He cancelled with me exactly 20 minutes before our first date! Why?

[Izzysimons]

This guy seemed super interested to meet me at first , he was texting me all the day long saying cute things and asking me what I wanted to do so when I was about to live the house to meet him he texts me saying that he was involved in a car accident. I was so surprised and at the same time kinda mad I just wasted my time and it's so hard to believe that he was saying the truth, what do you guys think? :) thank you

Updates

+1 y

Just found out that this guy is about to get married so this explains everything! Thank you guys for your opinions

[10dsw]

(1) If he used this as an excuse, then he is a real jerk or he REALLY wanted to get out of the date.

(2) Regardless of whether he used this as an excuse, I am baffled at how selfish you are. Rather than worry about his accident, you are posting on this app worrying about "me my feelings me our date me me me"

[10dsw]

As to your update - not surprised. Many guys use online dating and collect numbers solely for attention. I'll admit that I'm a Tinder tease and have strung girls along for attention ( and I'm not really proud of it)

[10dsw]

By the way was this date 10:45 at night? Because you're really dumb if you think a guy is meeting up with you that late looking for a relationship lol

[Izzysimons]

10dsw I've never mentioned that I was looking for a relationship ;) we were planning to go to a night club and 10:45 it would be the ideal time to meet up and doesn't really matter what we would do but since the cancellation and the truth came out it all changes.

[10dsw]

Ahh okay - well there's your answer - he was looking for attention on the side (unless you're making that part up). It happens. Good luck to you

[Blonde401]

She's selfish but you use tinder to collect numbers? Pot, kettle, black.

[10dsw]

@Blonde401 oh no lol I admit it's bad. That's why I said I wasn't proud of it

[Blonde401]

But then you don't really have the right to call anyone selfish.

[10dsw]

@Blonde401 I'll call people selfish if I want to call them selfish :) They have the right to say the same about me

[Blonde401]

Seems redundant though. And turns out she wasn't even selfish. He was a liar.

[10dsw]

@Blonde401 Welcome to the real world princess

[Blonde401]

Patronising as well. No wonder you don't have a real relationship and have to collect tinder garbage to make yourself feel good.

[10dsw]

@Blonde401 I'm not looking for a real relationship. Too busy at this stage of my life

[Blonde401]

Then don't date.

[10dsw]

@Blonde401 I don't. That's why I said I only collect Tinder matches lol

[Blonde401]

Sounds like a waste of time.

[TripleAce]

I say bullshit... ... If that was me I'd send you a picture of the accident... and I think anyone would do the same just because... for one to avoid doubt and 2 it's just natural given that sending pictures takes a literally 2 seconds

[Smegskull]

Sending pictures isn't covered by most contracts and gets charged a lot.

[TripleAce]

@Smegskull wrong
Sending pictures are covered by 80% of cell phone plans... the dude is using iMessage genius... meaning he has Internet lol... pay attention hahah

[Golden25]

Ask how he is. Naturally if he is interested then when he gets things out of the crises mode then he will reschedule the date. If he doesn't then you have your answer but give it some time. Don't doubt him as he will be expecting some concern on your part.

[lyannamormont]

I dont think anyone would lie about a serious matter like death, traffic accident etc to flake on a date. He would simply not show up, which is much easier choice instead of creating big lie like this. I would believe and give one more chance.

[Blonde401]

You'd be wrong. I've honestly had someone use this nonsense on me before. It was a total lie and I caught them in it.

[lyannamormont]

@Blonde401 what in the actual fuck that people waste time on playing games like this. For both to yout Blonde401 and to the update.

[Blonde401]

People are horrendous sometimes and total bullshitters. What a scumbag he is.

[peachpitt]

I would say , unless he is known to be a liar , he got in a car wreck.

Ask about him and if he's ok , reschedule. Don't read into this. You are acting insecure.

