) they've been treateth not right or not equal by men doing chivalrous. Everyone in the media is doing it unknowned. they do not even know it.
Now women and men are messed up. Women or the girls now thinking that being chivalrous is creepy. Men thinking that being chivalrous is being gay or not dominant and they do all bad things and be mysgonist to women/girls and they like it.
This is just the best example of "media messed up." Smh bad is becoming good and good is becoming bad and that switch is starting to become normal in the younger ages and being taught at younger ages is reminded and done at the older ages so. It will head over to the 30s people and older.
I litteraly don't want to experience the time when i need to tell my son to call a girl a bitch so he can get a girl. I rather be dead.Third wave feminism is to blame really. And men are usually shamed for doing such acts. I've heard and seen it. So it can be quite disheartening. Why should anyone make a effort when they get shut downed and blamed and accused of shitty things. I Sure wouldn't.
I think the question is "Why aren't many individuals chivalrous nowadays?"
I hear this word more often associated to just towards men, as If they are the only sex to show acts of kindness and respect towards a woman. Such as, holding a door, opening the passenger side door for her or even paying for dinner reservations. I think its the society of today's people that lead men and women in the opposite directions. Nowadays, more women aren't loyal or grateful to those men who act "chivalrous or respectful" and categorize them as boring. Or women who have an attractiveness towards "bad boys" who shows the least courtesy. This goes the same for men who seek girls who are shallow-minded and only care about themselves.
Its like me and my crush, we talk to each other and yet he's much of a gentlemen to me. Not because I "expect" him to be that way, its because I have good manners and I show respect of being a decent human being for him to treat me the same way.That's not chivalry, actual real chivalry actually has very little to do with women out of the entire code only one line/sentence if even that has to do with the treatment of women the rest has to do with etiquette on and off the battlefield has well as how you should act in general.
what you are referring to is being a gentleman please do your research and get the two right ^^.
But to answer your question women did it to themselves with the introduction of 2nd and 3rd wave feminism.
Though fear not some of us are still gentleman.A world cannot have both chivalrous men and equality between the sexes.
Pick your side.
Chivalry is traditionally defined as a man being nice to a woman purely because he is a man and she is a woman. That's also sexist. Placing women above men. And in a world striving for equality... the two can't exist together.The answer can be found in my take
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a27581-5-reasons-why-fewer-men-want-to-take-girls-out-on-dates-these-days
The overall reason is chivalry does not score you any points in getting relationship with a girl. Women care about 3 things 1) Money 2) Looks 3) Social status. A combination of these 3 things is all they care about and a guy who has these 3 things in high amount can literally treat women like dog shit and most women would stay with him.
While an average guy could be chivalrous and kind guy in world and this wouldn't score him much points with younger woman. Older woman might appreciate it because less people are being nice to them and might get them relationships but younger girls will not especially seeing a lot of girls these days tend to be very gold diggerish.Today's society wants more equal treatment, which means chivalry has taken a few steps back. Which means no more holding doors open just because you're a woman, no more only men paying the bills.
What I find amusing is that when equality is gained, which feminists demanded, suddenly they start complaining about how men avoid marriage, some men avoid relationships, holding doors open and even stop paying all the dinner bills.
That is what equality is all about. No one gets treated differently, regardless of sex.
Total equality means no special treatment for either sex.Why aren't women ladylike enough to warrant chivalry anymore?
I mean, I know HOW they aren't ladylike. Fat, rude, loud, fat, sarcastic, demeaning to the men in their lives, narcissistic, so very VERY fat, entitled... I could go on, but I don't feel like writing a series of novels.
But WHY?
Hint: I know why, and I don't care. I'm just here to point out that my chicken came well before your egg, and men took a LOT of shit to get to where they are now with how they regard women, and aren't a damn sight anywhere near as bad as we could be because A) we're just that nice, or in my case B) if we treated women 10% as poorly as they deserve for what's become commonly acccepted behavior from them, we'd be arrested or shot on the spot by police.Depends on where you are looking... you aren't looking in the right place. I'm one... in NJ;-)
Society has push a lot of guys to the point that they don't see a reason to act like that. Most girls never even say thank you... when you hold a door, pull out a seat, help them with something heavy.
Everywhere a guy looks all he sees is the world/girls saying that they don't need men, etc. If girls appreciated it... more men would be. The fact is most girls fall/like bad boys/jerks which aren't nice/chivalrous guys. Women are the reason we are a dying breed.Plenty are.
But a lot of girls are actually rude to guys who wanna be chivalrous to them. Crazy to me lol.Probably because they are sick of women snapping at them for no reason or being accused of trying to get into her knickers.
If I was being benevolent to a guy and he accused me of seducing him, I would be like. Get yersel tae fuck, that's the last time I ever help you.Men are chivalrous, boys are not. Most boys now do not want to hear anything from older Men on how they should proceed with life. This isn't me sounded like a "old guy" it's just facts. Boys have no respect or manners in this day and age. On the other hand before I got married almost every woman I dated hated that I held the door for them, waited for them to be seated at a table and did common things a mad should do. They felt "lesser" because I did such things. They felt that i was looking at them as if they needed help or some type of special privilege. This could be farther from the truth.
When feminists burned their bras and decided in the 60's and 70's that men were being sexist when they were pulling out chairs and opening doors, men stopped. "A real woman can open her own doors", etc. Men learned quickly that since they don't know what a woman wants, they needed to not take the risk of offending women by doing the chivalrous things. It was safer not to. Now woman complain that men don't do these things and just blame the man. You have those leftist PC women (idiots?) to blame, not men who got tired of being called something they were not. Maybe the non PC women can bring it back?
I feel like people are just generally more selfish than ever now a days. I'm not saying it's just men. Chivalry is basically in my mind a sign of respect. Both genders can hold doors open for people or make sure their friends and family get home safe. But so many people refuse to do anything genuinely nice anymore. Older people still do because they were raised that way.
But younger people it seems are more selfish and only do things if they are going to get something in return. Unfortunately some people see chivalry as a way to get sex and if that is not what they get in return you get anger.
Other people don't see why they should be polite at all since it's easier to
be selfish.
There are still some good people out there. But you just have to be careful.I believe women have done an equally good job of getting in the way. We also have an array of options yet we settle too often for something that is too easy. Our digital age has transformed how we date, in general. I don't think men lack the ability to be as such, we just have to allow the right platform to accept it and be thankful.
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