I still don’t understand why is it that my ex watches me from a distance and looks at me along with his friends but acts like he doesn’t know me?

[Anonymous]

Basically I noticed that my ex literally walked away as I was walking in his direction as we both were over a mutual friends house and as he heard my voice he hurried up and walked away but not far he stood in our friend yard with his back turned towards me which is confusing because he’s now starting to do this out of nowhere we broke up 6 moths ago because he cheated and I also notice that when he left the yard he went across the street to sit and smoke with his other friends and as I was getting ready to leave and walk pass then he was looking at me and watching me in a since from across the street but not when I was walking near him earlier I’m not understanding what is his problem with me? He’s acting like he doesn’t know me or something I’m fine with him keeping his distance and I’m not trying to force anything I’m just not understanding why is it that he’s not acting and behaving this way for no apparent reason towards me when I don’t bother or speak to him but a few weeks ago he don’t do this he spoke to me when we bumped into each other

Updates

1 y

@Anonymouswoman4309 yeah he’s probably feels ashamed that he got caught in the act cause no one came back and told me the reason how I knew he was cheating on me is because my intuition kept repeatedly telling me literally like 2 or 3 weeks before me and him even broke up and he tried to gaslight me and manipulate me into thinking that he want cheating he was saying things like how tf are you going to tell me that I’m cheating on you oh you dumb asf and this and that no baby boy I was right

Updates

1 y

And when I was trying to tell him about the situation with his friend he actually kind of wanted to hear what I had to say because he was like bruh just say whatever it is that you need to say then and I was like okay but it’s quite a long story and then he was like naw nevermind then I don’t even wanna know or even hear it so I said okay

[Anonymous]

After reading this and your second update, unfortunately I don’t think this is a matter of him being regretful. I’m really sorry, what he did was wrong 100%, but if he’s cheating in his teen years, this is immature and selfish behavior. He doesn’t care so much about hurting you as he cares about getting caught. I think his reaction to you at the party was him not being sure if he should approach you and say something to break the ice since you were trying to ignore him as well, but it wasn’t some deep feeling of loss and regret. If it were, I guarantee he would act on it and he chose not to. Anyway, I think ignoring him until he finds the balls to approach and apologize for cheating, if he’s even really sorry. Find closure on your own, move forward and leave him be. Getting over your first heartbreaks and all that can really suck, but it gets easier overtime. I only say this from having went through all this from 15-18 with the “love of my life”.

[Asker]

Yeah I kind of have just coped with everything the best way that I could possibly have and honestly I’ve kind of have been telling people the same thing because everybody as in relationship experts and even some psychics keeps saying oh he feels bad about what he did and his behavior but part of me believes it and another part of me doesn’t because we’ve been broken up for almost 6 months and he still won’t admit to cheating and he still has not apologized and he’s never been the type to express his feelings because of his past and because he’s a broken damaged Person but at the same time that doesn’t give him a right to do people lowdown and dirty and act like nothing ever happened I even noticed around last month that he would make eye contact with me and would sometimes speak to me but now he’s acting weird and Stange where he will look at me and will stare at me but won’t acknowledge or say anything to me and I guess he doesn’t like really being near me Which is why I said that soon as he heard my voice walking in his direction he was quick to get up form his seat and walked away and he didn’t look at me cause he had already had his head down and as he walked away he didn’t walk far he just stood in our friends yard with his back turned towards my way and was talking to our friend just like that with his back turned towards my way because our mutual friend was standing near me because he had came outside but once I left my ex was already sitting with his other friends outside and their were all smoking and was looking at me as I was getting ready to walk pass them to go home and I immediately noticed that my ex was looking at me and was sort of staring at me as I was walking pass by and he didn’t have nothing to say so I don’t know why he’s now starting to behave this way because months ago and weeks ago he wasn’t really acting or behaving this way and I do know that he’s currently going through his own personal issues within himself because he’s damaged

[Opinion Owner]

Honestly girl, he just has a lot of growing up to do. By nature women are generally more mature than men, but in your age range especially. There may come a time in the future where he can look back at these mistakes and have grown enough as a person and as a man to realize his faults, but not now. 9/10 his friends are either just like him or influence his bad behavior. Unless he’s got a good male figure in his life like a dad/uncle/coach/etc to help keep him on the track where he does right by his partner, then it’ll take a long time for him to learn how to be a faithful guy on his own, without outside influence playing a big role in his decision making.