[That1tallguy]

That seems like too big of a lie just to flake on a date. You should give him the benefit of the doubt rescedual your date. If he cancelles again then forget him

[PureBliss]

Lol so you're basically assuming that he just flaked after he said he got into a car wreck. The first thing I'd be conceded about if I really liked this guy would be his safety. That selfishness probably turned him off tbh. But if he does give you another chance, I wouldn't take it for granted 😉

[PureBliss]

Concerned*

[Brutal_Honesty]

fucking amen to this ^

[Brutal_Honesty]

also i dont think "conceded" was an entirely inappropriate word, given the circumstances. it was just in the wrong sentence thats all :D

[PureBliss]

Haha literally I was thinking the same thing!!😂 thank you! Lmao

[Brutal_Honesty]

i might even use this as a lie if im ever dating a girl. just to make sure her reaction is "omg are you ok" instead of that "lol sure dude" emoji that she used. certainly helps to make sure they aren't a psychopath of any kind!

[Brutal_Honesty]

but that would make me the bad guy i guess..

[Smegskull]

I think you are thinking of conceited not conceded.

[Brutal_Honesty]

@Smegskull i think so too :(
fuck

[Brutal_Honesty]

i blame the americans for not being able to pronounce the letter T
(letter = ladder etc)

English is not my first language. i have bad influences!

[Smegskull]

I am more than happy to join you. Blaming Americans for damaging my countries language is a personal hobby of mine.

[Brutal_Honesty]

@Smegskull country's

sorry, i couldnt resist :D

[UncleRayRay]

Give him the benefit of the doubt... or don't, it's up to you really

[kenjaminSlutton716]

Haha this happened to me I didn't believe her and she sent picks then said i was a dick for not asking if she was okay lmao i still don't believe her though anyone can pull pics of their same car in an accident offline and she was kinda weird anyway and come to find out had a boyfriend the whole time

[Blonde401]

... well he says he got into a crash but honestly I've had guys use lies like this before to cancel. So I don't know what to believe TBH.

[TripleAce]

Ya lol I mean of course it sounds like a lie
Why does anyone need to cancel a whole date just cause of a little fender bender lol... I mean it takes max an hour to get on your way and leave, the date just needs to be postponed cancelling is way worse if you really liked her...

Unless it's a bad accident, which I doubt cause he or ironically has time to message her 15 mins before the date during his accident lol but not call...

Sounds like total bs lol

[TripleAce]

Just look at what he even says
His last message then all of a sudden omg I just got home lol...
So between when the paper work was done and you were driving home you didn't think to be like hey just finished what's up lol

Yaya lol sure hahah

[Blonde401]

@TripleAce yeah thank you. Sounds super fishy to me.

[Blonde401]

@TripleAce I've had someone use this bullshit on me before and I caught them in the lie. So I know people use elaborate lies like this cause they're cowards. He could have sent a photo.

[TripleAce]

Yup and we were right lol... look at her update
high five.. yaay

[Blonde401]

@TripleAce oh my god. Yes. we were right! Goes to show the skeptics aren't crazy lol.

[snowshy]

It's possible he's telling the truth. If you're that into him, let him reschedule and hope for the best.

If he flakes again, only then would I say it is safe to assume he's messing you around

[19magic]

He had a car crash and your not even asking him if he got hurt wow

[witherwing]

Just give him the chance to reschedule! That sounds like a legit reason to take a rain check.

[ProssimaFermata]

Give him the benefit of the doubt. I have legitlly had Shit happen when I was on the way to a date or something. It sucks. Ask him when he would like to reschedule.

[Brutal_Honesty]

wow how selfish can you get?

no i mean YOU

he was in a CAR ACCIDENT

[LetMeSpankU]

Maybe some personal problem came up. Maybe he's got wife /GF and problems happened. Maybe, maybe etc. etc.

[Nice222]

Get over yourself and try being a little concerned about his situation. If you really don't believe him set up another date and ask him to show you the damage.

[es20490446e]

Because he got nervous as fuck, and crashed the car into something. Not a dress revenge.

[Anonymous]

He just told you why he cancelled. You should give him the benefit of the doubt.

[Smegskull]

It's possible it's not about you... Just putting it out there.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Go on the next date. It's no big deal really.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

What a disgusting guy. You dodged a bullet.

[GirlExMachina]

Why? Probably because he got into a car accident

[Bell44444]

Where's the part where you asked him if he was ok?

[Jinxx2196]

something came up? or cold feet? just ask him

[clubby789]

Seems unlikely that he’d cancel deliberately