Is it "rude" not to congratulate someone who is having a baby? (Page 2)
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It's one of those things called "courtesy" because the presumption is she wanted to get pregnant and she's pleased about it. It's one of those things where she won't remember everybody who congratulates her, but might remember anyone who didn't! LOL. PS> If you can't bring yourself to utter the single word "congratulations", you could be a funny guy and say "cool, do we know who the mother is?"
It’s only one of the most major accomplishments in their life, of course you should say congratulations.
... No it isn't. Things that require effort are "major accomplishments." Laying on one's back and spreading one's legs and getting creampied by a male is not a "major accomplishment," dude.
Dude how about the 9 months of pregnancy after intercourse. You missed acknowledgement of that effort.
Not to mention the actual delivery and days recovering and sleepless nights for the next year
... what about it.
And anyway, so you're suggesting that when someone says "congratulations" to hearing "I'm pregnant," they're congratulating the female for future actions that she hasn't taken yet?
Yes it’s all included. Having a baby is a major achievement in most people’s life, one of the goals that rank highest. If you don’t acknowledge how important a new child is to someone’s life then what are some major goals that you would like to accomplish that rank higher?
... Again, there is no underlying logic to dubbing it an "achievement." Climbing a mountain is an achievement. Proving that you're the best person for a difficult job and getting hired for it is an achievement. Breathing is not an achievement. Do you know why breathing is not an achievement?
Breathing isn’t an achievement because we all breathe every day. But for many people giving birth is way above getting hired or mountain climbing.
I guess it comes down to priorities. For me personally family is near the top of my priority list. I would much rather celebrate a new member of the family then climb a mountain. You just have a different set of priorities.
Let’s agree to disagree.
Breathing isn't an achievement because everyone does it. It requires no effort, short of the small minority of people who may have a physical disability of some kind. Achievements, whatever they are, are achievements because they require effort.
Finding sex with a male is incredibly, incredibly easy for females. It does not require effort. Finding it with *Prince Charming* may require effort, sure, but simply getting it is not difficult and requires little-to-no effort for females, due to how much more males want it. Therefore, logically, since it does not require effort, it is not an achievement. Perhaps you would say that pregnancy and childbirth require effort-- sure, they do, but they are still the result of the sex, and sex does not require effort. Besides, a thing being *hard* is not the same as having something be an *effort.* An effort is something that you *go out of your way to do that cannot and does not simply happen to you.* The birth and pregnancy are unavoidable parts of the whole process-- they aren't going out of their way for it to happen-- and again, the inception requires no effort.
There is no logical or rational reason to congratulate a female for being pregnant or birthing a child.
@Thatsamazing If a woman is pregnant AND she actually wants a baby, then there IS reason to congratulate her—the reason is, to show that you are (or at least appear to be) happy for her that she got something she wanted—she wanted a kid, now she has one. 👍 So “congrats” to her for now having that.
P. S. Obviously I don’t know how old YOUR mom was when she was pregnant with u—but if she WANTED to have a baby, then maybe people congratulated her because out of happiness for her that she was gonna have u.
🤣 I mean he does have a point you guys. Unless she's been struggling to have children, it's not that big of a deal.
Personally I don't congratulate anyone for getting knocked up either. I just keep my mouth shut.
what about if it's a family member.
🤣🤣🤣 I laughed so hard at this. You don't have to congratulate anyone if you don't want to. I don't know why that's a nicety anyway. The people that know and care about her will congratulate her (for the baby, not for having sex).
... The baby is a result of nothing more than sex. That's the point.
... Like I said, I don't know why people consider congratulating for something like that, unless they know her personally.
Because people are idiots and we've been taught, and have taught ourselves and each other, that hearing "I'm pregnant" should elicit a response of "congratulations," even if there isn't a whiff of actual logic or reason behind saying that.
It's about more than just the pregnancy I think. If they're excited about it, it usually means they planned for it and did everything they needed to do in order to get ready for the responsibility, which is a pretty big accomplishment. They might see it as being similar to not saying congratulations for them getting a promotion
Extending a family is an exciting thing, in many cases. But yes, it's not something that warrants a "Congratulations".
I think you and I are on the same page here, though I would offer excitement and congratulations to someone who I know very well and care about, regardless of logic.
@TheBreakfastGuy... It's still a result of having sex. "Planned" sex versus unplanned sex means nothing. It's a physical act. Planning it changes nothing.
@Thatsamazing If it was only about the pregnancy, you're absolutely correct. What I'm saying is that they could be indirectly talking about the circumstances surrounding the pregnancy as well.
In any case, no one is entitled to anything from anyone else, so getting mad about not being congratulated is uncalled for, but I think I can understand why they'd feel that way, especially if you're close with them
@TheBreakfastGuy Great, except they usually aren't referring to the circumstances around it, and regardless, it's what people say anyway. But they shouldn't.
It’s not just about having sex. Some people actually plan pregnancies. They congrats is for them becoming a parent, by the way. Having sex is easy. Being a parent is not, so if you willingly chose to be a parent and are dedicated to it, then yeah. That’s what the congrats is for.
