Im a 21 year old girl! So, I’m out with my boyfriend (27) and I notice on his YouTube and Instagram account that he has quite a few video and posts with girls twerking and just showing more skin than I’m comfortable with. It’s not like he’s hiding the fact he looks at the videos from me. I don't know if he saves them because I don’t go through his phone nor do I want to. I ask him why you have so many posts with girls doing all that. He tells me he just looks to see what stupid dance they come up with next and that doesn’t really watch them, he just he likes to read the comments! I ask him if they so stupid why bother watch it? He also said that they just pop up so nothing he can do about it but then I said YouTube and Instagram only give you videos based on what you’ve watched in the past. It’s the algorithm! He also sends some to his friend to get his reaction. I told him I didn’t like it once with first time calmly and he just says he just likes to read the comments, “honestly”, he says! The second time I got upset and he brushed it off like my feelings weren’t valid and that “I don’t have anything to worry about because he’s not gonna get anything from them”. After that I didn’t talk to him for the whole afternoon. I’m more upset now because I told him my displeasure but just plays it off as nothing. Now I’m concerned that if I tell him I don’t like something that’s more serious than this, will he play off as nothing either. Are my feelings valid or am I overreacting!
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Your feelings are always valid. But that doesn't mean you aren't over reacting.
He should be honest and say he likes the videos. Almost all guys watch porn. Almost no guys like to comment on dancing.
If I were you, I'd rather he watch tiktoks than message other women. One one hand, he should be honest with you and say he likes the videos. But on the other hand, I kind of don't blame him for trying to play it off.
My sister found my porn once. She came up and asked me about it. I said it was a virus, that bookmarkd a bunch of porn in a hidden bookmark folder. She obviously didn't believe me. It obviously wasn't true... But it's like, I wouldn't lie if you weren't going to flip out on me for being normal.
Years later, I saw my sister watching porn. I had the decency to not say anything and pretend I didn't.
That's honestly the right reaction.
The actual pope liked a semi provocative Instagram photo of a hot girl in a bikini, people lost their minds, and his response was basically "All people are beautiful, love everyone, God bless"
And I was just like, good answer.
I don't think it's something you should be concerned about.