Do you feel that incels are really unable to find a romantic partner or are they too picky?

[Anonymous]

I know plenty women who are single looking for just a nice guy, so for me personally, I feel that being incels is just a man being overly picky. ( Bare in mind that most incels are white men who are regarded as the most sought after men) 🙄 so when I hear a guy complain that they can't find someone I feel like slapping them, especially if he's white because most women of any race would like a white man.

They're to picky

They really can't find anyone

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Updates

+1 y

3 million black women are single in America. How come incels can't seek out black women? Exactly incels are to damn picky.

Updates

+1 y

I don't feel sorry for incels at all. They come across as privileged and entitled.

[razelove]

I think it's none of the above. Also because it's the wrong too. I'm picky about who I date, yet I still find women to date. My standards are high, and I am an odd duck. Many women had a time when they were fine wine, but that time has passed. Now they need a good personality because those looks aren't making up for flaws like wanting a 75/person first date. They either refuse to rise to the plate, can't, or lower THEIR standards. This is especially true of the age range you are in right now, the 20's are fresh in the memory, but it's feeling like time to settle down, get a good man and make some babies. Only issue is most of them settled down in their 20's and already have babies. Well, don't want a guy who has kids already. And/or they're divorced, nope, too many complications. So your pool remaining is guys who have little to no experience in long term relationships, and your expectation is a relationship.

Sorry for the rant, it just bothers be that you would want to physically assault someone for being white, single, and not lowering their standards because you won't either.

[Boppy]

From what I can tell, incels are people who were unable to find a romantic partner. It may have been due to their pickiness or being bullied a lot or something else. They were lonely and loveless for a while and then were lectured about how no matter what they thought, their loneliness was caused by being born wrong, and nothing could ever fix it.

I don't think they're picky, just lonely and hopeless and insecure. They reek of it. I've been there for non-incel reasons. It leads to a lot more rejection than usual as well as an unwillingness to believe a date cares back because nobody could ever love them. I picked B.

Honestly, I think that therapy and finding someone to care about them (friends, family) and have a social group to feel like they belong in are the best ways for them to heal. Then loving someone can be possible again. Ya dig it?

[Anonymous]

I see both sides. I’m very picky, I was all told by my friends that my standards were “too high.” But I’ve been with my girlfriend for over a year and a half now, so I don’t think they were too high, I just hadn’t found the right person. I also was casually dating before we met, so I wasn’t an incel, because I was still getting laid lol.

I think what you have is a demographic that was raised/ taught “if you’re nice to a woman and you do sweet things for her, she’ll love you forever.” And that’s simply not true. Now, who’s at fault for that, that’s another topic. However, these men are frustrated when they date a woman and find out that’s NOT all that women want. Is part of it that they’re going after the wrong women? Most likely. But I think women also have very high standards for today’s men.

As for the bit about black women, I don’t know of any black women that pursue white men openly or exclusively.

[Therisinghero12]

Other, I think it's hard for everyone to find a special someone just cause how the world is, I can kinda understand why someone would feel like no one want's them, but at the same time I really don't approve of giving up on it, because if you don't even try then how can you know for sure ya know?
Also about the picky thing there's a really funny song on it, ill see if I can link it real quick:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0l5nIx0Acw

[Gatman34]

No single women don’t even acknowledge men like incels in the dating world. it’s hypergamy you know the 80/20 rule. women only go over the top 20% of men. Women don’t even notice 80% of men in the world. That’s just reality. Those men literally can’t find people and that’s how it’s always been. It’s just now with social media they can vent their frustrations for the world to see

[Cyrus03]

You think white men are the most sought after? Blacked. com and majority of white women would bed to differ.

[Asker]

Ok Cupid says you guys are, plus u don't see many Asian women looking for blackmen only white girls.

[Cyrus03]

There is a big difference between online dating/hookups and normal hookups. White men are more likely to use online platforms, while black men are more likely to use more traditional methods.

Also, I have known plenty of Asians looking for black guys.

[HelpImDying]

Only if it's a female incel. You can't look at things from a women's point of view. Most guys don't have options. Some guys can create a tinder and not get a single match. Also this question is so fucking loaded

[Asker]

Answer my other question... how come incels can't seek out the 3 million single black women?

[HelpImDying]

I'm not an incel but being a black guy (well, half) that lost interest in black women, a lot of y'all simply just have bad personalities. Ik that sounds rough but unfortunately it's the truth. No one wants to date someone who's arrogant and hot headed as a way to cope with being wildly insecure. That stigma ends up being projected to all black women and tbh rightfully so. I used to date black girls but it got so frustrating that I gave up. I want someone that makes me happy not someone who seems to get enjoyment out of pissing me off. So that's my guess as to why people don't date black women. To put it simply, there are less stressful options

[Asker]

So they're picky plus you just said most guys don't have options.

[Asker]

So being an incel is a guy being to picky because he could have chosen a black woman.

[HelpImDying]

I said I'm not an incel, the reason someone's an incel is because they can't get laid. The term literally stands for INVOLUNTARY celibate, so unless you're implying black women would fuck anything that comes their way, these guys are getting rejected by them too.

[Asker]

So are black women incels?

[HelpImDying]

Anyone can be an incel. Being a black female doesn't automatically make you an incel. Plus most black girls don't have trouble getting laid, they just have trouble finding a relationship

[loveslongnails]

I'm answering this question with an "I don't give a shit", not because I'm trying to be rude, but because it's a legitimate response. I truly don't give a shit why incels choose to be intentionally celibate. Does anybody really care about that?

[MoscowMitch]

Technically incels don't choose to be celibate. Incel = Involuntarily Celibate.

[loveslongnails]

@MoscowMitch That's a discussion waiting to happen, but I don't believe for one minute that it's actually involuntary. I believe the "in" in incel is for "intentionally". For definitions sake, I punched this in and got the following: "a member of an online community of young men who consider themselves unable to attract women sexually, typically associated with views that are hostile toward women and men who are sexually active."
Do you agree with that?

[MoscowMitch]

I think that's a very narrow definition. Incels existed before the online community did. Originally the term was a neutral one meaning someone who wasn't getting any, but not abstaining for religious or personal reasons.

[loveslongnails]

@MoscowMitch I can live with that definition too, but I would still maintain that "not gettin' any" was a wholly involuntary situation. I mean heck... there are girls who think they're rejects too, as well as guys. Why wouldn't they find one another? I'm saying it's possible :)

[MoscowMitch]

I hear ya.

[Shamalien]

well if they are being picky then they aren't an incel, they are a volcel

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Incels have mental illnesses; the rampage of shootings prove they are crazy.

[HelpImDying]

The overwhelming majority of shootings aren't for that reason but ok boomer

[MoscowMitch]

Being single can adversely affect your mental health, so it's a self-fulfilling prophecy.

[MoscowMitch]

They're just bad at relationships. They struggle to approach women or speak to them, and don't have what it takes to maintain a relationship when they do.

[Missourifried]

I'd think involuntary celibacy or at least percieved involuntary celibacy could be damaging long term. Maybe as simple as to much cock blocking going on

[lofii]

If she breathes, she's fuckable to me

[Fuentes]

I think your an incel