Does my guy friend like me back?

[KissMeDeadly]

I have feelings for a guy I’ve been friends with for 20 + years, awhile back I told him how I feel. I was wondering if anyone could give me some insight if it’s just friendly behavior or something more. It seems like in recent months we can’t go a week or so without seeing each other, tell each other we love each other often. In January we were out w/my friend , my shithead cousin showed up was being obnoxious, made me uncomfortable so this friend of mine I hugged and we stayed like that for awhile, he comforted me rubbed my arms. My cousin is at it again being rude, we head to another place while seated I turned wrapped my arms around his one arm and then he grabbed my hand locked fingers with me and rubbed my hand and stayed like that for awhile. He had a bit to drink so we sit in my car for over two hours talking, bring up what we want in relationships, I say what I want, he says all he wants is the same things. when we say goodbye he hugs me a few times and holds me back and looks at me. We both do nothing. FYI I’m a coward lol. I went away for a week recently he wanted to see me beforehand, meet up, hugs me tells me he’s gonna miss me kisses my cheek and asks me to let me know when I land safely. When I get back it’s his bday asks “what are we doing for his bday” meet up have dinner with two of his other friends, but when I get home he calls me, we talk on the phone for 5 hours till about 4 am. And now recently while driving to pick up his friend in another state to work a convention he called me and we talked on the phone for two hours he stopped for a break and gas sent some snaps of himself then called back and talked to me the rest of the way till he got to his friends house for another two hours. While working the convention he’s sent snaps of the con and his friend saying hi that I know and the two of them or just him. I’m not sure if he sees me as a very close friend or if there are feelings there I should act on , if anyone could give me some guidance!

[tesniolite]

by the way in future can you PARAGRAPHH

From what you've shared, it seems like he's more than just a friend.

I mean, come on, you two can't go a week without seeing each other, and you tell each other "I love you" all the time? That's not exactly typical behavior for just friends. And let's not forget the hand-holding and long, lingering hugs - those are definite signs that he's feeling some strong emotions.

When your cousin showed up and started acting like a jerk, your friend swooped in to comfort you and even rubbed your arms. And then later, when you were sitting together, he grabbed your hand, locked fingers with you, and rubbed your hand for a while - that's not exactly platonic.

i am just spelling this out for you

if i said my friend was doing that stuff COULD YOU REALLY SAY there's NO CHANCE?/

[KissMeDeadly]

I’m new to this site, I’ve only been on it a few times. I was trying to have paragraphs and it has limited characters where I couldn’t fit it all and it all felt important.

It’s not exactly “ I love you” maybe several times worded that way, but usually “ love you” or tell each other we appreciate each other. when it’s happening to someone else it’s more obvious but when it’s yourself and someone isn’t making a move in last two years you start wonder why. We have been friends a long time but only the last two we hang out and talk consistently where more things happen. He also was drinking a little when he locked hands so I wasn’t sure if it was some drunken moment. But you’re right and thank you for taking time to respond I appreciate it

[EclipsedMoonlight]

It sounds like he genuinely cares for you, but maybe he is scared if it doesn't work out it will ruin your friendship? You said you already told him your feelings so the ball is in his court. But he does seem like he cares more than a friend with what you described. Best advice I can say is to be patient. Good luck!

[KissMeDeadly]

Thank you for responding ! It does feel different than a regular friendshio, and we have become extremely close and confide in each other a lot. I just wasn’t sure if I was reading things wrong. When I told him a long time ago it was poor timing and didn’t say how he felt back bc he went on a date and I told him a few days after, which was a huge mistake on my part so I think at that time it not sure if he was still gonna see her again and addressing what I said was complicated. Not the best choice I ever made. But he didn’t go out with her again, and he didn’t run away we just got closer and closer. Now I’m recent months just seems more touchy, talks to me everyday. I used to think I should back off too bc it could ruin it but now with time realized I don’t even want to be with anyone else and I’ve become more confident it would work. He’s said things recently about things we have in common and what we both want in life etc and how close we are so I’m hoping he’s possibly realizing it too. Thank you for your thoughtful response. It was helpful.

[KissMeDeadly]

When I told him awhile ago that was about a year and a half ago.

[EclipsedMoonlight]

You're welcome 😊 maybe try again. It definitely seems like he does like you though. I wish you the best!

[EclipsedMoonlight]

Tysm for MHO

[David4358]

yes he likes you but you both seem a little shy to make the first move. next time you are with him kiss him, Or at the very least lean in most of the way like you are going to kiss him and see if he moves forward and kisses you.

If you both dont make a move then you will regret it for the rest of your life. Some other girl is going to find him attractive and go for him and then you have lost out on your chance.. go for it

[KissMeDeadly]

Thank you so much for the advice ! I’m going to talk about how I feel or try what you said and see what happens. I am a little nervous about trying to kiss him. But I will get close and see what happens. I am shy making the first move bc I’ve been rejected by even someone who liked me. I know he’s shy making the first move too just bc of his past relationships

[Pegases]

Why have the two of you never explored more than just friendship in over 20 years?

[KissMeDeadly]

We didn’t always hang out all those years we would see each other or say hi every so often. I had a long term relationship of 14 years, he was in a long one too. For the first time we are both single in the last two years or so. I didn’t have feelings for him that whole time, we have spent a lot of time with each other the last two years talk all the time now and we have become extremely close so getting to know him in a deeper level and having long convos spending so much time together things have changed. At least for me anyway

[spartan55]

So you told him how you feel and he said what?

[KissMeDeadly]

I did that over a year and a half ago, like an idiot through text after he went on some date. So I felt like it was poor timing and out hun on the spot, I also said like an idiot I don’t expect anything so I think he thought I don’t expect him to say anything. It was a terrible move all around, I regret it. He text back and was sweet and sent hearts but didn’t acknowledge what I said. When stuff fell through and didn’t go on a date with the girl again after that he didn’t run away or get weird we have only gotten closer.

[KissMeDeadly]

Sorry for the typos

[spartan55]

Wow, that was cringe just reading it... glad you realize it was a mistake...

[KissMeDeadly]

Oh yeah big time, I was nervous as hell I never do anything through text either but thought I’d make an ass out of myself in person and not get the words out right, I was afraid of loosing him after knowing him so long.

[spartan55]

Never say anything important over text. It's meaningless.

[KissMeDeadly]

Oh yeah, I definitely agree. Lesson learned on that one.