I was 40 minutes late to our first date. He was very rude to me after that. Why? Just because I was late? Did I hurt his feelings?

[Anonymous]

He said hurtful things to me.

[Anonymous]

Its disrespectful of his time to be late. In my case i give 10 minutes, If you're more than 10 minutes late im gone. His rudeness was likely due to the fact that you disrespected his time. His rudeness is justified. Though he should have just left.

[Asker]

Do you think he was mean because he was hurt?

[Opinion Owner]

Hurt? No, disrespected? Yes.

[Asker]

So he would hurt my feelings because he felt disrespected?

[Opinion Owner]

Yes, it's stupid for him to act like that but yes

[Asker]

did he like me for him to get so hurt and be harsh?

[Asker]

? :)

[FilmGuy93]

Yeah. You demonstrated to him that you don't respect him enough to show up on time. He didn't handle things well, but my guess is that you probably also didn't apologize for being late or attempt to reschedule in any way.

[douride2]

I would never have waited 40 minutes for you to show up.

[Asker]

Do you think he was mean because he was hurt?

[douride2]

Most likely he was.

[Asker]

did he like me for him to get so hurt and be harsh?

[douride2]

That would be something only he can answer. I think the 2 of you should have a long talk.

[Anonymous]

Ya obviously you hurt his feelings by showing him you don't give a single flying fuck about him or his time

At least that's how he took it. I'm sure you had your reasons and I hope you let him know you were running late instead of thinking "Fuck him, if he wants me bad enough he can wait. I'm pretty hot shit after all"

[Asker]

So he decided to hurt me back?

[Asker]

He said to me : I don’t want to waste time, I’m looking for my soulmate and good wife…

[HSalenko]

It wasn't nice of him to be mean, but 40 minutes late is a very bad first impression.

[Asker]

Do you think he was mean because he was hurt?

[HSalenko]

Absolutely, a lot of guys wouldn't wait the 30 minutes, let alone 40.

[Asker]

I understand that but why be mean?

[HSalenko]

That is why, it's necessarily fair and while you don't deserve it per se, it's still your fault.

[Asker]

So he was because I hurt feelings? So did he like me for him to get so hurt and be harsh?

[HSalenko]

I don't know how many times I can say yes to the same question in different ways.

[Asker]

But what about this part : did he like me for him to get so hurt and be harsh?

[HSalenko]

I'm not really sure what that means, but I can't read his mind. Bottom line: he was mean because you were extremely late. Anything that happens is up to the two of you to work out, assuming you can.

[Asker]

He denied being mad but I can tell it bothered him. Why did he deny it…

[Asker]

? :)

[spartan55]

You already this once ffs. If you can't comprehend why he was pissed then you are profoundly stupid. Just move on already geez

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I find that is immature on his part but you should have at least texted a message or called him no offense to you or judgment on your part.

[Asker]

Should I reach out to him after 2 months of no contact?
He ignored my last question where I asked him ” What are you upto?” After that I went no contact.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

@asker Give it a try what you got to lose

[Asker]

I don’t want to look desperate/crazy

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

@Asker I understand what you mean and I agree with you

[Asker]

Would I be desperate if I reach out to him?

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

@Asker I wouldn't think so

[Asker]

Really, why do you think so?

[YHL6965]

Being late, especially that much is a huge disrespect. Next time, maybe respect the person first and they'll respect you more.

[Asker]

Do you think he was mean because he was hurt?

[YHL6965]

Because you being late was a huge disrespect.

[Asker]

did he like me for him to get so hurt and be harsh?

[Batmanismydaddy]

Just stfu and leave an hour before and be on time

[Asker]

@Batmanismydaddy I’m just shocked that he has so mean to me

[Batmanismydaddy]

Stop with the victim mentality. You're in the wrong here. You should apologize to him. And never be late ever again.

[YHL6965]

It's not about him enjoying being mean or something, it's him not respecting you much because YOU disrespected him in the first place by not only being late, but being 40 minutes late, which shows how little you care about him and how incosiderate you are to be that late

[Asker]

He said to me : I don’t want to waste time, I’m looking for my soulmate and good wife…

[Batmanismydaddy]

Girl, stop with the bs

[Asker]

@Batmanismydaddy what do u mean?

[Batmanismydaddy]

Stop with the victim mentality. You are in the wrong here. Only you. Apologize and move on. Better yourself

[Asker]

@Batmanismydaddy yeah but I want to know if he daid that out of hurt and not because he really meant that..

[Asker]

Said*

[Batmanismydaddy]

You need help. Go to therapy

[YHL6965]

Look, if you can't understand how being late, especially that late, finding a partner should not be your priority and you should prioritize getting your shit together.

[Asker]

I do understand but I want to know if he said those things out of hurt and not because he really meant that..

[Batmanismydaddy]

@YHL6965 she is a lost hope might as well stop replying

[YHL6965]

@Batmanismydaddy Yeah, you're right. Being on time is like something everyone knows about and it seems like she's trying to put this whole thing on him so yeah, I should probably not bother at this point.

[Batmanismydaddy]

@YHL6965 it was nice talking to you. We agree

[Asker]

@Batmanismydaddy would I be desperate/ crazy if I reach put to him?

