For the record, I respect a person's need for privacy, I don't feel entitled to know something that my boyfriend doesn't want to share with me and I trust him.
However, he recently had to go to the hospital after becoming very sick. He abruptly told me to leave the room when the doc came in and I sat waiting alone for hours until he was done. When we left he wouldn't tell me what they found or explain the medication they gave him, nor why he had to return in the morning for more tests, which he also would not elaborate on.
I get it, some guys can feel self-conscious when they're not well, or feel like they'd seem weak, or whatever million reasons they have for not wanting to open up to their partner when they're ill.
We have a very good relationship and communication is something we are very careful with. He's a great man and I have his back no matter what. But I'm heartbroken. I now feel like he doesn't respect me as his equal and partner and that he doesn't trust me to confide in.
I tried to explain this to him, he got defensive and twisted my words to sound like an attack. Since I was already upset and tired from being at the hospital with him all night, I stormed out of the room and cried alone. I hate crying in front of him, plus I didn't want to escalate it further.
A while later he said he was going to his parent's house for a few days and would talk to me later. That's it. He just up and left for an indefinite amount of time because I expressed concern about keeping his health a secret from me. Can anyone add a little insight? Why is he so angry? Am I wrong to feel so hurt and offended by his secrecy and unwillingness to hear anything on subject? Can any of you relate to him from personal experience and shed some light on this for me? Or suggest a way to approach this?
Although our relationship has been otherwise solid, I feel like this is a deal breaker. I feel untrusted, unworthy and small. If he's hiding sh*t like this, should I stay so trusting?
However, he recently had to go to the hospital after becoming very sick. He abruptly told me to leave the room when the doc came in and I sat waiting alone for hours until he was done. When we left he wouldn't tell me what they found or explain the medication they gave him, nor why he had to return in the morning for more tests, which he also would not elaborate on.
I get it, some guys can feel self-conscious when they're not well, or feel like they'd seem weak, or whatever million reasons they have for not wanting to open up to their partner when they're ill.
We have a very good relationship and communication is something we are very careful with. He's a great man and I have his back no matter what. But I'm heartbroken. I now feel like he doesn't respect me as his equal and partner and that he doesn't trust me to confide in.
I tried to explain this to him, he got defensive and twisted my words to sound like an attack. Since I was already upset and tired from being at the hospital with him all night, I stormed out of the room and cried alone. I hate crying in front of him, plus I didn't want to escalate it further.
A while later he said he was going to his parent's house for a few days and would talk to me later. That's it. He just up and left for an indefinite amount of time because I expressed concern about keeping his health a secret from me. Can anyone add a little insight? Why is he so angry? Am I wrong to feel so hurt and offended by his secrecy and unwillingness to hear anything on subject? Can any of you relate to him from personal experience and shed some light on this for me? Or suggest a way to approach this?
Although our relationship has been otherwise solid, I feel like this is a deal breaker. I feel untrusted, unworthy and small. If he's hiding sh*t like this, should I stay so trusting?
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