Why is my guy friend acting this way:(?

[Anonymous]

I’ve always had a soft spot for my guy friend. I’ve known him for 6 years but never made a move because the feelings weren’t strong enough and I enjoyed the friendship. I’ve had a boyfriend for 2 years now. The relationship is not great and I’m unhappy, naturally I started to confide in my guy friend and starting developing stronger feelings for him. I thought it was grim to feel this way and have a boyfriend. It got too much, I decided to tell my guy friend about my feelings and said we should stop talking for a few months so I can get over it. I did make it clear that I’d be back and that I wanted to stay friends because I didn’t want to waste the 6 years. He said dating me is not something he wants or ever will. He removed me from social media.

We didn’t talk for a few months. I reached out recently and we both agreed we’d be friends again but he said it’ll ‘take time’. Obviously it’s not the same. He never initiates contact but always responds to me. He’s up for meeting in summer but it’s always me making the plans. I’ve made it clear I want to be friends again, like old times. I don’t understand why he wouldn’t want to be friends again and forget about what happened, he said he didn’t want to date me, so if the attraction isn’t there then what is the problem? Why wouldn’t he just not reply or block my number? I really am over the feelings. The friendship is way more important to me. On the phone the other day he says ‘We’re not friends’ but continues to treat and talk to me like a friend. Why answer the phone? Why say you wanna work towards being friends again? What is the point of all this? I said ‘So why am I ringing you?’ And he said ‘You tell me’. I’m still removed from social media. I would understand if he was like ‘I just don’t want to be your friend period, leave me alone’ but he hasn’t said anything straight up like that. What do I do? What should I say to him? Men please answer and help, thanks. I genuinely really care about this person :(

[PhantomMk]

Ok it looks like it’s probably that time to cut somebody out of your life. I can understand why he would want to stop being friends when you admitted you wanted to date him not saying there is anything wrong with you, however dating long time friends can ruin the friendship for most people and he was probably feeling that way. Nonetheless you made it clear that that those emotions are gone and you’d like to just remain friends. Seeing this he should have known and made an attempt to keep the relationship going as it seems as though you two have been friends for quite a while. At this point it appears as though he has changed for the worst and won’t be willing to make any attempt to repair the friendship. You can keep trying but it looks like he is avoiding you. He hasn’t deleted your number so he must want the friendship to be there still even if it’s just for a little bit. I’d advise to let this tension die down a little bit not for a few months but maybe a week or two and get to the bottom line of A.) Why he is avoiding you. B.) Does he still want the friendship to work and C.) Make your wants known. Ex: If you want this friendship to continue you need to understand those feelings before don’t exist anymore and I just to want to remain friends, if you don’t that’s cool but don’t keep leading me on as if I’m just some project that you come back to when you want me. Just make sure you are firm in those demands and questions. But most likely you might have to cut him out.

[Gosceewual]

I don't know but if i was him, the only reason id do this is if i initially wanted you first... fancied you... and u rejected me and hurt me... then all of a sudden months later oh u want me now? na fuck that. ... what goes around comes around

[Iron_Man]

Not to try to hurt your feelings but you're the perfect example on why I don't want my girlfriend having guy friends

[Avicenna]

He seems hurt or upset

[Anonymous]

He likes you