[Asker]

Reach out*

[Batmanismydaddy]

Bruh stfu already. Call him and APOLOGIZE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE, SAY YOU FEEL SORRY FOR BEING LATE if you haven't already apologized and moved the fuck on. Work on yourself. This is the last time I reply. You're so rtrded

[Asker]

@Batmanismydaddy I already did apologize (not specifically for being late but generally) still he didn’t want to talk to me. Then I left him alone..

[Batmanismydaddy]

Who would want to talk to you? No one. Move on and leave the man alone

[Anonymous]

You are showing signs of a typical entitled spoiled narcissistic female so he is simply treating you like one should be treated.

[Asker]

Why would he try to hurt my feelings though?

[Opinion Owner]

Because that type of female needs to be knocked down a peg or two.

[Asker]

So does he hate me now?

[Opinion Owner]

Depends on how you act going forward.
If you act like your time is more important than his, if you act like your feelings are more important than his, if you act like you don’t have consequences, and if you didn’t seem sincere in your apology for being so late... then yes. He will start to hate you.

[Asker]

Tbh I didn’t habdle it well…idk know that he was really upset about it since he denied being mad at all. Now I’ve left him alone. Should I reach out to him again after he basically told me to fuck off?

[Asker]

? :)

[Twalli]

40 minutes late without notifying him is disrespectful.

[Anonymous]

That’s really late and rude if you didn’t call to say you would be, most people won’t wait that long

[Iron_Man]

What exactly did he say

[Asker]

He doesn’t want to waste time, he’s looking for his soulmate and good wife…

[Asker]

That really hurt me…

[Iron_Man]

I’m sorry to hear that try again with him

[Asker]

Should I really try again after what he said?

[Iron_Man]

I have no idea what he said that’s up to you if you desire this man Enough to want to be with him

[Iron_Man]

Did you still do things on the date or it ended right there

[Asker]

Do what things?

[Asker]

He said to me : I don’t want to waste time, he’s looking for his soulmate and good wife…

[Iron_Man]

Oh I thought he insulted you and other stuff etc. etc. He was just angry sometimes people say things they don’t mean. Some guys are old fashion and strict and when you show up 40 minutes late they think that you’re not serious especially on the first date. If you’re interested in the guy try again just make sure that you’re on time next time. I was talking about doing things on the date like going out to eat going to a movie or did it just end right there then he left or not?

[Asker]

No it didn’t end right there

[Asker]

We did have coffee date

[Asker]

He didn’t want continue to date..

[Iron_Man]

Ask him if he wants to try again this weekend

[Asker]

Do guys say those harsh things if they are angry?

[Iron_Man]

Yes they do

[Asker]

Why?

[Iron_Man]

They get angry they say things they don’t mean

[Asker]

by the way in your opinion why did he say ” when he first start talkibg I was looking for a wife. ” me and him never discussed about marriage altough we come from conservative culture.

[Iron_Man]

He probably didn’t cover his tracks he just blurted it out not realizing that you didn’t talk about it

[Asker]

So he thought about marrying me?

[Asker]

? :D

[Iron_Man]

No lol

[Asker]

Then why did he brought that up?

[Iron_Man]

He’s upset And wanted you to think hard

[Asker]

So he said just to upset me :D?

[Iron_Man]

You’ll have to ask him all these things once you guys start getting along just call the guy up and try again and set up a date for Saturday night and just show up on time

[Asker]

I don't know last time when we talked he said we’re done.. then he ignored my last message. I then left him alone. That’s why I’m nervous to reach out again…

[Iron_Man]

Call him right now and just start over fresh what do you have to lose? Why do you wanna drag this thing on into the fall just get it over with he either accepts or he doesn’t but at least you’ll have peace of mind knowing

[Asker]

We haven’t talked for 2 months. When he ignored me last time I left him alone….

[Iron_Man]

You have to decide let it go or continue on you’re gonna have to reach out to him why don’t you do it today as soon as you wake up and clear the air you’ll feel a lot better

[Asker]

I’m afraid that he thinks I’m desperate/ crazy. Last time he didn’t want anything to do with me (in June) .

[Iron_Man]

Well think about this if you do nothing it’s completely over forever do you want it to be over forever or do you want to try one more time? Obviously this is still bothering you what do you have to lose?

[Asker]

Is 2 months enough for him to change his mind? Also I was hoping that he would reach out..

[Iron_Man]

It’s been 60 days he’s not reaching out and you’re upset about it still because you’re talking about it so you need to reach out to him as soon as you wake up today be prepared mentally and just get it done and be a very positive and sweet. He can’t guess at how you’re feeling just get it done

[Asker]

He hasn’t reach out so it’s probably a lost cause?

[Iron_Man]

Don’t keep thinking so negative this needs to be resolved one way or the other get it done today if not this is gonna go on until Halloween night you’re gonna be sitting on Halloween thinking about this guy and making more questions on here wondering what you should do get it resolved

[Asker]

Since he rejected me shouldn’t he be the one to reach out?

[Iron_Man]

He hasn’t done it yet but there’s nothing wrong with the woman reaching out this day and age. The more you wait the more tougher it’s going to be you should do this quickly before he finds a girlfriend

[Asker]

by the way during the date he looked pissed. When he saw me he did do a double take on me. I don't know if he looked pissed because I was late or he didn’t find me attractive :/

[Iron_Man]

You’re second-guessing yourself you’re too paranoid and you still haven’t even called yet I don’t know where you live at but it’s still early call him up on Saturday

[In_Trance]

you posted this already. Stop posting this