Why do I have to get awkward around a girl I like?

[Anonymous]

I talk to much, act like a freaking 5 year old, and I just feel so desperate for her. :( I literally can't help it though. she probably hates me. why can't I just act cool and normal?

[YouKnowThatGuy]

You need to stop caring what people think. It's a cycle. The more you worry about how others think of you, the more likely they are to view you negatively. There are MILLIONS of women out there. You should get a retail job for the social experience alone. You will realize 1. you will likely come into contact with at least half a dozen very attractive women on a daily basis during a busy day. 2. You'll have to talk to them and do your job professionally. You get comfortable doing it, then it will get easier to do, and before you know it, it won't be such a big deal.

This girl isn't the last girl on the planet, and you will meet SO many more women sooner than you think. If you blew your shot with her, you blew it, move on. Why sulk about a blown opportunity? The opportunity has passed by, it's gone. Learn from the mistake and move on.

[Asker]

It's just she's the girl I didn't want to blow it with. :(

[YouKnowThatGuy]

I know where you are coming from man, trust me. There was this girl two years back. Perfect in every respect. Smart, funny, beautiful, little personality quirks that drove me nuts. The full 9. I played it wrong in a bunch of ways and she lost interest in me. That's how it goes. I learned to move on. You aren't even AT that point yet. You don't even KNOW for certain that she isn't interest.

Stop calling it game over when the it's not even half time yet.

[Asker]

say if I did screw things up though and moved on. would there even be a slight chance that in time, she might come back to me? I hate this feeling of being stuck on someone.

[YouKnowThatGuy]

In my experience, no. Once she declares no interest you have two options. 1. Move on and forget her, knowing you will meet more like her or 2. Not move and and not forget her, literally WASTING good months/years of your life fighting a battle you can't win A.K.A. this girls heart.

That's only IF she lost interest. From your attitude though? Its only a matter of time before she does. You appear to be extremely negative. Women will pick up on that and they WILL lose interest. It's in your hands.

[derrick112]

Sounds like you either have social anxiety or very little experience interacting with girls or both. The reason you behave awkwardly around her is because you care about what she thinks of you. For example: If you're hanging out with a girl who you have no interest in you're not going to care what she thinks of you therefore you won't behave awkwardly. The only way to build social confidence with women is by practicing. Think of a video game, the more you play the better you get. Same thing here, the more time you spend socializing with girls, the better you get at it.

I was in your shoes at one point and when I got a job working at Target I would interact with girls all day long and I noticed my awkwardness with women slowly begin to fade as time went on.

[xkml21264x]

This isn't exactly something that someone can fix for you. If you really are acting like this, it's probably because you like this girl so much, that whenever you are in her presence, you just lose your common sense. Everything goes out the window because you want her to like you as much as you like her. Being able to act cool and normal around her is something that will come with time, when you feel more comfortable around her. Being awkward around someone is not something that you just do. The awkwardness is something that happens whenever somebody meets someone else that they have strong feelings for. It will go away and get better, just give it time. And next time you see her, just try to relax, and breathe. That's important :)

[Asker]

yeah but if the "damage" is already done and she thinks I'm a weirdo then what does it matter? my feelings for her mean nothing :(

[xkml21264x]

But how do you know for sure? That's what you think because you know that you are not acting like yourself because you are so nervous around her. She might not think that it's as bad as your making it up in your mind. She might like you and you don't even know it. You can't let what you think stop you from talking to her. And even if she does have questionable feelings for you, it's not permanent, you can always fix it, if necessary. Don't assume that you know what she thinks. Keep trying :)

[Kay-Young]

i do the same.. I totally understand where you're coming from. I think you need to chill. try to see her the same way you see your other girl friends.

when some guys like me, and tries to act so cool and stuff and get my attention, it is sometimes working but most of the time its a turn off. I mean stop being so desperate! you know what I'm saying. Show her you're interested but show her this in small things and remind her every time that you wanna be a good friend who can always be there but also that you think about her alot! :)

[blufrenzy93]

I know exactly where you're coming from...as much as we wanna be cool around the people we like, it never goes as plan. Why do some people get awkward ? I guess it's because of nervousness and generally liking the person so much that we don't wanna screw things up.

