Guys, how can I know if a boy is falling on love?

[Anonymous]

how it is for boys falling in love? do they think about their girl often? how do they act? how long does it take for a boy to fall in love?

[Anonymous]

A boy falling in love (a young man) is frequently chaotic. The feelings of 'being in love' are easily confused for crushes when very young. When I was growing up adults used to piss me off by saying "When your in love you just KNOW it", which was SO unhelpful, yet as an adult I know thats true.

So, let me break down the states:

o Crushes - It's impossible for a young person to recognise a crush from love. They just don't have any comparison points and crushes are likely to feel like the entire world to them without the experience of other loves (here I'm not talking about sex or making any euphamisms I'm purely speaking of real and true love for another). The one defining thing about a crush is it's overwhelming and myopic (though unfortunately, the deepest loves also have this often, hence why its really hard to know).

o First Love - This is when the crush turns into something where the boy first sacrifices for love, here meaning that he realises his love for some girl is so deep they are willing to go against their own interests for her sake, It's first love because its usually a shallow going against their own interests, maybe they take on some hobby they wouldn't otherwise enjoy and feel its a scarifice, something small. It can be first love leads to lasting love, but its also possible it's just a hyper-crush (meaning at some point they wake up to realise whilst they are happy to make a small sacrifice perhaps the important ones are difficult on unwelcomed).

o True Love - This is when a man (usually boys don't reach this, but not impossible) realises they love the girl so much all they care about is her happyness, but they desperately want to be the one to make her the MOST happy and for her to choose them. Though, because of true love if they realise your need is in someone else they will find a way, perhaps a little with difficulty to step aside for that which will make you most happy.

Okay, so these three conditions all share commonalities and a person exibiting Crush and First love might be True Love but just not yet fully realised.

I know this answer sucks in that I am sharing what other adults shared with me, that 'when I'm in love I'll just know it'. The same for other boys, they will know but the difficulty is, they will only truly know when they have enough experience, and after their first true love has been encountered.

I can say one thing, a good sign of someone erring towards true love is, they think about what you want more than they think about what they want, but show signs that its maybe a bit hurtful to them when what you want is not them.

Good luck.