[Opinion Owner]

You’re handling everything the best you can, and that’s really all you can do is take it one day at a time. There can be any number of reasons why he looks at you often, but if I were you I wouldn’t make any of it my business. It’s only a distraction to keep you focused on him in one way or another, and you don’t want that. I’d say keep ignoring him as if he doesn’t exist, don’t fuel the fire and don’t talk to him for closure or none of that, since he’s had many chances the clear the air with you and either dismissed what you say or doesn’t try at all. That’s a big no thanks.

[AnonyWoman4309]

It's that exact thing - it's the fact you don't bother or speak to him - that's why he's acting like that. It seems like he regrets losing you and regrets everything he did. However at the same time he's being flakey, he probably thinks you know you deserve something better. Still, I wouldn't give him another chance.

[Asker]

Yeah I kind of agree with your response because I feel like with him he speaks with everyone else but me which is fine but he had this type of trait where he wants to act like he doesn’t know me but wants to so called observe me and make eye contact and look at me from across and all which is weird but when I was walking toward his direction he had his head down because he was doing something i think but besides that he hurried up and quickly walked away soon as he heard my Voice in his direction and decided to be sassy and turn his back towards me for whatever reason but I feel like at the same time he Shii do stop behaving this way know he’s going through a lot from what I’ve heard but he’s now starting to behave this way toward me and I don’t burger him we’ve been blocked each other months ago cause like I said he was cheating so we ended our relationship and if he regrets losing me then I feel like with us being separated for almost 6 months he should have been admitting to cheating and betraying me behind my back and backstabbing me and he should have apologized but yet again he has not done anything whatsoever he has been kind of avoiding me and acting like he doesn’t know me but weeks and months ago he wasn’t doing any of this he just started this last week and when I tried to have a conversation with him about what his friend was doing behind his back as far as in trying to date me and when I tried to reach out to my ex boyfriend through social media on Instagram he literally had an attitude for whatever reason and he was being kind of dismissive for no reason he was like he didn’t want to hear anything unless it concerns him or has something to do with him and that he’s only focused on making his music and money which is why i said he’s kind of going through a few things in his life but also he was making slick ass comments and was like why are you texting me is it because your bored or because you must want your Vagina ate and I said what tf🤦🏾‍♀️

[AnonyWoman4309]

Wow. So a few things:
- I actually think he is probably ashamed - not because he cheated - but because you figured out. And in the time you guys didn't talk he probably thinks you grew to realize how bs him and the entire relationship was.
- I can tell he has a hard time admitting when he's wrong about something - especially something that big, being caught cheating. It probably hurts his ego to think about the harm done, nonetheless apologize for it.
- He's horny and probably wants sex from you.
- He probably thinks you told him about his friend to make him jealous which is why he probably acted aloof. That happened to me before too.
- The whole looking at you and then turning away when you come near thing sounds so immature. Honestly the next time you catch him looking at you just ignore it. Completely ignore him at this point. He's a lost cause and you might not ever get that apology until he's left alone for far longer than you guys have had a relationship/on and off thing.

[FilmGuy93]

This isn't a tough read; if you were going to do something like that, what would your motivation be?

[Asker]

Wait what do you mean by that?🤷🏽‍♀️

[FilmGuy93]

If the roles were reversed, and you were doing to him the exact behaviors he's doing to you; what would make you do those things?

[In_Trance]

Why are you watching your ex watch you?

It's like you don't know how to break up...

[Asker]

Wait what do you mean it’s not like how to break up no that’s not the case and first of all I’m not watching him I noticed that in his behavior towards me because that’s something he just started doing so of course I’m going to pay attention to it because he wasn’t doing any of this before

[In_Trance]

watching is the same as paying attention

[Anonymous]

Stop stressing over the how and why and just forget about that guy.

[Asker]

It’s hard forgetting about someone especially that I was in a on and off again relationship with who hurt me and embarrassed me and cheated and betrayed me behind my back and now is acting like he does not know me and can’t seem to apologize or admit to doing me dirty and wrong and can’t even apologize about his behavior

[Opinion Owner]

True, but life does move on.