The only thing that seems to work for me is time. The more I see and chill with the person, the more comfortable I am around them.

[Asker]

well if I never get the chance, then it doesn't matter, I still left a horrible impression on her, even though deep inside I personally know I'd never do her wrong. love is just stupid.

[blufrenzy93]

No, don't say that. If you talked too much when you were with her, you probably gave off "nervous" vibes. I don't think she hates you. Give it other go. If you got her number, then give her a call. Ask her on a date. If it helps, simply say "I'm sorry if I ramble...I tend to do that around pretty girls." ;]

[feelthisway]

i get super awkward around the guy I like. I can't help it. we're only human. I always turn shy, I can't even say hi or smile unless he does either first. but its kinda cute. its OK to be this way, to most girls its pretty cute. I remember I had a class with this guy and id always catch him looking at me. I'm pretty sure he liked me because whenever id say hey or hi ____, he'd try to act cool and say hey ___ whatsup? but stutter. it was the cutest thing. then he'd blush. it was too cute. I liked him and I'm pretty sure he liked me but he never asked me out, and I didn't ask him out because I've never done it before and I get shy too lol. anyways, its OK. for girls its cute when a guys shy. I hope the same is true for guys lol.

best of luck, oh and she doesn't hate you, its probably endearing

[mlink824]

You get awkward cause you thinkshes cute ! if she feels the same, shell handle your awkwardness till a certain point, but soon enough you got to man up and take control.. just bbe yourself and act like you have known her forever.. find things that you both enjoy to do and it will help you start conversation with her and help you remember good stories to share with her.

[Anonymous]

I'm sure she doesn't hate you. I personally have the same problem, too. As someone already mentioned, you're probably making things out to be worse than they are in your mind. Unless you did something extremely silly, I doubt she noticed much or even cared. If you feel like you talk too much, then next time you see her smile and let her do all the talking. (:

[fowlmen]

Guys talk because they want attention (studies proven). You obviously want her attention. It's only natural. My advice is that if she likes you, it wouldn't matter that you talk too much- just make sure it's interesting talk, not boring talk...

[rallz93]

Things just don't happen like that , you have to work to change your ways ...do something nice for her ;)

Girls always apreciate when boys do nice things for them ,especially if you act like a 5 year old..:)

[brunettebelle]

Lots of people have this problem. I never know what my facial expression is so, I don't know what body language I am giving out. I freak out too. I started to smile more and I got smiles from all types of guys.

[Laurie182]

i think its cute when a guy gets nervous. Lots of people do the same thing at least you can talk to her I'm too shy to even talk to the guy I like lol

[NessielaKee]

Ditto.

[kaleidy]

You're probably afraid that you'll do or say something stupid. Tons of people get like that. You get nervous because you don't want to come off embarrassing, but you come off embarrassed because you're nervous. It's a vicious circle. Try to pretend you know something embarrassing about her that nobody else knows. Or just pretend she's your best friend. That's helped for some of my friends.

[CaliforniaGurrl]

It doesn't really matter if you act all cool and stuf its fine if yu mess up. I personally think its really cutee:) thts how I can tell if a guy likes me or not(: you'll be fine:)

[Anonymous]

aw..

if she likes you, she'll just think its cute. if she doesn't like you, well, you just annoy her.

[mahalic007]

nope if the girl likes another guy no point in trying to make her like you girls are dumb like that

[Anonymous]

because you're nervous. think of her as just a friend and you'll be fine

[stormbreaker06]

I do the same I feel so dumb and childish

[TheCheshireCat]

Because you're human