What does it mean when a guy starts giving you attention after he ignored you because of his girlfriend?

[Anonymous]

i have that one guy at school, who started giving me attention and it looked like he was interested. he even told his friends about me and i saw him almost every day. it seemed like he wanted to be near. this situation lasted about half a year, but then it ended. i suddenly stopped seeing him around, i barely saw him once a week. then i discovered he had a girlfriend. i didn't even expect something could have changed, i thought it's over. then i wrote him anonymous letter on a Valentine's day. it was just friendly, but i admitted that i wanted to be friends with him. i don't know if he thinks it was written by me, but from that day he got it, things have changed and surprisingly he doesn't ignore me anymore. i see him more often even though it's not that often like it used to be. so what does that mean? thanks for any tips or advices.

[DoggyDude]

So, first off, you need to know why this question matters to you; Secondly, consider your reasons for changing your position towards him and ask yourself if your only interested now because he's got a girlfriend or becoming interested in other girls (or if this is just waking you up to having let yourself down by not indicating to this guy you would like to be his girlfriend).

So I don't and can't know which and maybe your just asking out of curiosity of what might have been.

It seems clear, you describe someone showing a lot of interest in you, until he found his grilfriend, but its also suggested he didn't maybe try to make you his girlfriend (or did he? and you insisted on being only friends?).

Anyway, what this means, in my opinion is you have developed strong feelings for this guy and seeing him with another girl has spured you to act. If you find this is because you have been a fool to yourself not letting him know you want to be his girlfriend, it might be reasonable to do a little polite following up (just as a friend because you now need to respect his new relationship, but that doesn't mean you don't let him know your seeing him different, just you don't want to get him by luring him from another girl, because if you do that you'll not be able to trust him as a boyfriend).

So, I advise, be friendly, indicate you like him, and ask if he's single. I mean we don't know really maybe this is just a girl he's starting to like and its not official yet.

Anyway his answer will be instructive and remaining his friend, who he has a good idea you like him as more potentially, will be a good situation to be in to see what transpires.

Just remember though, put yourself in the other girls shoes and think what you would accept if you where dating him and another girl liked him. Try to be as good to her as you would have yourself be treated if he became your boyfriend.

[ManOnFire]

Pretty sure he probably figured out that you were the one who wrote the letter. The part you didn't really explain is why you think he ignored you because it was about his girlfriend. I mean, I do lean towards your idea being correct, but I would want to know what were the indicators to you. Both men and women will often pathetically ignore someone of the opposite sex because their lover wants them to, although this is mostly with young people but still happens with others.

[Asker]

well, it's most likely that he just found a girlfriend at that time. so that's why i think he started to ignore me. he probably wanted to move on and focus on his new relationship.

[strateguy632]

now he is available, ask if he wants to hang out

[Avicenna]

Well, most likely he thinks there is an opportunity to cheat with you.

[Iron_Man]

is he still with the girlfriend

[Asker]

i'm also questioning that, but on the other hand, he's still a bit more distant than before, so it would make sense, that he just thinks the letter was from me.