My manager in my new first job is kind of touchy. Is this normal behaviour ?

[Anonymous]

I've lived in a very conservative country being Japan for most my life and recently moved to America for study, where I have gotten my first new job at a coffee place. Now i don't mean to waste peoples time but i don't know if this is normal since people in America are generally very friendly with each other and greet each other using physical welcomes.

My manager often likes to take pictures after every shift with work people, and manager says it is reason for memories and a Instagram video edit.

last Monday my manager was taking the picture with me and wrapped his hand on my waist. I thought it was fine and so didn't make a big deal since he seemed very nonchalant however last Wednesday he instead put hand on my backside. I moved away and he said this is normal when i asked what he was doing. he seemed mad

I know it wasn't normal because even though Japan conservative, this is still inappropriate.

I started doubting myself again until yesterday when he hit my backside after i made a joke. I got embarrassed and mad and told him off but he only laughed!

Please give me information whether this is normal in America. Being overly touchy. What do i do?

Thank you

[Oliverlogan263]

Yo that definitely doesn't sound normal or cool at all. Touching you without permission is not okay, especially in inappropriate areas. Managers are supposed to like respect your boundaries n stuff.

I guess people can be pretty friendly here but there's still rules aboutkeeping your hands to yourself, you know? Like a friendly handshake or pat on the back is one thing but groping you is way over the line.

I'd say you gotta tell someone about what he's doing, like maybe report him to the store owner or boss above him. You don't deserve to feel uncomfortable at work. If he tries touching you again real stern tell him to stop. You could also ask another coworker to be there with you just in case too, so you feel safer.

Don't let him make you doubt yourself - you know the difference between friendly and creepy. Stay strong, and get that dude in trouble before he does it to someone else too!

[veganrogue]

No it's not appropriate. Especially if he sees that you are uncomfortable and he still does it. Is there a human resources person you can go to at your company to make a formal complaint? I'd make it very clear that's it's not OK. But in any case I'd get it on the record.

I work at a very conservative company and the men outnumber the women by a huge percentage. I can't even imagine having to deal with the sexual harassment on a daily basis. The Me Too movement helped shine a light on a lot of these abuses, however sadly it still goes on. We have to attend harassment training every year which covers what you can and can't do with your co-workers. And any type of touching beyond a handshake is considered inappropriate.

[slatyb]

It's not normal. His behavior is sexual harassment. Where do you work? If he is an employee and not the owner, contact his manager or someone in corporate HR. If he's the owner, find somewhere else to work. Before you leave, ask the other female employees if they have had a similar experience. Then consider contacting an employment lawyer.

[KrakenAttackin]

His touching and photographing is NOT appropriate. Start by telling him to please stop touching you. If he persists, contact corporate HR.

[Jmmmfi4]

DEFINITELY NOT NORMAL

[Anonymous]

He wanna sex 100%