My husband never plans anything for us and it makes me feel unloved?

[Anonymous]

I am so tired of my husband. He hasn’t had a job for more than 6 months for more than 3 years. He is unemployed and all he does is basket, fitness and hanging with his friend. We have kids. I am a student but currently has holiday. He goes maybe 13 or 14 comes home 8, 9, 10 pm. I try to plan things for us, he never. Only thing he does is planning basket, fitness or doing nothing with his only friend. I feel like he doesn’t love me and then when he is finally home with me all he does is falling asleep.

Updates

+1 y

Today i was like can't you take the kids with you When you go visit your friend because i wanted to go to dance class (i often have the kids when i see friends) he really didn’t wanted that. Then he said ok can take them and change the program with his friend for tomorrow. Then he said ok can take them to see his friend today. But then i texted saying it is ok no need because i could hear he just felt pity

Updates

+1 y

Basket meant basketball

[KrakenAttackin]

Are you the kind of female who rejects everything that is planned? "Hey honey, how about we do to a nice dinner at XYZ"? you, "noooooo... I don't want to do that". OK, how about we take a drive to the park and take a walk"? you, nooo... I don't want to get sweaty". OK, how about we go and see a movie"... "Nooooo... the theatres are so cold". "OK, how about we take a nice drive"? You "nooo..."

And on, and on, and on... men get REALLY tired of this shit.

Think before you reply.

[Asker]

No of course not

[mmv99]

Is he suffering from some sort of depression or is he just a huge looser?

Also, don't be such a pushover. A relationship should normally be 50/50 effort unless something else is agreed upon.

[Asker]

I highly doubt he is depressed

[mmv99]

If he does not have the common signs of depression then you need to put your foot down or divorce him... But remember that communication is key. If you really communicated your feelings (not "he should know") and there is no change then I think you should cut you losses.

Not to be mean but a man that does not work to provide for his family and does not take care of his kids sounds pretty bad.

[MrHopper]

Have you tried discussing it with him? he might not be aware and be too focused on his other things to realise what he is loosing?

[MannMitAntworten]

Are you not equally taking pity by taking the kids too? NO! Let him have his kids too... He gets his time, now have your time. You two are rushing towards a burnout.

[abcboy123]

You should defitinitely talk with him about it. And when it won't be better after that or he won't at least try, dont be afraid of leaving him

[EmmaMary]

Just what the hell is "basket"?

[Asker]

Basketball

[Anonymous]

My guess is you and him became parents quite young

[Asker]

I did, he is 17 years older than mr so he didn't

[Opinion Owner]

Oh I see

[WhereAmI]

What's basket? 🤨

[Asker]

A 5-10 minute walk for home, i know it is true he is there

[Asker]

Basketball i meanrt

[WhereAmI]

I can understand the need to exercise, but picking his friend over you isn't cool. He sounds like he's ignoring you if he doesn't come home till late.

[Asker]

All i get is him falling asleep to netflix