I say congrats but only to people I know. Like family. My cousin tried to have a baby with her husband for 11 years. 11 YEARS. It’s not just having sex. I remember she was getting hormones injected into her, doing some other stuff to her eggs, etc. I saw it take a toll on her physically just because she wanted to be a mom. It took her 11 years to have a kid. I def congratulated her.
@Angie221994 ... Yes... a significant minority of females have trouble conceiving. Which means literally nothing in terms of what we're talking about, which is that babies are a result of sex. And as you said, "having sex is easy." But what you really meant was, GETTING sex is easy, particularly for females.
What does getting sex have anything to do with parenting?
And also, 30% of women have fertility issues. 47% have complications in their pregnancy. And 1 in 22 women in the U. S die in labor. That’s not a minority.
@Angie221994 I... wow. Okay. I think you need to go to dictionary. com to look up what the word "minority" means. And... you clearly are not getting it-- the parenting *exists* because of sex. Not to mention that when a chick says "I'm pregnant," and you say "congratulations," you're essentially saying that the reason you're saying that is because of things in the future that she hasn't done yet? That's stupid.
Yup.
@Angie221994 ... That's stupid.
I don’t think it’s a big deal if you don’t congratulate her. Having a baby is definitely exciting news, but if you’re not that close to her it’s not important to you.
I think it's personal choice. You're not congratulating the act of conception, you're congratulating the fortune of getting pregnant which is far from guaranteed.
I believe there is a relativity to this question. Example: Is this your 1st child with your new husband? I would say a congrats is in order. However, is this your 4th child with your 4th Babydaddy? See my point?
I don’t think it’s rude in any way but she’s doing a lot more than just having sex... she’s creating a whole person..
true
That's what the body is designed to do though lol it's like congratulating someone for pooping if you eat it's going to happen
R1ngzz, I didn’t realize you could create another life? I thought only women could?
Also, pooping isn’t the same as having a baby. Pooping takes a couple hours to go through the digestive process. Pregnancy takes 9 months, and actually comes with side effects. You wouldn’t know because you’re not capable of doing it. But pregnant women are actually at risk or dying from labor itself. And let’s not get started on complications, or the risk of a c-section. You know, getting cut open? And they take your guts out of your body. I didn’t realize that’s the same as pooping. Wow.
But yeah. You’re right. Your body is designed to get its guts taken out of you. My bad.
Angieeee what's up good morning. Never said I could have babies.. Also womens body is designed for reproduction. Plain and simple
Not patting someone on the back for their body doing what it's supposed to do
Not all women’s bodies are designed for reproduction. That’s why some women struggle to have babies.
by the way, you congratulate someone because they’re going to be a parent. Sex is easy, parenting is not. Oh and by the way, just because a woman can have a baby, doesn’t mean it’s easy. And it’s definitely not as easy as pooping. I don't know where you got that idea from.
Haha dude that is funny topic. I think it is socialy expected that you formulate some kind of "satisfaction" or "congratulation" for her. it is not understood if you don't express some hapiness. but this botheers me so much as you haha
its called EMPATHY. it doesn't matter if you care or not its like, if your grandma gives you a itchy sweater.
you dont say: this seater sucks granny. you say thank you, because good manners cost nothing.
Big deal she will have another bastard, to leech on welfare, big deal.
All world own her nothing for doing it...
In the end she does not know how to do it, so ended up pregnant... Obviously now she will say she wanted it from begining...
Why not !! Why would it hurt to just sayin congratulations?
I think it's rude to say "we're having a baby" when the guy's role lasts for one night tops. Congratulate them but as the guy, I'd feel like I'm taking credit for her work if I'm congratulated too much 🤷🏽♂️
Nah i actually don't congratulate unless I'm 501% sure she's pregnant, but even if u know it's not a law so at the end of the day it's your choice. If it makes u feel uncomfortable then don't congratulate them. It's fine
My boss recently had a baby and posted the photos of the certificate all over the group chat.
I really wanted to just not answer it but ended up begrudgingly responding with my insincere congratulations.
If it was acceptable to write that I don't give a shit and would prefer he kept his personal life to himself, that's what I would have written.
She is going to carry a baby 9 months long. Going trough a pregnancy is not an easy thing and you are not going to die if you congratulate her. Dont your parents teach you basic manners? I am literally shocked how you are acting at that age.
lmao 😂😂😂lol fr 😂😂😂
You can not do it if you don't like. I only do it because I don't know what else to say tbh.😂😂😂
It can be, but if you don't want to, it shouldn't be a big deal. Not everyone wants to have kids, or like you said, congratulate someone for having unprotected sex and getting knocked up.
It IS rude! Make sure to pat the father's balls, too. I'm kidding, I mostly don't really care about babies, but if it's someone close, it's appropriate to congratulate them, if you can't do that, then don't do anything.
Ok. I would congratulate her for having sex but... a baby? Nope