People say girls like guys who treat them bad, thoughts?

Question

Avicenna · Accepted Answer

Some do, but they are very much the minority. It's not normal and definitely not healthy to want to be treated badly or to accept it.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Accepted Answer

A tiny group of girls does

MrOracle · Answer

Not only is this true, but it's far more common than most women realize. That's because it's not always as overt. Here's an example of what most women think when asked this question:

https://www.youtube.com/embed/Eo9PLInjjLc

(Start at 01:58)

But what most women do isn't nearly that blatant, yet they're still doing more-or-less the same thing.

Nearly all women today ONLY consider men in the top 20% to date - and for the majority of those women, it's really only men in the top 10%. Women don't actually REALIZE that they're doing this - they don't realize that their first 2 criteria alone (on their often 20+ item list of requirements for men) have already eliminated over 90% of men - but they do this routinely. Yes, if a woman is a 9 herself, then she can reasonably expect to get a guy who is a 9 or 10, but if a woman is a 6 - much less a 4 - then she is delusional in believing that she has any chance of a RELATIONSHIP with a man who is a 9 or a 10.

The problem is that she can get ATTENTION from those 9s and 10s - as long as she's willing to trade her sexuality for it. And most women are willing to make that trade, because they believe (even if they know better) that if he fucks her, that he'd consider committing to her, or, that she can CHANGE HIM and make him love her. Yet, in the entire history of the human species, there are only a handful of examples of this actually happening - the VAST majority of the time, the women ends up getting used and hurt. BUT... THEN she can blame ALL men for this, so, there's that.

The crazy thing is that a woman who is herself a 6 - even by her own admission - is absolutely HORRIFIED by the idea that she'd have to "settle" for a man who is a 6, or even a 7. Most have no idea that the only men they even look at are very rare 9s and 10s, and that the vast majority of people aren't even close to that class. Still, they feel entitled to those men, or at least, as close as they can get. So they pursue 9s and 10s exclusively, and those men have SO MANY OPTIONS with women that they have zero need to take any woman seriously or to commit to any of them. To a 9 or 10 guy, women are easily and quickly replaceable. If you refuse him or you are a hassle for him, he can have another girl over in under 30 minutes who is more than happy to do as he asked. And, yeah, some girls WILL date a guy who is "only" an 8.5, and may not have THAT many options, but he still gets plenty of interest from other girls. When she's only a 5 or 6, and he's an 8.5, he's still going to do what he wants and treat you as he pleases, and it's rarely going to go well for you.

But most women would much prefer to keep doing that, over and over and over, rather than "settle" for a man on (or even close to) her own level. The pull of Instagram is just too strong, and she's DYING to be one of those women being "flown out" and vacationing in Greece or cruising the Med on a big yacht. They never ask themselves: do I even KNOW any woman who has managed a RELATIONSHIP with such men? Sure, she might have traded casual sex (or more) for a weekend in Dubai, but I'm talking a sustained relationship? It almost never happens.

But, heaven forbid that she has to date a guy who lives a similar lifestyle and is at the same social level as she is - that's just unthinkable for most women, even though most won't admit it.

BlueScorpio · Answer

No. Most women want to be treated well, some women may end up falling for bad guy cause he either changed over time and started showing his true colors or they didn't recognize the warning signs right away. Some women aren't in good head space, hanging out with the wrong crowd and end up with guy who also don't have his head on his shoulders either.

For the most part, this whole "women only want bad boys" stuff you hear from men online come out of anger and hurt because the women they wanted rejected them. For some of them it's impossible for them to believe they having glaring flaws or just aren't every woman's cup of tea. It can't be them, if she doesn't want him it MUST be because she wants an asshole with 5 felonies who don't see his kids, don't have a job, and occasionally treats her lije punching bag. Not saying it doesn't happen but most women do want to avoid such relationships and men.

But for a lot guys it's a defense mechanism for their egos to soften the blow. They just need to understand that particular woman isn't for them but they will eventually find the right woman who is.

Anonymous · Answer

Women are attracted to challenge.

Men are caught up and brainwashed in this double whammy pickle where 1) many of us were taught old school “chivalry” 2) we are getting demonized by feminism so it gives us toxic shame/guilt and makes us second guess our words/actions around women.

