Would a guy respect the girl he cheated with if she kept it all a secret because she didn’t want to ruin his life?

[Anonymous]

Just found out that my ex has been cheating on his current girlfriend with me for 10 months.

When I found out he was still with her I ended things and said it was either me or her and he ended up blocking me on everything except Facebook.

He’s now constantly posting lots of photos of them together - knowing fine well I can see them.

I could easily tell her the truth but I decided not to as they’ve just bought a house together and I don’t want to mess that up.

I feel absolutely awful but I don’t want to ruin anyone’s life.

Will he respect me for not saying anything and respect me for not ruining his life?

Basically I’m hoping he will realise I’m actually a decent person and that he will feel guilty for being a dick to me.

I feel horrible and heartbroken at the same time.

[BigSis]

This is not Orthodox advice, but I'd make sure he's not smearing you before you decide to not cause trouble. If he is, you might want to smear him on your social media. That will send a message to stay back. If you're actually afraid that he's going to ruin your life, I'd tell people openly and let them know what's going on.

Usually men don't do this unless there is something seriously wrong with them. He had no interest in opening that up with you. He's probably more afraid of you than you are of him, since he wronged you.

[c0vidsux]

If he doesn't, I as well as a majority of others would respect you. That's a very considerate, mature, and in my opinion a selfless thing to do for a person. You basically have the capability of foiling all his lies and turning his life upside down, but you're choosing the "higher road". You are showing a maturity and kind heartedness that he obviously doesn't have, and you should be proud for having that kind of thoughtfulness in you. Someone like you will find a way better guy 👍♥️

[Asker]

Aww thank you. You have made me feel a lot better about this horrible situation. Thanks! ☺️

[ColHathi]

That's true, but if he had no qualms cheating on the woman that he just bought a house with for 10 months, then in my opinion the good thing would be to warn that woman of just what type of person he is. Otherwise it's only a matter of time before she discovers it herself, and it's gonna hit her even harder than it otherwise would've. What if they have children when that happens?

[Asker]

@ColHathi Yeah I totally agree with you. I’ve thought about telling her, however, I just couldn’t do that to someone and it makes me feel sick thinking about it.

If I did it could potentially ruin both of their lives so I’d rather be the only one hurt in this situation and just disappear and let them be happy as I don’t want to hurt either of them.

He has also moved away from his hometown, left his job, left his friends and family to live with her in another town too.

I guess if he’s unhappy he will end it in time and hopefully she’ll find someone better.

[spartan55]

He will never respect you. He is just glad you aren't spilling the beans. Think about it, you are seeking validation and respect from a piece of shit cheater...

[Asker]

I guess I’m just hoping he’ll regret losing me. Thanks.

[spartan55]

Guys like that are incapable of those feelings.

[ColHathi]

I would respect her, but I'd respect her decision regardless, as should he, if he isn't a complete piece of shit.

The woman that he just bought a house with should be warned of what type of guy he is, in my opinion.

[jimmy2]

Not sure can't find women like that