What is he trying to achieve?

Question

Me and this guy had something going until i asked the "what are we" question , he told me its an irrelevant question. From time to time i would ask that question because he treats me like shit but acts as if he owns me. All of a sudden "i don’t ask the right questions because if i did then i would understand certain things instead of concluding" ... of which I'm doing what he does to me

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It's difficult to say exactly what he's trying to achieve without more context, but it seems like he may be avoiding committing to a relationship with you and doesn't want to have to define your relationship. He may be treating you poorly because he doesn't want to be in a relationship but still wants to keep you around. It's possible that he's also trying to manipulate you by making you doubt yourself and your ability to understand the situation.

It's important for you to think about what you want and what you're willing to accept in a relationship. If you're not happy with the way he's treating you and the lack of clarity in your relationship, you may want to consider moving on and finding someone who is willing to commit to you and treat you with respect.

summiter · Accepted Answer

He does not own you and you had a good question. Are/were you sexually involved with him? If so how is that going?

Cynicaldreamer · Accepted Answer

Oh... one of "those" guys.
He's using you- he wants the perk of being a boyfriend without the title or being "held down." That's why he get snippy when you ask him what are you: he wants you to think he cares, loves you, and wants to be with you.

No, he does not. He just wants you at his beck and call, and to do things for him without you being tied to him. That way if he finds a girl he does want to seriously date, he can say to you, "We're not a couple!"

So he wins and you get heartbroken and used. Please don't waste your time dealing with him; you'll only wind up with a headache and heartache wondering why he treats you the way he does.