So it’s no surprise that women are in general being treated a lot better than men are in dating situations. Men are taught to kiss their asses. Then when an asshole comes along he stands out because he treats the woman differently than she is used to. She thinks she can “change” him (he won’t change).

At the end the day it’s not that women who love assholes that I have a problem with. Sure it’s ass backwards and f*cking self destructive but a cat will be a cat.

No what I have a problem with is how many women can’t take self responsibility for their stupid dating decisions. It’s not a matter of if but when the asshole will ultimately burn her for good (cheating, emotional/physical abuse, financial theft, etc.) The writing was on wall that would happen but she still dove head first into the dark pit. Yet she screams and cries “victim” to the world and blamed all men for her dumb decision. Some of these women go from bad to worse and join man hating modern feminist groups.

I truly believe that at least 50% of man on woman domestic violence and abuse could be prevented if it wasn’t for women chasing these assholes to begin with.

Anonymous · Answer

You know it’s tough to analyze the statistics because we truly don’t know. But I think in western countries how the media plays a role, influence on social media as well, movies, magazines. Girls in western countries tend to be more immature of being with a guy who treats them bad. I hear it and read it all the time that they don’t want a proper guy. But I don’t want to generalize entirely based on western countries vs eastern countries. Part of the reason is upbringing, I truly believe any girl who has a lack of love in the house, if her father is absent. She will most likely seek “love” through other ways and yes that means sometimes being with a shitty person.

If a girl who then becomes a young woman has hate for her father and bad experiences with guys she’s dated then it can be an avalanche/downfall on her emotions. She will lack trust in men. So I hope for any girl reading this, I hope you’re not with a guy who dismisses your feelings and emotions or treats you poorly. I understand, in a relationship it’s not just one side where let’s say the girl gets showered with praise, admiration and she doesn’t care about the guy. It should go both ways equally, that’s a healthy relationship.

river23 · Answer

I love it when a guy takes charge especially in the bedroom, but if he says mean things or acts aggressively possessive and bossy I'll kick his ass and put him in his place because even if I loved him I will not let a man control what I do or don't do nor treat me like shit or put me down. If a man were to treat me any less than I am, I'll walk out and if I love him I'll talk to him and let him explain himself but if he treats me any less than I deserve I will find better. It's just the truth guys.

7Phoenix7 · Answer

There are women with a good father figure, and there are women with a bad father figure, or no father at all. The women with a father who was abusive in any way towards her or her mother are more likely to be attracted to that type of man subconsciously. The woman that grew up without a father goes searching for one subconsciously through her love life and often gets stuck with an abuser... or "bad guy".

stratford · Answer

I'm sure if you ask any girl whether she likes a 'bad guy' - a guy that treats her mean, or is controlling, or cheats, they will all say no.

However, I have know quite a few girls who have been in a relationship with a complete jerk, but are somehow blind to it. Lots of guys are the same. So I think the word 'like' might be a bit confusing.

I would love someone to explain why people are like this, as I get so frustrated by people who can't see how toxic and damaging a guy or girl is for them.

I've also found that people who are in a toxic relationship aren't the type of people I want to hang out with anyway.

DermalPunch · Answer

Women latch on to people with far more bad qualities than good because they have idealized the person or they don't have enough patience and fortitude of character to be willing to walk away from a relationship that they crave for theor own well-being.

Sarahplus2 · Answer

Some girls date the same type of idiot all the time. They get shit on and when they find someone new it's the same type of idiot again. Some will ruin a good relationship because they will self sabotage it cause they are used to relationships that have turmoil. This goes for some men too.

Rockstarrrrr · Answer

From my experience... It seems like the hotter the girl.. The more likely she likes being treated badly... I don't know why.. Maybe because they're used to the opposite all the time... And the girls who were into me the most are the ones I gave the less attention or even already rejected... These types of girls are actually very common... That's why It's a little hard for me to find someone I really like... It's probably one of the reasons I like older girls.. They're less likely to be like that

PamelaRivers · Answer

I don't, won't put up with an abusive guy. I have an aunt that even a psychologist said (based on an exam and questioning her) that she wouldn't know how to act in a "normal / healthy relationship". She gravitates to abusive ones.

