Why boyfriend is surprised after he neglects me?

[Anonymous]

He is one of those needing space and personal time, cancelling dates etc

I got super tired of this shit and started to act kinda distanced

And he now asks me whats wrong

Like he been pushing me away

And now that im so done

He is surprised... why?

[sapiodvnt]

I agree with @spartan55, that you should talk to him about what is bothering you. Good communication is essential in any relationship, but especially with a romantic interest. In a romantic relationship, there are a lot more insecurities from both parties. You need to be able to talk about things without fear of rejection. You need to be able to be open and honest with one another. There are details missing in your question that would probably change my opinion on this matter. Did you ask him why he was neglecting you? How long was this behavior going on? What else was going on in his life that made him "need space"? Is it possible that he felt smothered, or that you were dominating all of his time? Maybe he was worried that the relationship was getting to a commitment level that he wasn't prepared for? I understand you wanting to get some advice before confrontation, but this is a question you should have asked him first.

[Asker]

He prefers crack to me
Ok
He pefers staying at home smoking crack that spend weekend with me

[Asker]

And last year i discovered on his phone he still talked to his ex
And on one of the messages he told her "i had great time yesterday, thanks"
Then when i once asked if he ever met with her while dating me or if he still talks to her he said no
And its a lie i saw all their messages and even late night phone calls. And even him sending her a picture of his meal.
Then he deleted all that.

[sapiodvnt]

I don't think I can state this plainly, or strongly, enough. Get away from this toxic person!

[Asker]

Its fukced up
Im done

[spartan55]

Maybe you should talk to him about what's bothering you?

[jahaims]

Because you are both poor communicators