Why did he hesitate to sit next to me during the lecture and ultimately chose to sit next to his friend?

[Anonymous]

For context, I've seen him looking at me from a distance, however as soon as I look at him he turns his gaze away or pretends not to see me.

[Oliverlogan263]

A'ight, there could be a few reasons why he hesitated to sit next to you and chose to sit with his friend instead:

- Nerves/shyness - Even though he's clearly interested, approaching you directly like that probably made him really nervous. Sitting with his buddy was a safer option to avoid feeling on the spot.

- Worried about misreading signals - Dude might not be 100% sure you're into him too. Sitting alone with you could've felt like too big a risk if he thought you might not be receptive.

- Feeling self-conscious - Maybe he was worried about what you or his friend might think if he suddenly ditched them to sit by himself with you. Felt shy about making a bold move.

- Safety in numbers - Swooping in alone would've put more pressure on him to hold a conversation. Having his boy there takes some of the pressure off in case things got awkward.

- Overthinking it - Once we start crushing, it's easy to spiral into what-ifs and doubts. He may have over-analyzed how you'd react and chickened out last second.

I'd say give him some reassuring smiles if you make eye contact. That could help him build the courage to sit by you next time. Guys hate rejection! Keep it casual and don't pressure him. Hope he'll come around.

[Monalisa77]

Hey can u see my qs i posted since September? Thanks

[Asker]

First, thank you for your answer. I think you're right, I smiled at him and his behavior completely changed (positively). thanks again

[Oliverlogan263]

No problem sis! I'm glad smiling at him seemed to help break the ice. Dudes can be so awkward sometimes, especially around a pretty girl they like.

But it sounds like your smile showed him you're friendly and approachable. Bet it totally made his day too! Now that he knows you're cool, hopefully he'll start to open up more.

Keep doing you and don't stress if he still seems shy. Y'all have class together so just let things progress naturally. Who knows, maybe soon he'll work up the nerve to say hi back or sit a little closer next time.

In the meantime, catch those eyebeams he be sending your way across the room! Seems pretty clear homeboy is feelin you. Just give him space to come out his shell in his own time. You got this sis!

[spartan55]

That's great. Who is he?

[Asker]

What do you mean?

[spartan55]

I mean who is he?

[Anonymous]

Does he usually sit next to you?

[Asker]

No, never

[Opinion Owner]

You suspect he has interest? If so, why want a man without even the smallest balls to have a conversation? If u are shy too it’s a disaster in the works, nothing will get done. U need an opposite.

[Monalisa77]

I don't know if uve seen my qs but I've hsd a man flirting and staring (not from like afar, literally right up close n the first time he turned round n i was against a wall sitting next to his cousin) but he chose not to sit beside me and didn't rrslly initiate conversation, its so confusing like why go to the effort of flirting but dont wanna see me more to get to know me?

[Asker]

I don't know, I like shy guys, they're super sweet. I'm not shy, but quite reserved.

[Asker]

@Monalisa77 Hi, he probably just likes the attention sadly.

[Monalisa77]

he's so chatty with everyone else n was fine before all this with me

[Monalisa77]

I haven't given him any lol