20thGreatRomances · Answer

Even with my recent experience, I am going to go with a tiny group of girls do. I was unlucky to go on a date with a girl from these tiny groups that don't feel so tiny sometimes.

I was recently ghosted and as we have all discussed on GaG many times, I wondered why. Well, it turns out my date ghosted me for some ahole guy. I had to confirm this on my own. And she has a history of getting treated badly. Good thing I found out about everything now than later!

MrsTurkleton · Answer

Nobody likes to be treated badly.
Some girls like drama, some like a challenge…. some grew up with an absent parent and haven’t been shown what being treated well by the opposite sex looks like…. but nobody really likes to be treated badly. No one likes being hurt.

Goth_cat · Answer

The thing is most men start as really good people , then when we get attached they show their true colour and we stick around hoping they go back to what they were in the beginning.

QuietVerbena · Answer

Generally disagree but some girls do like guys who treat them badly but then buy them jewelry and flowers after to make up for it

FilmGuy93 · Answer

I don't think girls like guys that treat them badly, but I do think that most girls really suck at identifying good men.

Blackcosmo · Answer

A small minority and they're not very normal.

Autember · Answer

Of course every girl wants to be treated like a princess, but we also crave validation. So when we come across a man who doesn't love us the way we deserve... well we hope that we can change his mind. I think that's why we get hung up on bad men.

BUTIMRIGHTTHO · Answer

you date what u are a fit for. Girls grow up in these broken families and cannot tell a bad guy when they see one. That's why none of them like bad guys... They dont know they are with one.

ethanallen · Answer

100% true. I used to be a nice guy. Now I never compliment a woman. In bed, I denigrate her with abusive language and tell her she is a fucking whore. It has helped me have more power in the relationship.

freewife · Answer

Mainly girls damaged by some shitty family dynamic accept that sort of behaviour. Sad.

Anonymous · Answer

That is BS that was obviously invented by a sad and bitter man somewhere.

Hairylegs222 · Answer

Some women I've known crave all the drama involved from verbal abuse. All the arguing, heated conversations, etc. Also talking to their friends about how awful the guy is complaining about him, drama talk. Sounds familiar right 😂?

2Wheels · Answer

I know some girls do, I'm just definitely not one of them.

Staximus · Answer

I've seen it again and again. Girls and women being attracted to guys that treat them like they don't matter or are only an option and not a priority

SwimmerMuscle2000 · Answer

Most women like a man to take charge but there’s a difference between being an Alpha male and a disrespectful piece of garbage. Most women I know wouldn’t stay with a man who treated them poorly.

mr4435669 · Answer

Women tend to be attracted to the Dark Triad: narcissism, manipulation, and psychopathy.

TroyDT · Answer

I think a lot of women, probably most, prefer guys who are not weak push-overs, so jerks are by default more appealing.

mandyfire98 · Answer

Hard disagree from me. You treat me bad, I walk.

Anonymous · Answer

Dumb. Most Women don't like weak, pushover, sissy men. That doesn't mean they want to be a with jerks who treat them badly. SOME girls go for jerks, and chances are she's a jerk herself.

convo_king89 · Answer

Don’t they love bad boys and to be submissive and be dominated.

Zolly99999 · Answer

A certain type of girls do.. but not all girls

FreyaRed · Answer

C There are clowns in any gender

dolemite89 · Answer

women don’t like to admit it but it’s usually true. The phrase nice guys finish last didn’t just come outta nowhere.

landingout2 · Answer

100% true girls like me when I treat them like sex objects women like evil cause they are evil

Idkwtfimdoing96 · Answer

well I don't like bad guys lmao

VaasMontenegro · Answer

It is true. Why the hell do you think there are so many single mothers out there?😂

MemeSupreme · Answer

many girls do and many girls don't

AsaKyo · Answer

I don't

Valso · Answer

That explains why I'm never liked, LOL

katestar · Answer

My thoughts are guys that are jerks.

LavLavLuv · Answer

disagree hehe

Anonymous · Answer

That is true to some extent.

People say girls like guys who treat them bad, thoughts?

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